


Blessing of Light, Curse of Darkness

by NetRaptor



Series: Destiny and Destiny 2 stories [23]
Category: Destiny (Video Games)
Genre: Ahamkara, Amnesia, Curses, Enemies to Friends, Friendship, Gen, Moral Dilemmas, Revenge, Time Loop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-18
Updated: 2019-04-10
Packaged: 2019-11-23 17:46:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 58,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18155048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NetRaptor/pseuds/NetRaptor
Summary: Still battered after the events of Forsaken as detailed in Fireteam Vengeance, Jayesh is assigned to visit the Dreaming City and try to redeem a Taken with the Light. This means teaming up with his ex-friend Madrid, a powerful Hunter who succumbed to the whispers of Riven and tried to feed Jayesh to the Chimera. But Madrid is sane again, and lives each time loop cycle in deep regret. Jayesh is the last person he ever wanted to work with again.As they unwillingly cooperate to track down their target, they run across a newly-resurrected Guardian. Prince Uldren, who retains only old memories, has no idea that Madrid killed him, or why all Guardians hate him so much. Jayesh and Madrid, barely allies, are now faced with another hard question: to befriend Uldren, or let him become prey for the other Guardians, who still crave revenge for the death of Cayde-6.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Note: I have expanded the timeline for the game's events. In-game, it's been six months since Cayde died, but in the story world, it's been eighteen months. Other events are also spaced out more.
> 
> Note 2: This story draws heavily from the end of Fireteam Vengeance, an adapt of Forsaken's storyline. The backstory for Ferral and Lethia happens in Awoken and Guardian.

And the glow is getting white  
But it's not Light  
It's the daylight breaking down  
In your eyes  
As the Darkness tells its solitary lie  
  
Blind, the Echoing Green

* * *

 

Jayesh was blissfully, deeply grateful.

He lay in bed, his arms around his sleeping wife, Kari. His nose was buried in her hair, and his heart felt ready to burst with happiness and contentment. He'd just returned from a month-long assignment on Venus, where he'd missed his little family with a powerful ache.

Kari couldn't go with him on missions anymore, since she had to stay home to raise their son, Connor. This was hard on them both, especially since Kari was the better fighter. But Jayesh sucked it up and worked with other Guardians, improving his skills, and told nobody but his ghost how much he missed his wife.

But he was home in the Tower, and all was well. Jayesh's gratitude overflowed, and before he knew it, he was thanking the Traveler - for choosing him, for making him a Guardian, for making beautiful Kari a Guardian, for granting them a child of the Light, for everything it did for them. The bliss poured out of him, lying there in silence, yet singing in his heart.

When Jayesh had been a brand new Guardian, he had climbed up into the Traveler and been locked inside when the Red Legion caged it. He'd talked to the Traveler - or rather, he had argued and yelled at it. But by the time the war ended, he had forged a friendly connection with the paracausal entity that few others dared try. Indeed, many Guardians looked at him askance and whispered that he was a fanatic.

Jayesh never denied this. How to explain his relationship with a god?

So as he lay there, pouring out his gratitude to the Traveler, he felt its Light touch him. It acknowledged the praise, and it was pleased.

"I'm not kissing up," he told it inside his head. "I really am thankful. I don't say thank you enough, so - thank you."

While they often communicated, the Traveler didn't always use words. Mostly it touched his Light, strengthening him. Sometimes it gave him mental images or visions. But tonight, he heard it laugh with the voices of many Guardians. "Guardian Jayesh. My faithful servant."

It portrayed itself as male to Jayesh because that was how he best communicated with it. The voice that spoke to him was like a loving father's. "I am sending you to the Reef. There is a task you must do there."

Jayesh lifted his head, gazing at the ceiling. "The Reef, Traveler? But ... last time I was there ..." Fear flashed through him, leaving cold sweat in its wake. He showed the Traveler his nightmare memories of Taken, and the horrifying chimera, the Voice of Riven, its jaws open.

The Traveler's Light embraced him. "Yes, my Guardian. You suffered greatly for my sake. But this time I have a different task for you - a task that only great Light can accomplish."

Jayesh lay there, silent, unwilling to ask more. He didn't want to go to the Reef again. He'd freeze in the cold wind that ripped through the barely-habitable asteroid field and the derelict spaceships that linked them. And the awful chimera had haunted his nightmares for months. Sometimes he dreamed he was back in its jaws, screaming in agony as the teeth pierced him.

And the Traveler wanted him to go back.

"I don't want to," he told it. "I'm afraid of what might happen."

He'd learned that the Traveler wanted him to be brutally honest with it. It more or less knew everything he was thinking, anyway. Not being human, it overlooked many nuances that would have offended a lesser being.

Its Light touched him like a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "You are my Guardian. I will empower you for this task. And the task is this."

It showed him a clear vision of an Awoken woman, with pale blue skin like starlight, long white hair, and glittering silver eyes.

"She has been Taken," the Traveler said.

The woman changed to a black shadow outlined in burning white. A blob of white on her forehead nearly obscured her features, but her jaw hung slack, her eyes gone dead and black, her fingers curled into claws.

Jayesh cringed. Taken were his particular terror.

"What do you expect me to do?" he thought. "You told me once that you didn't know if Taken people could ever be saved."

"That's what I want you to discover," the Traveler replied. "She was a servant of the Light, although not a Guardian. I will equip you with a transcendent blessing. Use it to free her from the power that indwells her."

Jayesh thought about this, tense and unwilling. He wanted to serve the Traveler, but it was asking him to face his greatest fear and attempt what, until now, had been considered impossible.

"Why now?" he asked. "Why do I have to do this now? Couldn't you try to save Taken people before this?"

"Consider the timeline," the Traveler replied. "Taken are a relatively recent invention by the Hive god Oryx. I have only lately awakened from my dormant state. It has taken time for me to study the Taken through my Guardians and ghosts. I have developed possible solutions to the problem. But my Guardians are my hands and feet in this matter. You are a healer. I am asking you to attempt to heal the gravest wound of all."

Put this way, Jayesh understood. A warm glow pervaded his being - the Traveler valued him enough to share its plans. He had always looked down on himself for preferring to heal. The Vanguard valued warriors, granting rewards and status according to who killed how much of what. The guy who stayed behind his fireteam, shielding, healing wounds that occurred faster than their ghosts could mend, or energizing his team - that sort of work didn't receive as much recognition. Of course, his fireteam praised him, but they were the only ones.

But restoring a person who had been Taken ...

His thoughts crawled back to one of his biggest failures - when a woman he had been trying to save had torn free of his grasp and thrown herself into a Maw. She had been Taken of her own free will. It still haunted him, usually late at night, when his treacherous mind called up all his failings and paraded them through his mind's eye.

Maybe Natasha could be saved, too.

Slowly he gathered his resolve. "I'll try, Traveler."

In response, extra Light trickled into him. But this was like another Seed of Light - a mote like the sun that he held in his heart. With it came words - a benediction - that would bestow the Light upon someone.

Imagining speaking a benediction over a Taken who was trying to rip his face off made him turn cold all over.

"My Light will be with you," the Traveler assured him. "Fear not."

Jayesh tried to respond that he wasn't afraid, that he'd be the first Guardian ever to pull a Taken back from the jaws of Darkness. But it would have been a lie. So he cuddled closer to Kari and tried not to shiver too much.

* * *

A week later, Jayesh received his next assignment from Ikora.

"Surprise," he told Kari, reading the message from his tablet. "She's sending me to the Reef. I get to mess around in the Dreaming City time loop. Go me."

"Oh, Jay." Kari put an arm around him. "It'll be all right. Guardians can get in and out of the time loop with minimal distortion. And hey, Madrid is there. Maybe he can help you out."

Jayesh gave her a sharp look.

Kari winced. "Or not."

Madrid had been the third member of their fire team, an expert Awoken Hunter, and a steadfast friend to them both. But witnessing the death of Cayde-6 had changed him. He had listened to the whispers of the Ahamkara, Riven, and had tried to feed Jayesh to a foul monster from the Ascendant Realm. He had also murdered the Awoken Prince, Uldren, in cold blood. He was serving a sentence of forced labor in the Dreaming City, a Guardian made to fight the same enemies every time the time loop reset. Nobody knew how long it would last.

Jayesh hoped he never laid eyes on Madrid again.

"I don't know how long I'll be gone," Jayesh said, closing his tablet and looking glum. "I'll be hunting for one particular Taken out of hordes of Taken. I have no guarantee the Darkness will even drop her into our reality. And then I have to identify her long enough to not kill her in self-defense. I don't know if I can do this. The Traveler's asking the impossible."

"Maybe for anyone else," Kari said, rubbing his back. "But I believe you can do it. Why else would the Traveler ask you?"

He leaned his head against hers and sighed deeply. "Kari ... I'm scared out of my mind."

She kept stroking him and said nothing.

Connor toddled up to them, holding up a toy car. "Da!" he exclaimed.

Jayesh picked him up. "Daddy's going on another trip, Con. Be good for your mama."

Connor sucked his thumb and regarded his father soberly. His ghost floated nearby, wearing a waterproof shell smeared with baby food, her expression one of constant longsuffering.

Jayesh hugged his son and his wife. "When I get back, I'm taking a month off. I miss you both too much." He didn't voice the tiny, nagging fear that maybe this time, he wouldn't come back - that somewhere out in the savage, lawless Reef, his Light would finally be quenched. That was one of the risks of being a Guardian and didn't bear mentioning.

"You'll do great, Jay," Kari told him. "Keep in touch while you're out there."

"I'll write you every day." He let Connor slide to the floor. Then he wrapped his arms around Kari and kissed her slowly and deeply. "I married you so we wouldn't have to be separated," he whispered. "And here we are, separated. It's not fair."

"I know," she whispered back. "I wish I could go. But Connor ..."

"I know." He held her for another moment, then released her with a sigh. "I'd better get going."

"Hey." Kari held out her hands. Her ghost transmatted her graviton lance into them. She held it out. "Take this. It'll remind you of me when you use it."

It was her favorite rifle, and it fired black holes. Jayesh was fond of it, too. He accepted it reverently. "I'll take perfect care of it, lovelight."

* * *

"I guess it's just you and me, Phoenix," he said to his ghost as he walked to the hanger.

"Just like the good old days," Phoenix replied, twirling his red and yellow shell. "Alone. Scared. People trying to kill us."

"Playing with Taken," Jayesh said. "Listening to the Traveler. The more things change, the more they stay the same."

Jayesh entered his ship, stashed his gear, then waited for takeoff clearance from Tower Control.

As he did, he thought about his conversation with Ikora, the Warlock Vanguard.

"I've had word from the Traveler," she had told him quietly. They had been alone in her office. Other Guardians still tended to treat Jayesh like a pariah for his claims about meeting the Traveler - and the following media campaign against him. But it spoke to Ikora, too, and she understood.

"It's sending you to the Reef to study Taken," Ikora went on, watching his face. "But I see that you already know."

"It told me," Jayesh replied. "I was just waiting for you to send me, officially."

Ikora had smiled. "This won't be an easy task, but I'm not throwing you to the wolves just yet. Rendezvous at the Dasa compound in Reefedge City. It's our only Guardian foothold in the Reef. The Dasas have years of experience with Taken and will help you. If you need a fireteam, they'll assign you one. But this may be a solo mission."

His dread must have shown on his face, because Ikora looked compassionate. "Don't underestimate yourself, Guardian. You've faced far worse things than a single Taken."

"There's no such thing as a single Taken," Jayesh had replied. "They run in packs."

"I know. And I still think you can handle it. I'm prepared to award triple the usual bounty for this mission. If we Guardians can steal the Taken from the Darkness, itself? That is a devastating weapon against our enemies."

While he was grateful for her confidence in him, and the extra bounty, Jayesh sat in his ship's cockpit, waiting for permission to take off, and didn't feel like he could handle this mission. Why was it that no matter how much he accomplished, or how much success he had, inside, he was still the same frightened young Guardian?

Phoenix floated beside him, ready to operate the ghost controls. Without a word being spoken, he turned and examined Jayesh's face. Then he flew up and leaned his shell against Jayesh's cheek in a silent expression of companionship. Jayesh cupped a hand around him and held him for a moment.

"I'm here, Jay," the ghost whispered to his mind through their bond.

"Thanks," Jayesh thought.

It was all that needed to be said. Ghost and Guardian trusted each other implicitly.


	2. Broken trust

It was an eleven hour flight to the Reef in the asteroid belt, even at near light speed. Earth was at an inconvenient spot in its orbit, and so was Mars. Their course wound through these obstacles, taking advantage of gravity wells to assist in course correction.

In between, Jayesh read a novel aloud to Phoenix. It was an old Golden Age thriller about a man being forced to answer a phone and commit whatever crime the voice told him to. It was exciting and suspenseful, ending at a satisfyingly explosive conclusion. The hours in flight passed quickly.

"You know, I could read the whole book myself in a few minutes," Phoenix said. "But there's just something so pleasant about being read to."

"Isn't it?" Jayesh grinned. "I've been reading children's books to Connor and I've developed a taste for it."

The computer pinged, signaling the end of their journey at last. Jayesh stowed his tablet and held on as the ship dropped from NLS with a lurch. The blur of light outside the windshield resolved into the jumbled rock and metal of the Reef.

"So, where is this Reefedge place?" Jayesh asked. "There's no cities on the Tangled Shore."

"Further in," Phoenix replied. "Closer to the Dreaming City planetoid. The solar lens keeps it warm back there. It's where the Awoken live and raise their families."

The solar lens was a great ring of rocks and ship parts, held in place by forces beyond Jayesh's understanding. Gravitational lensing focused the distant sun's light into a concentrated beam that warmed the otherwise chilly Reef.

"I still wonder how they built all this," Jayesh muttered.

"Two ways," Phoenix replied. "First, their tech is crazy advanced from thousands of years of compressed time in their homeworld. Second, Ahamkara wishes."

"I wonder if the curse on the Dreaming City is the payoff for all those wishes?" Jayesh mused, following his ghost's nav points through the clusters of rocks and dust. "Ahamkara always want payment, right?"

"They feed on the desire of the wisher," Phoenix replied. "It's why the Guardians exterminated them. Too dangerous."

"I'm glad they're gone," Jayesh muttered. "Except Riven. They killed her and she's still operating."

"Ahamkara don't die," Phoenix said. "Death just makes them harder to reach."

Jayesh didn't question this enigmatic statement because he didn't want to know.

They made their way through the Reef to an interior ring of asteroids, joined together in a torus-shaped planetoid. It rotated in the magnified sunlight, which granted it weather and seasons, and most of all, stability.

Jayesh orbited it twice before his scans locked on to the signal from the Dasa compound. It was low frequency and hard to detect, as if they were trying not to be noticed. But the voice that answered his hail was friendly enough. Air traffic control guided him in.

The atmosphere was so thin that reentry burn only lasted about half a minute. Jayesh swept in under minimal power and landed in a field assigned to jump ships. Several other ships were scattered around the field, all the sleek, fast jumpships that Guardians preferred. Only one ship was outfitted for combat. It sat alone at the far end of the field, its huge gun barrels gleaming under its wings.

Jayesh disembarked, and was amazed to find that it wasn't cold. The sunlight was warm on his face as he pulled off his helmet. The air felt thin, though, and carried the scent of strange trees and plants.

He walked toward a series of buildings in the distance, surrounded by a high stone wall. "That's the compound?" he said doubtfully. "Looks more like a rich man's estate."

"It is," Phoenix replied. "I looked it up before we left. When most of the Reef was Taken, the only Dasa left happened to be a Guardian. He's donated this place to the Vanguard."

"Now, there's a story and a half," Jayesh said. "Wouldn't the Vanguard get upset that a Guardian learned about their past?"

"Doesn't sound like they had much say," Phantom replied. "The Reef found him."

The iron gates stood open. Jayesh entered the grounds, which were several acres of grassy parkland and scattered, graceful trees. He followed the gravel drive up to the compound itself. This was a mansion in the artistic Awoken architecture, all white stone, flowing arches, and tall, narrow windows.

The front door stood open, so Jayesh peeked in. Inside was a grand entry hall with a ceiling two stories high, blue crystal chandeliers that glowed with their own light, and a glittering marble floor. Guardians moved here and there, going about their business, their rough clothing and armor out of place against such splendor.

Jayesh made it to the middle of the entry before he realized he had no idea where to go. He stood there, staring around in vain for a sign of some kind. "Phoenix, help?"

"Um ... I can map the floor plan," the ghost replied. "But I don't know what any of it is. This place is huge."

As Jayesh stood there, wondering who to ask for directions, another ghost flew up to them. "Hello! New here?"

"Yes," Jayesh said, taking in the forest green shell and the bright, cheerful eye. "I've an assignment to speak with the Dasas about a mission."

"The Taken mission?" the ghost said cheerfully. "Better you than me! Come this way."

The ghost led them to the right, then along a hall and up a staircase to a series of offices. "Mind you," the ghost said, "it's been a while since my Guardian has seen much action, but we're not fond of Taken. Nobody in the Reef is."

"Who is your Guardian?" Jayesh asked.

"His name is Ferral," said the ghost proudly. "He's a hunter, and the best one I know."

The ghost led them down a hallway to a door at the far end. A sign on the door said _Kymil Elvaris Dasa_.

"Just a minute," said the ghost, and phased through the door.

Jayesh stood on one foot. "This is the boss of this place," he muttered to Phoenix. "I thought Taken were scary. They're nothing compared to ..." He gestured at a painting on the wall that looked old and very expensive. "You know. Wealthy society."

"Eyes up, Guardian," Phoenix told him. "You're the equal of anyone here. If you start the unworthy worm thing, I'll scream. In your head. Where you can't shut me up."

Jayesh tried to stand straighter, tried to look imposing and important.

The green ghost reappeared through the door. "Come in. They're expecting you."

Jay turned the knob and went in.

Inside was an office three times the size of Jayesh's apartment. It had several desks with the latest computer equipment, wide windows with views of the surrounding hills, and alcoves in the walls containing odd crystals and artifacts. Several Awoken worked at the desks. In fact, everyone in here was Awoken, all blue skin and glowing eyes. Jayesh felt very out of place and human.

A man rose from the nearest desk and came to greet him. His skin was a subtle shade of blue, and his dark hair had white streaks in it. He wore a black suit with scarlet trim, and altogether intimidated Jayesh as much as Commander Zavala. This must be Kymil Elvaris Dasa.

"Ah, Guardian Jayesh," said Dasa. "Forgive me for not meeting you downstairs, but you got here sooner than I expected. Was Banner polite?"

The green ghost floated at his shoulder.

"Of course I was polite," he snapped.

Jayesh looked at the ghost, then Dasa. "He said your name was Ferral."

Dasa rolled his eyes. "Two names, two lives, two identities. Come this way, where we can talk." He crossed the room to a side door, which he opened and waved Jayesh through.

Inside was an actual apartment, with furniture that looked safe to touch. An Awoken woman sat at a table with three older teenagers and a ghost, all of them bent over books and tablets. She glanced up as they entered. "Business, Ferral?"

"Just headed for the inner sanctum," Dasa replied. He led Jayesh down a hall to a much smaller office, this one with a table and comfortable armchairs, and a floor to ceiling bookcase crammed to overflowing.

"Much better," Dasa said, flinging himself into an armchair. "All that stuff in the outer office is to impress business people. Guardians get the good chairs."

Jayesh sat down and approved at once. He was cautiously warming to this strange, dual-natured man. "How do I address you?"

"Ferral," the Awoken replied firmly. "My ghost named me at my resurrection. I'm only Kymil Elvaris Dasa to the Awoken. Don't let the mansion get to you. My family were a bunch of pretentious assholes."

He talked like a Guardian, too. Jayesh relaxed. "I'm supposed to try to restore a Taken woman."

"Ikora told me," Ferral replied. "Honestly? I think it's insane. But it would be wonderful if you could pull it off. The Dasa clan were Taken. They manifest sometimes to give me bad business advice. Shooting them only makes them go away for a while." He patted a sidearm under his jacket that Jayesh hadn't noticed. "If you could bring them back, well, I suppose we could all murder each other properly. I'm the black sheep, you know."

Jayesh laughed. "I don't know how successful I'll be. Not only do I have to locate this girl, I have to speak a benediction over her without having my limbs torn off."

"You'll need help," Ferral replied. His gaze flicked over Jayesh's robe. "Warlock, right. How about a Hunter? I have one here today."

Jayesh shrugged. "Sure. I can work with Hunters."

Madrid had been a Hunter. Jayesh had got along with him, until ...

"Good," Ferral said. "Now, here's a map of the Dreaming City." His ghost projected a holographic map in midair. "The Ascendant Realm protrudes at these five points. The Taken get in from there. You'll want to patrol those points. Feel free to jump back and forth between realities. Guardians can do it, but the Corsairs have trouble."

"Thanks," Jayesh said, feeling slightly less overwhelmed. "A plan of attack makes me feel better."

Ferral nodded. "Granted, it won't be fun. The time loop means that the same batch of idiots show up every three weeks. But if you miss your target the first time, she'll be back. Count the days carefully. My ghost will give yours the app."

Jayesh watched Banner transmit Phoenix the information via a scan beam. "There's an app for the Dreaming City curse?"

"There's apps for everything," Ferral said with a grin. "Ghost-made, so they work super well. Watch the time loop. I've had Guardians lose track of time in there and ride multiple loops by accident. People get obsessed." He hesitated. "You'll see Corsairs ... who die. Over and over. Not like Guardians."

This was an effect of the loop Jayesh hadn't thought of. He grimaced.

"Yeah," Ferral said, making a face. "All right, come with me. We'll find you a hunting partner."

Jayesh accompanied Ferral through the mansion-compound. It had three wings which had been devoted to the three Guardian disciplines. Their ghosts chatted as Ferral talked to Jayesh.

"I mostly fly a desk, now," Ferral told him. "Other Guardians get the interesting jobs. Let me tell you, losing the Light was no fun. Every Fallen and Taken out here went crazy, sensing it. We holed up here and barely rode it out. How'd you fare?"

Jayesh swallowed. "Well, uh. I sort of climbed up into the Traveler and got trapped inside the cage."

Ferral laughed. "Don't tell me you're the one the City media hated so much."

He led Jayesh into the Hunter wing. The walls were wood-paneled, and the furniture was draped in animal pelts. It smelled of woodsmoke and tobacco. Only one Hunter was there, sitting in a chair with his back to them.

"I'm afraid so," Jayesh said. "The Cult of Osiris really had it in for me."

Ferral sized him up. "So, did you really climb into the Traveler?"

"Yes."

"What was it like?"

Jayesh scrutinized Ferral, trying to decide how much to tell. Ferral's posture was relaxed and open, conveying honest interest.

"There was a lot of Light," Jayesh said. "It spoke to me, portrayed itself as another Guardian. We argued about Ghaul."

Ferral grinned and nodded. "Ghaul. I'm glad it paid attention. What happened to you when it awoke?"

"It almost killed me," Jayesh replied. "It shielded me, and my ghost and I were still nearly erased."

"Huh," said Ferral. "Wish I'd had the spine to try that. I always believed the stories, you know, about how the Traveler's power would kill anybody who tried to get in."

Jayesh shrugged. "I was still in training and hadn't heard the stories."

"Still in -" Ferral stopped and gave Jayesh a piercing look. "You've been a Guardian for four years?"

Jayesh nodded.

Ferral's expression changed to bewilderment. "Four years ... and Ikora sends you ... to restore a Taken. She didn't send a senior Guardian with you?"

"Just me."

Ferral turned away, rubbing a hand across his face. He didn't seem to know how to take this.

Jayesh shriveled a little inside. People always reacted this way when they found out his age. He tried to reassure himself that he'd had lots of experience, that he was fully qualified, that the Traveler, itself, had called him. But part of him wondered if it had made a mistake.

Beside him, Phoenix picked up on his embarrassment. The red ghost flew in front of Ferral and glared at him. "My Guardian can stand toe to toe with anyone, even centuries-old Guardians! I know he's young. But he helped save the City's population from a plague after the war. He fought to save the Reef from the Scorn and Uldren, and he killed the Voice of Riven. Don't you dare put him down."

"Phoenix, that's enough," Jayesh said sharply.

His ghost returned to his spot at his shoulder, looking satisfied.

Ferral's grin returned. "Your ghost sticks up for you, anyway. We'll give your crazy mission a chance. Hey, Guardian," he said, turning to the lone hunter in the chair. "I've got a warlock here who needs a partner."

"No," said the hunter without turning.

Ferral crossed the room to him. "The kid needs a partner. I know you're good. I'll pay a bounty."

The hunter rose to his feet and pushed back his hood. Madrid's yellow eyes met Jayesh's brown ones. The hunter looked more gaunt than the last time Jayesh had seen him, with hollows in his cheeks and a strained look to the Light that swirled beneath his skin. His indigo hair had grown long and hung in his eyes, as if Madrid had forgotten about his appearance.

For a long second they stared in silence. Then Madrid turned to Ferral. "Money doesn't enter into it. He doesn't want to work with me. Ask him."

Ferral turned to Jayesh in confusion.

Jayesh was speechless. Madrid had been sitting there the whole time, listening to him spill his guts. Of course, Madrid knew it all, anyway, but still. Jayesh raced over the conversation in his mind, trying to decide if he'd said anything about Madrid that he shouldn't have. No, he hadn't mentioned his fireteam at all.

Ferral broke into his thoughts. "Do you two know each other?"

"Yes," Jayesh said slowly, stalling for time. "But it's been a while."

"I'll say," Madrid said.

Jayesh tried to decide what to do. He could refuse to have Madrid as a partner. But he needed a partner for this mission, and Madrid was a consummate fighter and sniper. He also knew the Dreaming City. Jayesh didn't.

Madrid had been his friend before the voices got to him. Could that friendship be restored? At the moment, Jayesh was afraid to turn his back on the Hunter. He remembered all too clearly the shock of being stabbed from behind, then forcibly dragged toward the hungry monster.

Madrid had apologized, later. But Jayesh's trust had been more than broken - it had been ground to powder and scattered to the four winds.

"Any voices?" Jayesh asked.

"No," Madrid said.

There was another long pause.

Ferral stood there, waiting awkwardly. "I guess ... this was a bad idea. Give me a few days, I can find someone else."

"Wait," Jayesh said. "It's all right. Madrid, I need a partner to hunt Taken. I have a mission to redeem one."

Madrid laughed without smiling. "Ha. Impossible."

"By myself, yes."

Madrid's posture was guarded, cautious, half-turned as if to leave. But he slowly turned back toward his former friend. "We could try it. No hard feelings if you cut and run."

"No hard feelings," Jayesh agreed.

"Great," Ferral said. "I'll register you as a temporary fireteam. Hopefully you won't have to ride the time loop more than once."

"It's due to reset tomorrow," Madrid said. He gave Jayesh an ugly smile. "You're about to see what it looks like when a whole city is Taken."


	3. First day of the last day

"Phoenix, what have I done?" Jayesh said in the privacy of their ship. He and Madrid were making the short flight to the Dreaming City, passing through ripples of atmosphere that spread through space in layers of mist.

"I don't know what you've done," Phoenix said bitterly. "He tried to kill you double-dead, Jay. I went with you down that thing's gullet. It's not something you forget." He shuddered in midair and hid himself between Jayesh's shoulder and the pilot's seat.

The memory remained a black horror in Jayesh's mind, like a gaping wound that never healed. He tried to pull his thoughts away from it. "Logically, I understand that Madrid was hearing Riven's whispers and it was driving him mad. She did the same thing to Uldren. But Madrid recovered. He even got a seed of Light, later. But ... I just can't get past what he did, emotionally." He gripped the flightstick and watched his instruments.

"You're a bigger person than I am, Jay," Phoenix said, his voice muffled by the seat. "You're trying to forgive him. Me? I can't. Not right now. He still has that look."

Jayesh had noticed that-the deadness in Madrid's eyes. It was as if his soul had died inside him, but the body lived on, going through the motions without realizing that all purpose had ceased.

"He still has a ghost, right?" Jayesh asked.

"Yes," Phoenix replied, emerging from hiding and returning to his job as copilot. "I detected Rose's presence. She was phased. You know how shy she is."

Rose had gotten comfortable enough to come out when Jayesh was around. Now she wasn't.

Nausea touched Jayesh's stomach. "I was afraid I'd have to shoot her. Remember?"

"I remember," Phoenix muttered. "I hated it. And I hated you for thinking it. I know we were scared that Madrid had fallen to Darkness, but murder is murder."

"I'm glad I didn't," Jayesh whispered. "Light, I'm so glad. I couldn't have lived with the guilt."

They emerged from the clouds and saw the Dreaming City in the distance. It seemed to float in space by itself, mountains ringing buildings and towers that seemed to stand right out into space. It was beautiful and impossible.

"That's got to be made by wish," Jayesh said. "It wouldn't have gravity or atmosphere otherwise."

"I think you're right," Phoenix said, gazing at it. "And - oh!"

A ripple passed through the ship, making the frame waver as if seen through water. It was accompanied by a subsonic rumble that rattled Jayesh's bones. Phoenix's eye filled with static for a moment.

"And I think we just entered the time loop," Jayesh gasped. "It feels foul."

"Another wish," Phoenix said. "I can tell. It felt so wrong."

"It's certainly powerful," Jayesh said. He anxiously felt for his connection with the Traveler and found his Light intact. He had been places where he had lost that connection. He couldn't face the challenges that awaited in the Dreaming City without his Light.

Madrid's ship swerved to the left, and Jayesh followed him down. There was a rocky plain lapped by mist where Guardians landed their ships. Everywhere else was too mountainous and rocky.

As they landed, Jayesh noticed black dots flying by his windshield. They didn't stick, just flew about in the air, swirling against the glass. "Is that ash?"

Phoenix scanned it through the glass. Then he recoiled, his segments twitching back and forth. "They're blights."

"Blights?" Jayesh said blankly. "But they're the size of raindrops. Blights are big gross Darkness spheres."

"Maybe they're baby ones," Phoenix said. "But I'm getting a positive energy match. Blights. Millions of them."

Jayesh watched the black dots swirl, trying to grasp the magnitude of a corruption that filled the very air. "What if I inhale one?"

"Wear your helmet," Phoenix advised. "At least until we know if they harm Guardians."

Jayesh pulled his helmet on, then had his ghost transmat him outside, so he wouldn't have to risk opening a door and letting the blights inside. He took Kari's graviton lance with him.

He stepped into knee-deep mist. Madrid stood nearby, also wearing his helmet.

"Welcome to the Dreaming City," Madrid said, spreading his arms. "Where the curse never ends, and Guardians are second class citizens." He tapped a ring around his upper arm. It looked like a warlock bond-then Jayesh realized it was a prisoner's bracelet. It had four lights on it, currently extinguished.

"This makes sure I leave for no more than twenty-four hours," Madrid said. "Otherwise it feeds me arc bolts. Unpleasant." He pointed at Jayesh. "And before you make any smart remarks about what I did, look at this arm band. I'm serving time for it all. Don't make it worse."

Jayesh bit his tongue. Madrid waded through the mist toward higher ground, and Jayesh followed in silence. The black motes swirled around them like dust.

They climbed the hill, and the city came into view in the distance - graceful, flowing arches, and white stone trimmed with blue, like the Dasa compound. A single tower dominated the skyline, stretching up through the atmosphere.

But smears of black corruption engulfed it all. The tower bulged with blights the size of colony ships. Black energy arched out of them, like magnetic bands from the surface of the sun. Smaller blights were attached to lesser buildings, trailing blackness over the walls like oozing tar. The surrounding trees were withered, half their leaves burned brown.

"This is Riven's curse?" Jayesh exclaimed, staring. "The city is completely foul!"

"Three weeks," Madrid said, gazing at it with his arms folded. "Despite our best efforts, the Darkness seeps in and eats the Dreaming City in three weeks. And then time rewinds to the beginning of the three weeks. I don't think that part is Riven's doing. The Vex control time, not Ahamkara. But there's no Vex in the Dreaming City."

Jayesh gestured at the blights in the air. "Look at it. It's all Taken. That can only be from the Hive gods."

"That's my thought," Madrid agreed. "But most people blame Riven. Or Mara Sov, even. That's her sanctum, Eleusinia." He nodded at the tower so infected with blights. "It's ruined, now. She'll never return to it. It was her throne world."

Jayesh blinked, wondering if he had heard right. "The Queen of the Awoken has a throne world? Like the Hive? Built out of death?"

Madrid nodded. "You'll find out more than you wanted to know while you're here." He faced Jayesh. "So. You're hunting a single Taken among hordes of them. How do you plan to do this?"

Jayesh showed him the map with the spots where Taken crossed from reality to reality. "I plan to patrol those and watch what comes out, at first."

Madrid sounded sarcastic behind his face shield. "Who's this all-important person you're trying to rescue?"

"All I have is a picture in my head," Jayesh replied. "But it's an Awoken woman with long white hair. She was a servant of the Light before she was Taken."

"Uh huh," Madrid said. "You have some freaky warlock magic to use on her?"

"A benediction," Jayesh said, his heart sinking. Madrid's tone conveyed such scorn for everything Jayesh was trying to do. He'd never been like this before. Maybe the man who had befriended Jayesh was truly dead.

"Well then," Madrid said. "Get out your sparrow and let's get moving. There's only a few hours left - the curse resets at sunset."

Jayesh had Phoenix summon his sparrow, and followed Madrid's lead in silence.

* * *

Madrid hadn't seen Jayesh since they had parted in the Reef. It had been more than a year - nearly two, if he was counting the time right. The time loops made this hard. Madrid had settled into a dreary existence of fighting the same enemies over and over. He befriended the Awoken soldiers - the Corsairs - only to watch them die to the rampaging monsters. Then time reset, and they were alive again. They had full knowledge of how they were about to die, but the time loop forced them into the same actions, leading to the same outcome. Madrid had been trying to save two of his Corsair friends for eight time loops now, and failed every time.

Then Jayesh showed up - the friend he had failed the hardest. He didn't want to see the glint of blue Light in Jayesh's eyes, didn't want to speak to him, didn't want to remember flinging his friend to the chimera. The voices had cost him the friendship of both Jayesh and Kari. Jayesh was trying to make amends, because he was like that. But Kari would never forgive Madrid.

Seeing Jayesh brought the shame and despair all back. Worse was seeing the guarded distrust in his face.

_You are a bigger monster than Riven._

This thought had haunted Madrid since he had pulled the trigger on Uldren.

He didn't know how to talk to Jayesh. Simple conversation about the mission became one barb after another, hurting his friend even more. But Madrid couldn't stop. His loathing of himself became loathing of the man he had wronged.

Rose didn't speak to him about it. They were down to the minimum amount of communication-she answered his questions and that was all. He felt her suffering, sometimes, when he let himself. He still loved his ghost, somewhere, beneath layers of grief and anger and shame. His life was nothing but existence, attempting to atone for his crimes. And he could never atone for them. With each restart of the time loop, he grew more certain of his fate. The rest of his immortal life would be spent in the Dreaming City, trying to right the wrongs he had committed-against his friends, against the Sovs, against himself.

He led Jayesh to the first spot where Taken emerged from the Ascendant Realm. It was down in a little valley, hardly bigger than a cleft in the rocks. A crowd of Taken milled about there, shrieking and hissing.

Madrid and Jayesh crouched on the rocks and studied them. Just from the way they moved, Madrid knew they were Hive thralls and Vex goblins.

"I don't see any humans," Jayesh whispered, sighting through his rifle scope for a closer look at the demons.

"Not here," Madrid muttered. He summoned a Light grenade and whistled through his teeth. The Taken looked up. Madrid tossed the grenade into the middle of them and ducked. Jayesh did, too.

The grenade erupted in a flash of blinding blue. The Taken screeched and lost their footing in reality, warping back into the outer Darkness.

"You do this often?" Jayesh asked.

"Every three weeks," Madrid said, mounting his sparrow again. "Same gang. Same grenade."

He led the way to another thin point in realities. This was the middle of a white stone bridge between two chunks of rock. A river of mist flowed beneath. Madrid happened to know that falling through that mist meant a tumble straight through the planetoid and into vacuum. He warned Jayesh, who nodded in silence.

They waited at the far end of the bridge, hidden behind a statue of a woman with a sphere in her hands. Black motes swirled around them. Madrid didn't even notice them anymore. They were an annoyance, like too many flies on a summer's day.

Footsteps crunched on the dead grass. Madrid looked up, then swallowed a groan. Picking his way toward them was a young human in mis-matched armor. He wore a warlock robe over a Titan's breastplate and greaves, with a hunter's cloak. His skin was so fair, he looked sickly. He wore no face covering, as if the blights held no fear for him.

"Madrid! Hello!" he exclaimed. "Stalking your prey? And who's this?"

"Don't-" Madrid began.

But Jayesh, always friendly, held out a hand. "Guardian Jayesh. Are you a Guardian?"

"No," said the stranger cheerfully. "But they have entertaining garments, don't they? I'm Limerick."

"Limerick," Jayesh said, puzzled. "The kind of poem?"

"Two sets of repeating lines," Limerick said, "and the final line repeats the cadence of the first two. There was a Guardian from the City, who thought himself quite witty. He loosed his powers, which toppled whole towers, and found the damage pretty."

"That's terrible," Jayesh said with a grin.

"Isn't it, though?" Limerick said. "And accurate. You must be new. I know everyone in the Dreaming City, and I don't know you."

"Just arrived," Jayesh said. "I'm looking for-"

Madrid elbowed him, hard. "We're busy, Limerick. Go away."

Limerick's eyes brightened. He had strange eyes - somewhere between yellow and orange. "Do you _wish_ me to leave you alone, Madrid?"

Madrid ground his teeth. "No. Fine. Pester us all day."

Limerick laughed and snapped his fingers. He had long, curved nails. "Almost had you that time. I'll feed on you yet." He turned and walked off, his cloak billowing behind him.

"What - what was he?" Jayesh whispered, all friendliness erased by panic. "Why did he say that?"

"He's an Ahamkara," Madrid muttered. "May the Light burn him to ash. Showed up early on in the time loop. Wanders around, tries to trick people into wishing for things."

Jayesh stared after the departing figure, clutching his rifle. "Why doesn't someone kill him?"

"Because that's what he wants. He spent a whole loop trying to get someone to shoot him. But we're wise to that, now. He wants to cross over and be with Riven."

In the middle of the bridge, reality warped and shimmered. Taken began dripping through and landing on the stone, shuddering and wobbling. Jayesh raised his graviton lance and watched through the scope.

"I thought the Ahamkara were extinct," Jayesh muttered.

"So we thought," Madrid replied. "As it turns out, they can change shapes. Some of them took human shape and hid. But Limerick doesn't care if we know what he is. He's feeding on our desire to win, to end the time loop. And if we kill him, he wins. We don't know what to do."

Jayesh lowered his rifle with a sigh. "No humans in this bunch, either."

"You do the honors, then," Madrid said.

Jayesh shot each Taken through the spot of white on its face. They charged up the bridge toward them, but Jayesh picked them off until all were gone. Madrid watched, silently approving of his improved speed and accuracy.

Jayesh lowered his rifle, then looked over his shoulder. "Where did Limerick go?"

"Probably off to annoy someone else," Madrid said. "Come on, next weak point is this way."

The two Guardians rode their sparrows down a curving cliff path, through a vaulted tunnel with sparkling crystal walls, and out into a series of gardens. A shallow pond glimmered in the center of many flower beds and blooming shrubbery. A waterfall fed the pond, and stone benches were scattered here and there, where one might sit and enjoy the gardens.

Jayesh made a small, pleased sound.

"Don't get attached," Madrid said. "Every foul thing in the Dreaming City parades through the Gardens of Esila. It's like they know it's supposed to be a place of refreshment."

"The Darkness always wants to twist and destroy anything good," Jayesh muttered.

They hid behind a couple of decorative planters and waited. Jayesh gazed around, drinking in the beauty around them. "Whose gardens are these? Someone cares for them."

Madrid shrugged. "Esila's? Nobody cares for them now that the curse is active. I never see anybody out here." He'd also been through them so often, he didn't notice their beauty anymore. It annoyed him that Jayesh did, even though it was a silly thing to be annoyed about.

"Did I tell you that we had a child?" Jayesh said suddenly.

Madrid looked at him, startled. "You and Kari?"

"Yes. His name is Connor, and he's a Guardian."

Guardians hardly ever had children, and they were hardly ever Guardians, too. Madrid marveled at this. He even thought to his ghost, "What are the odds of that?"

"Very long odds," Rose replied. "But ... it's Jayesh and Kari. Are you surprised?"

"Not really."

To Jayesh, Madrid said, "So that's why Kari's not here. I thought you two had split or something."

Jayesh's hands shifted on his rifle in sudden temper. He didn't answer for a long moment, as if working to control himself. When he spoke, his voice was even. "We mean more to each other than that, Madrid."

A gang of Taken oozed into reality in the middle of the pond, their limbs smoking and sparking where they touched the water. Madrid looked them over and shook his head, but Jayesh studied them closely before he was satisfied. No humans.

They shot the demons, which charged them, leaping over flower beds and withering anything they touched. Madrid introduced three Taken to his combat knife, while Jayesh punched them with fire.

When all the demons had been dispatched, Madrid said, "I suppose you left Kari home to raise the kid."

"She wanted to," Jayesh said through his teeth. "Don't lecture me. I know how people think."

"Don't you think it's hard on her?" Madrid said, rising to his feet and leading the way out of the gardens.

Jayesh followed him. "It's a different kind of job. She loves it. Why do you care, anyway?"

Madrid didn't answer. He couldn't explain how the idea of his former friends moving on with their lives rankled. He was chained to a time loop, living the same three weeks of failure over and over. Meanwhile, Jayesh and Kari had turned out so normal. Compared to most Guardians, normal was rare and strange. To Madrid, who had all but given up hope, hearing about life beyond the time loop was torment. He wanted it and knew he'd never have it.

They rode their sparrows down to the shore of a lake of mist. Taken appeared out in the mist and charged ashore, appearing with a shriek that gave away their position.

It was harder to get a good look at these Taken, but Jayesh and Madrid looked at each one before they killed it. There was one human among the aliens, but it had been male.

After that, Madrid led Jayesh through a series of caverns to a building with vaulted obsidian ceilings and walls, the floor made of shimmering crystal. The Taken emerged from a certain wall.

"This is called Harbinger's Seclude," Madrid said. "It used to be a place of prayer and reflection. Now?" He dispatched two Taken, his scout rifle's bark awakening ear-shattering echoes. "Now it's where dark things lurk."

"Always the sacred places," Jayesh muttered. He waved away the ever-present blights and squinted at the crowd of demons sliding toward them across the crystal floor.

No woman was among these Taken, either. Once they had been dispatched, Madrid jerked his head. "Come on outside. The curse is about to reset."

The two Guardians returned outside. The blights in the air had given the sunset an orange, polluted look. Madrid leaned on a low stone wall and looked across the withered trees and stained roofs to the Elusinea tower in the distance. The blights covered it like tumors. Jayesh waited beside him in silence, but he summoned his ghost. The two of them watched.

This bothered Madrid, too. He hadn't invited Rose out in weeks. Phoenix was still in the same red and yellow shell, but he was clean and polished. Madrid couldn't even remember what shell Rose was wearing.

Madrid held out one hand and thought, "Rosie?"

She appeared over his palm. That was right-he'd equipped her with her rose petal shell again because of the scanner upgrades built into it. It had collected dust in the corners, and there was a smear across Rose's eye lens. She blinked up at him, a little sadly.

He pulled her close and cleaned her eye with the edge of his cloak.

"I'm sorry," he thought.

"It's all right," she told him.

Even when he neglected her, she forgave him. He gazed into her eye, its lens now polished clean. "I'll try to do better."

She emoted a smile.

The ghosts and Guardians watched as the sun in its magnifier ring slipped below the horizon. The shadows of the trees and mountains grew longer and longer.

A wave rolled through the world. Madrid saw the edge as it passed. On one side was deep orange atmosphere, blights, blackness staining everything, the vegetation dying. On the other side, the light was deep blue. The buildings were white and clean, Eleusinia untouched, the lines of the tower clearly defined against the sky. The trees were fresh and green.

Jayesh grunted and steadied himself against the wall. The force of the time wave rocked Madrid, too, making his stomach pitch as if he stood on a wildly tilting ship in a rough sea.

The world calmed. The air was clear, free of blights. Birds sang their last songs all around.

"This is what it used to look like?" Jayesh exclaimed, gazing around in amazement.

"Welcome to the beginning," Madrid said. "You've seen the end. No matter how many times we ride the loop, the Dreaming City falls."

Jayesh gazed at the tower for a moment. He pulled off his helmet and drew a long breath of the clean air. "Madrid, I'm here to save one person. Not the Dreaming City. But ... I'm hoping that by saving one person, that will give us the edge we need to end the cycle."

Madrid looked at Rose. She floated beside his left shoulder, observing in silence. "What do you think?" he asked her aloud, for Jayesh's benefit.

"The answer is simple, not complex," she replied. "But I don't know it."

"What does that mean?" Phoenix asked.

Rose rotated her segments back and forth, as if thinking. "We've been in this time loop so long, sometimes I sense things. Minds and secrets. But I can't reach them. I don't want to reach them."

Madrid stared at his ghost. She had never told him any of that. But then, he hadn't asked.

"Is it safe to stay in our ships for the night?" Jayesh asked.

Madrid nodded. "Go to orbit, or the Dasa compound, if you can spare the fuel. The Dreaming City isn't safe. We're back to the first week, when the Scorn show up."

Jayesh made a face. "The Scorn? Undead Fallen?"

"That's them. No Barons to keep them in check, but Fikrul keeps raising more."

"The Archon?" Jayesh asked. "I thought we killed him."

"We did," Madrid said wearily. "Uldren wished him to life, and Fikrul keeps resurrecting himself. We've killed him so many times. He just comes back and raises a thousand Scorn at once."

Jayesh's look of stunned confusion matched the way Madrid felt about the whole Dreaming City curse.


	4. Conversations

The Guardians returned to their ships for the night. Madrid slept in orbit, but his ship was a cruiser with a decent-sized cabin. Jayesh's jumpship had barely enough room for one pilot and his gear. He returned to Reefedge and the Dasa compound.

Two Fallen guards stood at the mansion's doors after dark. Jayesh eyed them nervously as he approached, wondering whether to fire on them.

"Guardian?" one of the aliens said. It opened the door and beckoned with one of its four arms.

"Thank you," Jayesh said, taken aback. "Uh ... you're friendly to Guardians?"

Both Eliksni studied him. "We serve the House of Dasa," one said.

"Right," Jayesh said, edging between them. "I'll just ... go inside, now."

The aliens watched him as he passed. Jayesh held his breath until he was safely indoors and the door had closed between him and the aliens.

"Ferral has Eliksni on his staff?" Jayesh thought to Phoenix.

"This place keeps getting more interesting," Phoenix replied.

The warlock wing of the compound had once been the library. The main room had floor to ceiling bookcases with thousands of books on the shelves. Many adjoining rooms had been converted to quarters for visiting Guardians.

An Awoken girl showed him to one such room. "I have to clean these rooms," she told him, "so don't mess it up."

"You won't even know I was here," Jayesh promised.

She left with a skeptical sniff.

The room had a bed, a nightstand, and a tiny desk with a chair. The only restroom was at the end of the hall. But it was better than sleeping in the cockpit of his ship, so Jayesh didn't complain.

He stripped off his heavy armored robe and sat in his undershirt on the bed, typing a letter to Kari on his tablet. He detailed everything that had happened, from his arrival, to meeting Madrid, to experiencing the time loop.

"It's so overwhelming, lovelight," he wrote. "I wish you were here to help me make sense of this. Madrid's ghost, Rose, was saying such strange things. I'm afraid of what might happen to Phoenix if I stay here too long. I hope I can locate this Taken woman tomorrow, do my job, and come home. I already miss you so much."

He signed it and sent it off through the network. It would take all night for the signal to reach Earth, and another day for her response to reach him.

He looked up to see Phoenix floating a foot away, watching his face.

"What?" Jayesh asked, putting his tablet away.

"You're sad and lonely," Phoenix replied. "It makes me sad, too."

Jayesh sighed and dug out a ration pack. "You know me too well, little light." He ate mechanically, staring into space, his thoughts jumping from things he had seen that day to things he had read, to other encounters with Taken, to daydreams about what Kari and Connor were doing at that moment.

He looked up to see Phoenix still watching him. The ghost hung in the air, tilted a little downward, looking dejected.

"What's the matter?" Jayesh asked.

Phoenix looked down. "Did you see Rose?"

"Yes. She looked fine to me."

"She was dirty," Phoenix whispered. "Madrid hasn't been taking care of her. Rose is such a sweet, caring ghost. She's been through so much, having to watch her Guardian spiral. And he's neglecting her." Phoenix's voice was unsteady, as if he might burst into tears at any moment.

Jayesh bowed his head for a long moment. "There's not much I can do for her, Phoenix. That's between them."

"I know!" Phoenix wailed suddenly. "Madrid's worse than last time! And he's even hurting his ghost! And he'll hurt you! And this curse is horrible and that time wave hurt me and oh, Jay -" He flew up and hid his eye against Jayesh's shoulder.

"Hey now." Jayesh gently lifted the ghost and cradled him in the crook of his arm. "You didn't tell me the time wave hurt you."

The blue eye looked up at him, flickering. "It did," Phoenix whispered. "There were things in it. Things with eyes. They pulled and stung as they went by. Jay, I want to go home."

Jayesh stroked the red and yellow shell. "The Traveler sent us here, remember? I can't just leave."

Phoenix's eye flicked off for a moment. "I know. I can be brave. I have to be brave."

"My brave ghost." Jayesh set him on his pillow and lay down, pulling the heavy blanket over himself. He lay there, looking at Phoenix. "The Tangled Shore was way worse than the Dreaming City. I think we'll get used to it. It's a beautiful place, even if it is cursed."

Phoenix snuggled up until his shell touched Jayesh's forehead. "If you can do this, I can, too. It just shocked me so much, seeing Rose like that. Madrid used to love her. And now ..."

"Madrid is a prisoner," Jayesh said in a low voice. "And he hates it. I can see it in the way he carries himself. He's the type who needs his freedom. It's why he's a hunter. So, being chained to the Dreaming City like this is killing him. I wonder if I could do anything to lighten his sentence?"

"Ask for an audience with Mara Sov?" Phoenix said. "Like that will ever happen."

Jayesh lay there in silence, thinking about this. "I can't change how he killed Uldren. That's the crime he's being punished for. But ... I can ... try ... to forgive him for what he did to me."

"Can you?" Phoenix muttered.

Jayesh remembered the burning tentacles curling around him, and shuddered. "I don't know. I wish I could just ... forget."

"Me, too," Phoenix replied.

Jayesh dozed off. Phoenix listened to his breathing grow deep and even. But the ghost was too distraught for sleep. He pinged the Light network that all ghosts shared. "Banner, are you here?"

"Yep," came the reply. "Ferral's burning the midnight oil. What's up?"

Phoenix told him of their experiences in the Dreaming City. "Do you ever feel like you might let your Guardian down? Like, you're incapable of facing the things you have to face?"

"Oh, Light," Banner sighed. "That's how I felt when we found one of the Iron Lords eaten up with SIVA. He was just ... hanging from the ceiling in cords of nanites, and he was still alive. I wanted to run away so badly. But Ferral stood his ground, fought him and mercy killed him. Horrible thing to have to do."

Phoenix told him about the Chimera. Banner listened sympathetically.

"I have to be courageous," Phoenix concluded. "My Guardian needs me. But I'm so scared."

"It's all right to be scared," Banner told him quietly. "When you were looking for your Guardian, you never think about the places they'll take you. The things you'll go through."

"No," Phoenix murmured. "It took me so long to find Jayesh. And he'd been murdered. He's actually had flashbacks of it."

"Murdered? Really?" Banner said. "Ferral served as one of Uldren's Crows. Died in the line of duty before I found him."

"Jayesh was killed by his own brother," Phoenix said. "He's carried the trauma forward, despite all I can do. Now he's here, away from his wife and child, and we're so alone."

Banner said nothing for a long moment. "Then ... he needs you to be brave for him. I think we must be the only two ghosts whose Guardians have families. And they mean the world to them, don't they?"

"Yes. I mean ... with no memories, it's all they have."

"Ask the Traveler for more Light," Banner said. "It understands. I've had to do it when I've been so afraid for Ferral. Like when his Taken clan shows up. Light, I'm scared of them."

"I don't blame you." Phoenix looked at Jayesh, sound asleep beside him on the pillow. "I'd better get some rest. We've got a lot to do tomorrow."

"You do that. And have courage. You and your Guardian have such powerful Light. I couldn't believe he's so young."

"It's because of who he is," Phoenix replied. He dove beneath the blanket and nestled into Jayesh's arms. "My lovely, caring Guardian."

* * *

The Dreaming City was a glorious place in the morning light, without any visible stain yet upon it. Jayesh and Madrid stalked Scorn as they traveled from point to point, looking for Taken.

Instead of riding their sparrows, they hiked up and down little rocky mountains and through tiny pockets where someone had built benches for rest and meditation. Jayesh was continually delighted - by the artistic, wind-twisted trees, by grottoes of glittering crystal, by clumps of flowers growing around springs of fresh water. Madrid caught some of his mood and lightened up a little for the first time in weeks.

"Did people live here?" Jayesh asked as they crossed a grassy hillside, butterflies whirling about them. "There's buildings, but I don't see any real residences."

"The Dreaming City is a holy place," Madrid replied. "Think of it as one giant church. The Awoken live and conduct business elsewhere, but they come here for worship. Some people did live here - caretakers and Techeuns, mostly."

"What do they worship?" Jayesh asked. "Not the Traveler, surely."

"I haven't figured that out," Madrid replied. "Their religion is more of the self-reflection kind. I don't think they have a deity."

"Huh," Jayesh said. "I hate to say it, but without a deity, what they had was a power vacuum. Now, here comes Riven and the Hive gods."

"You said it, not me," Madrid said with a wry smile. "Don't let any of the Awoken hear you say that. That's blasphemy."

"Against what?" Jayesh said. "They don't have a god to blaspheme."

"They worship their queen, really," Madrid said. "But we're not allowed to talk about it. You and I, being Guardians, are considered stupid children."

"Blasphemous children," Jayesh said, and laughed as a butterfly landed on his finger. It was bright yellow, and sat there a moment, flexing its wings, before fluttering away.

Madrid watched him, inscrutable.

They continued across the meadow and dropped into a dry gully on the other side. Here they found a small cave where three Corsairs had set up a monitoring point.

"Hello, Madrid!" said the one nearest the door. She was a tall, slim Awoken in dark-colored armor.

"Hello, Elledia," Madrid replied. "This is Jayesh."

"Pleased to meet you," Elledia said, holding one hand in front of her face and bowing, in the customary Reefborn fashion.

"Pleased to meet you," Jayesh echoed, not sure whether to bow, nod, or just stand there. He ended up making an awkward sort-of bow over his rifle.

Elledia laughed. "Oh, isn't this one cute. We don't get a lot of cute Guardians. You must be quite young."

Jayesh didn't want to answer that. "Is this a computer?" he asked, studying an object nearby. It looked like a slab of black stone the height of a man, yet holographic circles and lines moved across its surface.

"This is a type of Awoken computer, yes," Elledia replied, turning to it. A flick of her fingers sent the circles spinning into new configurations. "We're monitoring the curse's energy fluctuations, looking for any change."

"Has there been any?" Madrid asked.

Elledia's smile faded. "No."

There was a heavy pause that Jayesh didn't understand.

Elledia forced a smile. "Still, I'm glad to see a new face now and then. Make us part of your rounds, Jayesh."

"I will," he said uncertainly.

One of the other Corsairs spoke up. "Keep an eye out for Limerick. He was roaming Rheasilver this morning, bothering the Guardians there."

"I'd put a bullet in his head," Madrid muttered, "if I knew it wouldn't make him so happy."

"If he wants to be dead," Jayesh asked, "why doesn't he suicide?"

Elledia shook her head. "It's not that simple. He has to die while granting the wish of another. Essentially, he will feed on their desire to kill him. That feeding will propel him into immortality. Murder takes very strong desire, you see."

Jayesh's mouth formed an O.

Madrid walked out of the cave without a word. "Goodbye," Jayesh said, and hurried after him.

Madrid climbed out of the gully and set off along a winding path over a sea of mist. Jayesh trotted behind, thinking uncomfortably of the amount of desire Madrid must have had to kill both himself and Uldren.

"He didn't kill you, though," Phoenix pointed out in his head.

"Only because I fought," Jayesh thought. "Kari shot him and he still gave me to the chimera."

"He wouldn't do that now," Phoenix said.

"Would he?" Jayesh thought. "I don't know. But I don't trust him, anyway."

Suddenly Madrid halted and knelt, sighting through the scope of his scout rifle. "Scorn."

Jayesh knelt, too, following his gaze. About a hundred feet further on, the path wound to the top of the cliffs. A gang of undead Fallen were walking down it, swinging flaming censors on chains. Jayesh had seen them whirl those censors and smash them into opponents, soaking them in burning fuel. This was unpleasant even for Guardians.

Madrid shot the leader's censor. It exploded all over the aliens. They screeched and flailed. Madrid picked them off, one by one, in the confusion. Jayesh didn't have a clear shot, so he watched, keeping close to the cliff for cover. Madrid was a professional soldier, one shot, one kill, until all the aliens were dead.

Without a word, Madrid stood, climbed the path to where alien bodies blocked it, and shoved them off the cliff, one by one.

"How many times have you done this?" Jayesh asked.

Madrid shrugged. "Only twice. Usually the Corsairs get this bunch."

Jayesh helped kick the stinking bodies over the edge, where they fell into mist and vanished.

They continued up the path to the top of the cliffs, where clumps of little trees grew, their spiral branches casting a dappled shade. Madrid sat down. "Your next gang of Taken will show up soon," he said, pointing down the other side of the cliffs. There was the crevice they had visited the previous evening. Madrid went on, "You go check them out. If the girl's not there, you can handle them."

"Right." Jayesh slid down the hillside, his back prickling as he realized he'd given Madrid a clear shot at his head.

But Madrid made no move to attack. He laid his gun down and summoned his ghost, taking no notice of Jayesh.

Jayesh picked out a nice boulder for cover and waited for the Taken to show up. The minutes ticked by. The sun warmed his back. Jayesh let himself rest a little, basking in the warmth.

Footsteps approached. Jayesh looked up, expecting to see Madrid. Instead, Limerick walked up, clad in mismatched gear, his orange eyes fixed on him. "Hello, Jayesh," he said, sitting on the boulder. "Hunting Taken? Mind if I watch?"

"Sure," Jayesh said cautiously. "You're exposed up there, though. They'll shoot you."

Limerick laughed. "I'm not worried, Guardian. Nice day, isn't it? It'll rain tomorrow, though. It always does on day two."

"How weird," Jayesh said. "I'll bet you have this time loop memorized."

"Everybody does," Limerick said, grinning. "You will, too, if you stay long enough. I suppose that's why you're here? Altruistic motives? Save the Awoken from the big, bad dragon curse?"

"No, actually," Jayesh said. "I'm here to save one person."

Limerick raised an eyebrow. It made his pale face look more cunning than he probably intended.

"She's Taken," Jayesh explained. "The Traveler asked me to try to save her with Light. I just have to find her, first."

"Taken can't be saved," Limerick said, but his laugh sounded forced. "The Darkness has utterly filled them, inside and out."

"I have to try," Jayesh said.

Limerick snorted. "You'll probably die trying. The Taken can quench your Light. You actually trust the Traveler?"

Jayesh blinked at him. "Yes. But you're an Ahamkara. Why do you care?"

"I don't," Limerick replied. "I just happen to know a plot when I hear one. The Traveler loves war and death. Everywhere it goes, war follows. Just ask the Eliksni. Look at the way your own civilization has collapsed. Your planet would still be populated if not for the Traveler and its so-called Light."

"I've heard this logic before," Jayesh replied. "The followers of Osiris say that, too. And they're wrong. The Traveler blesses and enriches civilizations. But the Darkness hates it and tries to destroy anything good that the Traveler accomplishes."

"Your understanding is so simplistic," Limerick grinned. "The Traveler blesses with Light, but brings with it a blight. Its people grow smart, but quickly lose heart, when the sky is devoured by Night."

"How long do you spend thinking of those?" Jayesh asked.

Limerick shrugged. "It's easy. And true. It makes sense that you Guardians are devoted to the being that raised you and gave you power. That's all that matters, in the end. More power. Doesn't matter where the energy comes from. Void Light is part Darkness. The energy radiation pulls from both sources. Yet you Guardians use it. The Awoken use it. Taken are the same as Guardians, but the opposite end of the power spectrum."

"There's more to it than power," Jayesh replied. "The Light allows a Guardian their free will. Taken have no free will. They're enslaved. That's why they have that bright spot on their faces - it's where another being's will supersedes their own."

"Not all Taken," Limerick replied. "Some keep their will. Like Riven. When the Darkness Took her, she devoured it in return. Even the Darkness fears her, now."

"You know an awful lot about Darkness," Jayesh replied.

Limerick shrugged. "I'm hoping to become Taken, myself. So hard to find a good Maw these days. The blights at the end of the curse cycle are all occupied Taking the city. I can't get any of them to notice me."

Jayesh stared. "Why would you want to be Taken?"

"It's the ultimate feast," Limerick replied. "I'd ascend the way Riven has. Imagine! Two Taken Ahamkara? We would turn the universe on its ear."

"And eat all the Light in the Sky?" Jayesh said.

Limerick laughed. "Probably. We might spare your Traveler. Darkness is nothing without Light to define it. But devouring your Traveler would be satisfying, too."

Jayesh just stared at him in silence.

"Now I've offended you," Limerick said, sliding off the rock. "Simple little Lightbearer. Ask your Traveler about me, if you can get it to answer. It probably won't. You Guardians are a means to an end. It cares about you the way a warrior cares for his sword. He keeps it cleaned and sharpened, but no more than that."

He whirled and walked away. His cloak seemed to take the shape of bat wings for a split second as he went.

Jayesh gazed after him in troubled silence. In his head, he said, "Phoenix, that guy is dangerous."

"I noticed," his ghost replied. "He wants to eat the Darkness and the Light, too. Do me a favor and never let him see me."

"Done," Jayesh said. "I never let Spider see you, either."

Phoenix shuddered. "Spider likes ghosts for their outsides. I think Limerick would take their insides."


	5. Be careful

Reality warped as Taken crossed over from the Ascendant plane, filling the gully with their black, burning shapes. Jayesh ducked behind the rock again, fighting the mild nausea their appearance always gave him. "About time."

"Traffic was bad, obviously," Phoenix quipped.

Jayesh raised his rifle and studied each Taken through the scope. They milled about, unaware of his presence. He categorized their shapes in his head. Four Hive thralls and a Knight, three Vex goblins, five Cabal Psions -

And one human female.

Jayesh squinted, trying to see her details. Race was hard to tell with Taken, because all that was left was outlines. But her build matched the image the Traveler had showed him, and her hair was the same. She wobbled here and there with the others, jaw hanging open, gripping whatever weapon of Darkness they had manifested with this time. It looked like it had once been a pulse rifle. Who knew what it fired now.

"That's her," Jayesh thought.

"This will be tricky," Phoenix thought. "As soon as you start shooting, they'll rush you."

"I know." Jayesh hesitated, looking at his rifle. "Phoenix, send this back to the ship and transmat Sturm."

The rifle fizzed away in blue particles of energy. A moment later, a silver hand cannon appeared and dropped into his hands. Jayesh pulled out his sidearm, Drang, and held it alongside Sturm. The two weapons crackled with energy when brought together - they were relics of the Golden Age. Kari had gifted him Drang, but he'd had to do the Cryptarch a lot of favors to dig Sturm out of the vaults.

"Are you going to duel-wield?" Phoenix asked.

"I've wanted to try this forever," Jayesh thought, aiming with one, then the other. "If Sturm's kick breaks my wrist, heal it quick, please."

"My Guardian the gunslinger," Phoenix said jovially. "Fire when ready."

Jayesh rose from hiding and attacked the Taken with a handcannon and a sidearm, firing both at once. Lightning leaped from weapon to weapon, empowering each bullet with extra Light. The Taken screeched and died.

As Pheonix had feared, the mob leaped out of the crevice and ran at Jayesh's face. He spun, firing with one weapon, then the other. Claws scored his shoulder. A knife sank into his thigh. Energy bolts slashed his ribs. But worse was the sensation of their Darkness - thick, oily Darkness that tried to envelop him. It carried with it a frenzied rage, so he could almost taste the hatred the Taken felt for him. They had nothing left but rage and hate.

Madrid's scout rifle spoke, once, twice, three times. Jayesh's weapons clicked on empty magazines. The woman he was supposed to save took Madrid's bullet through the midsection. Her shape contorted, folding in on itself.

"Wait!" he called.

The woman's head jerked up with animal swiftness. Her dead, black eyes fixed on him.

"I can help you," Jayesh said.

She screamed - a metallic, inhuman sound. Then she folded and vanished, reality rippling behind her.

"I think she said no," Phoenix said, healing him from phase.

Jayesh stood there, gripping his empty weapons, panting. Frustration boiled through him. "She was right there, Phoenix! Right in front of me! And Madrid shot her!"

"He didn't know it was her," Phoenix replied. "He was saving you."

Jayesh couldn't argue with this, but it was no less maddening. "Does this mean I'll have to wait through all three weeks of the time loop to see her again?"

"She wasn't dead," Phoenix pointed out. "She's probably running around the Ascendant Realm somewhere."

Limping from his half-healed wounds, Jayesh climbed the hill toward Madrid. Madrid watched him, scout rifle under his arm.

"She was right there," Jayesh told him. "We killed her."

Madrid shut his eyes and inhaled. "Blast."

"Will she show up again?"

"Possibly." Madrid shook his head and grinned a little. "I keep shooting people you're trying to save."

Jayesh didn't know how to reply without saying something accusing. So he kept his mouth shut and watched Phoenix circling him, playing his healing beam up and down Jayesh's body.

"Limerick wanted to hang out, I see," Madrid said. "You didn't make any wishes, did you?"

"No," Jayesh said. "He tried to tell me that it's impossible to save a Taken. He also went on about being Taken so he can eat the Darkness and the Light."

Madrid made a face. "That'd be worse than someone wishing him dead."

Jayesh skipped over the questions about the Traveler. They lingered in his mind, itchy and irritating. He'd sort them out, himself, before spreading them around. He patted Phoenix as the ghost finished healing him.

"Duel-wielding, eh?" Madrid said.

Jayesh held up his weapons. "They synergize."

Madrid jerked his head. "Let's head to the next point. Tell me about them on the way."

They investigated the remaining crossover points for the Taken, talking weapons, fire rates, and modifications. Madrid examined the scope on Jayesh's graviton lance and promised him a better one.

The Taken woman didn't reappear for the rest of the day, no matter how many other Taken appeared. Jayesh feared that she wouldn't show up for another three weeks, and as the day wore on, this fear turned into a gloomy acceptance. He'd be stuck in the Dreaming City like Madrid, but his chain was one of duty, not punishment.

The misty atmosphere drew closer together as the day progressed. The sun set in a bank of fiery clouds, and night closed in beneath a thick cloud bank. The rain Limerick had forecast was on the way.

"Bring a rain poncho, if you have one," Madrid said. "Day two gets pretty miserable."

"Right," Jayesh said, and they parted ways for the night.

Jayesh returned to the Dasa compound and took the same room he'd had the night before. He checked his messages and was quietly delighted to see a nice long one from Kari.

She expressed how much she missed him and begged him to take care of himself, especially around Madrid. "I know he's probably all right, now. But Jay, I just can't forget the look on his face as he stabbed you and hauled you to the meatball. Watch your back."

Then she detailed her own activities.

"There's another new mother in the Tower, believe it or not. Her name is Naomi. She and her husband are refugees, just arrived in the City last week. She has a baby, only a few months old, born before her husband became a Guardian. She's not one, and is a little afraid of this society of immortals she's joined.

"I invited her over today, and we had a pleasant visit. I may be a Guardian, but I'm also a new mother, and we bonded over that. I think you'd get along with her husband, Charles. He's a hunter, but he's asking to stay in the Tower so as not to leave his family. I think they'll let him."

Jayesh smiled as he read, hearing her voice in his mind. Another Guardian family! It would be so nice to have someone who could relate to the peculiar struggles of raising a family amidst military life.

He wrote her a long letter chronicling his adventures of the day. But he left out Limerick. How to explain the existence of an Ahamkara that nobody had tried to kill? The Dreaming City seemed to have a layer of secrets that everyone kept without question.

He sent his letter, then flopped on his bed. "Phoenix, should I ask the Traveler about what Limerick said? About ... only being a sword?"

"What can it hurt?" Phoenix replied, already snuggled into Jayesh's pillow. "You know how it likes arguing with you."

Jayesh grinned a little. Then he lay back and closed his eyes, focusing on the Light inside him - warm, fiery Light. He followed it back to its source. "Hello, Traveler."

His Light brightened as it acknowledged him.

"I'm here, in the Reef," he told it. "The Dreaming City is beautiful, but the curse is so awful. There's an Ahamkara here named Limerick. He was spouting the same rhetoric that the followers of Osiris do - that you're evil and love war and all that. He seems to think he'd be justified in consuming both the Light and Darkness."

The Traveler's thought touched his mind, showing him two images. One was a great, coiled Worm - a Worm God of the Hive. The other was an Ahamkara - a great scaly dragon with four eyes and huge tusks. Despite being different creatures, there was something akin about both creatures - something in the shape of their heads, and in the long, powerful bodies.

Jayesh tried to grasp the meaning of this image. "Are you saying ... they're both evil monsters?"

"They each arose from the same source," the Traveler replied. "So long ago that you cannot imagine it, their first ancestor brought the Darkness upon this universe. The Worms serve it wholeheartedly. The Ahamkara serve only their own appetites. They embrace both Light and Darkness. While some of their race have sought the Light, many others pursued Darkness, as it offered them fulfillment for their relentless hunger."

Jayesh thought about this for a while. He'd read conjecture about this very thing in the Tower Archives, and it lined up with this story. "So, what you're saying is, don't trust Limerick?"

"He comes of a race of tricksters," the Traveler replied. "Master manipulators and liars. Sift his words."

"He said ..." Jayesh faltered, hesitant to repeat such things after being told about the nature of the source. "Well ... he said that you don't care about Guardians. We're only your weapons."

He sensed a faint pulse from the Traveler, almost like a long sigh. Then it said, "Look at your ghost, Guardian Jayesh."

He turned his head and looked at Phoenix. The ghost blinked at him, nestled cozily beside his head. He emoted a smile, his eye turning into an upward V. Jayesh smiled back.

"Does your ghost love you?" the Traveler asked.

"Yes, very much," Jayesh said.

"Has he sacrificed for you?"

"Yes."

"Attempted to protect you?"

"Yes." Jayesh sensed where this was going and shrank into himself in shame.

"Your ghost was created from myself," the Traveler replied. "He was designed to be your special friend and carries my own nature. A being without the ability to care cannot create a caring being."

Jayesh couldn't answer. He only gazed at Phoenix and felt like a crumb for not thinking of this and believing the dragon, even if only a little.

"Guardian Jayesh," the Traveler whispered, "my Guardians fought when I could not. But now, I fight beside you in ways you can't understand. You are a human - your mind cannot grasp it. You are far more than a weapon to be used and discarded. You are mine. I rejoice and grieve with you - and all my Guardians. When one of you dies, I lament your passing. But because I am not human, humans misunderstand my actions - or perceived lack of action. Whenever you have cause to doubt, look at your ghost. Remember his love for you. And know that that love is mine."

"Thank you, Traveler." Jayesh was so ashamed, he could hardly form the words. He stroked Phoenix and said nothing else.

"What's wrong?" Phoenix asked.

"Oh ..." Jayesh forced a smile. "The Traveler gave me a talking to."

"Are you in trouble?"

"No. I just wish I hadn't doubted. It pointed to you."

"Me?" Phoenix blinked nervously. "Am I in trouble?"

"No, no. But it said ... but you ..." Jayesh trailed off.

Phoenix waited. When Jayesh said nothing else, the ghost prompted, "You can tell me, Jay."

"It said that it loves us the way ghosts love their Guardians," Jayesh whispered.

"Oh." Phoenix thought about this a moment. "Ohh." He touched Jayesh's face with his shell. "So ... you're not just a sword."

Jayesh stroked the ghost with one finger. "More like ... family."

"I'd like to be considered family," Phoenix said brightly. "I can be your brother! Your longsuffering big brother who gets you out of trouble."

"Big?" Jayesh said, tapping the little robot.

"Older," Phoenix amended. "Definitely cooler. Smarter. I'd drive a racing sparrow and all the girls would love me."

"Hey, leave some room for me in this fantasy," Jayesh laughed.

"I'd give you rides on my sparrow," Phoenix said. "I'd give you life advice and lecture you about your education."

Jayesh lay back and laughed for a moment. "Aside from the sparrow, you already do all those things. And you're cooler and smarter than me."

"Hey," Phoenix said warningly, "don't start the unworthy worm thing again."

"I'm not, I'm not." Jayesh patted him. "I fell for the Ahamkara's lies about the Traveler. I _knew_ they were lies and I _still_ believed them. The Traveler did this sigh thing when I asked. I feel like such a moron."

"Well, now you won't fall for it," Phoenix replied. "Forewarned is forearmed and such. Now, listen to your big brother and go to sleep."

Jayesh turned out the light. "You're not really my big brother," he murmured.

"I'm about seven hundred years older than you, Jay."

Jayesh sighed. "Don't rub it in. I was going to say, you're my ghost. That's better than a brother."

"Aww." Phoenix's eye blushed pink. "Thanks."

Jayesh dozed off with his ghost's contentment warming him through their bond.

* * *

It was pouring rain in the Dreaming City when Jayesh stepped out of his ship the next day. He wore a waterproof poncho and hood, which immediately began to run with tiny rivers. The lake of mist now resembled an actual lake, water standing an inch above the rocks.

Madrid was waiting for him, standing under his cruiser's wing to keep the rain off. He wore a Hunter's waterproof, which was a trench coat of water-repelling material. He nodded to Jayesh in greeting, then summoned his sparrow. "Follow me. I'll explain day two when we're out of the rain."

Jayesh summoned his own sparrow and set out into the falling rain. Visibility was only about a hundred yards, the mountains and tower completely hidden. The gray clouds hung low, their bellies almost near enough to touch. It was cold. At first Jayesh noticed the wet more than the cold. Then he realized his hands were slowly going numb on his handlebars. The cold crept through the rest of his body. Not a deadly cold, just an unpleasant wet chill that made him think of fires and warm drinks.

Madrid led him through a tunnel and out into a narrow, rocky valley. Up in the valley wall was a cave with a Corsair camp in it. The Guardians parked outside and went in. It seemed that the rain drove a lot of other Guardians to shelter, too, because there was quite a crowd inside. The Corsairs had set up several space heaters, and the Guardians clustered around them, checking ghosts, reading maps, or in the case of one group, playing cards in focused silence.

Madrid pushed through the crowd to speak to a Corsair. Jayesh sat on a rock and studied the crowd. He recognized most of the Guardians by sight, having seen them in the Tower. He knew all the warlocks by name, though, having spent much time on mercy teams with them in the plague following the Red War.

"Hey, it's Jayesh!" exclaimed one warlock. Several warlocks emerged frown the crowd and joined him in the corner. They began exchanging their experiences in the Dreaming City, updating Jayesh on what to expect in the coming days and weeks. He asked questions and listened carefully.

After a while, the warlocks returned to their other activities. Madrid had watched this from a distance. Now he walked up and sat another rock nearby. "Popular, are you?"

"Not really," Jayesh said. "I just know most of the warlocks in the Vanguard from the plague year."

Madrid nodded. His blue face looked a little leaner today, a little more shadowed. His yellow eyes were a dull amber. He sat hunched over, elbows on his knees. "I've got to ask. How did you kill the chimera?"

This was the last thing Jayesh thought Madrid would ever want to know. For a moment, he simply stared at the hunter, wondering if this was some kind of joke.

"Just tell me," Madrid said wearily. "I was dead at the time and missed it."

"Healing rift," Jayesh said.

Madrid waited for more. When Jayesh offered nothing else, Madrid arched an eyebrow. "You healed the thing to death?"

"Well of Radiance goes off like a bomb," Jayesh explained. "I stuck the sword all the way through the bottom jaw."

Madrid nodded. "Right. The sword. So the thing hadn't swallowed you."

Jayesh curled his fingers together like interlocking teeth. "It was chewing on me. Taking my Light. Nom nom."

Only the major details mattered. It made it easier to forget the horror, the stench, the pain and Darkness.

"So you popped your Well and that killed it?" Madrid asked.

"More or less," Jayesh said, unwilling to think of those last, desperate seconds. "Funny thing was, I healed Uldren."

Madrid's face went blank. He gazed at Jayesh through a cold, hard mask.

"The chimera's insides weren't like ours," Jayesh said. "Uldren was pretty close by, inside the thing, when my Well went off. It healed him. I think that's why he was still alive. Afterwards." He looked away, unable to meet those frigid yellow eyes.

"I didn't ask about _Uldren_ ," Madrid said, his voice soft and deadly.

Jayesh sat very still, expecting a knife in the neck at any second. Why had he brought that up to Uldren's killer?

"A Corsair gets injured today," Madrid went on, still in that dangerous tone. "Tomorrow, she dies. I need to know if your healing power can save her."

"I suppose so." Jayesh hesitated. "But ... her death is part of the time loop?"

Madrid nodded.

"I don't know how much good I can do, then." Jayesh glanced out the cave mouth at the falling rain. "What kind of injury?"

"Gut shot."

Jayesh winced. "My rift works on Guardians just fine. And it worked all right on sick people. But a wound like that? On a non-Guardian?"

"I need you to try," Madrid said.

Jayesh studied him. The Hunter's tone, the despair in his voice, hinted at something deeper. "Does this Corsair ... know what will happen?"

"Yes. She's been trying to escape it. But she's forced to repeat the same actions. Stand in the same place. She always dies."

She. That explained it. Madrid had let his emotions get involved. Jayesh suddenly felt sorry for him for the first time.

"Show me where she is," Jayesh said. "I'll do what I can."


	6. Weird Awoken Kitty

The Corsair in question was stationed near a lot of interconnected asteroids called the Spine of Keres. The mist between each asteroid made them seem like islands in an ocean, rather than rocks teetering on the edge of outer space. Bridges of white and blue stone connected each island, and trees grew in every crevice.

It was a beautiful place, even in the rain. It poured down in sheets, soaking their boots, wetting every centimeter of exposed skin. It threatened to flood their sparrows, so they had to proceed on foot.

"How could anybody see well enough through this to shoot anyone else?" Jayesh said, wiping his eyes.

"The Scorn ignore weather," Madrid replied grimly. "They use the rain to hide their movements. They're down there right now." He pointed into the mist. It was a solid white blanket, hiding whatever lay beneath it.

Jayesh followed him over a bridge and around the side of an island, where a small waterfall poured down in a curtain of droplets. They ducked through it and entered a small cave on the other side.

A single Corsair worked at one of the Awoken holographic computers inside. She looked up as they entered. "Hello, Madrid," she said evenly. "Who's this?"

"Guardian Jayesh," Madrid replied. "He's the best healer I've ever met."

"It's worth a try," said the Corsair. She bowed to Jayesh, one hand before her face. "I am Wren. Today is the day I sustain a mortal wound. I suffer for twenty-one hours, then die. When the time loops restarts, I am alive again. I spend one day alive and unhurt. If you can alter these events, I would be grateful."

Jayesh stood there, nonplussed at being called the best healer Madrid knew. High praise, coming from the taciturn Hunter. He processed what Wren had said and was even more baffled. "So ... you remember dying in the time loop? How is that possible?"

"It shouldn't be," she replied with a shrug. "I should have no memory of prior loops. Yet I awaken every three weeks at the hour of reset, fully aware of my death."

She was too controlled of a person to complain about this. Yet she and Madrid looked at Jayesh with hope and sadness. He wanted to promise Wren that this time, it would be different, that she wouldn't die. But he knew the limitations of his powers, and all reassurances stuck in his throat.

"I'll try to help," he said lamely.

Madrid followed Wren a few steps to her computer, and they spoke softly together. Madrid's posture was gentle, protective. He even put a hand on her shoulder, and Madrid seldom touched anyone.

"Smitten," Jayesh thought to Phoenix. "Why did he have to fall for the girl who dies?"

"He probably felt sorry for her, at first," Phoenix replied. "If he's been trying to save her, then she's been on his mind a lot. It happens."

"Can I heal a fatal wound on a non-Guardian?"

"We can try." Phoenix sounded fierce. "Your Well of Radiance is powerful enough to destroy a chimera. Surely it can mend a single wound."

The minutes ticked by and the rain poured down. Jayesh sat there, holding the Light in his mind, pondering his healing power, trying to hone it and make it stronger. Wren began to cast anxious glances at the door.

The hologram computer lit with approaching hostiles. It made a soft chiming noise.

"I have to go," Wren said in despair. She pulled on a helmet and picked up a rifle, moving mechanically, like a bad actor in a play.

"I'll go first," Madrid said, and darted out of the cave. His scout rifle barked.

Jayesh followed him out. In the rain and mist, the silhouettes of a gang of Scorn came leaping up the island's foot. They carried shields that deflected bullets. Madrid's shots pinged off them. He cursed under his breath and aimed for their legs.

Jayesh fired, too, picking off one, then another. Too slow - they needed to kill them faster. The aliens drew nearer, growling and hissing in their own language.

Wren pushed her way between them, adding her own shots. The Scorn fired back, bullets flying around the Guardians and Corsair. One caught Jayesh in the shoulder, and he almost dropped his rifle. As he fumbled with it, hurting and feeling Phoenix heal him, Wren gasped and doubled up.

Madrid cursed and lobbed a grenade at the aliens. One of them bounced it off his shield and sent it flying out into the mist, where it detonated harmlessly. Jayesh and Madrid had to fight the gang hand to hand, taking several more injuries before the last alien fell.

Then Madrid helped Wren stumble back into the cave. "Heal her!" he snapped.

"I'll try," Jayesh said. He summoned his fiery sword, Light blazing into being around him, briefly touching his shoulders with a hint of wings. He stabbed the sword into the floor, sending its energy flowing outward in a ring of healing.

Madrid helped Wren lie down in it. The golden Light lapped her, flowing into her. Jayesh held the sword's hilt, trying to boost the power, and focused on the bloody wound in Wren's stomach.

Phoenix appeared and flew over her, scanning. "Severe damage to the intestines," he reported. "Looks like bleeding and ruptured intestinal contents."

"Can you heal it?" she gasped, tears running down her face.

Phoenix looked at Jayesh. "We can try."

Jayesh focused on Wren, trying to direct all his healing into her. But she wasn't a Guardian, and her body wasn't as receptive to his Light. He sensed things mending, ever so slowly. Even if he closed the wound and healed her insides, the resulting septic shock and bleeding would still kill her. But there was no use saying it aloud. Madrid and Wren were watching him with such hope.

Jayesh kept the Well going for as long as he could, which was about twenty minutes. Then he had to rest, sitting on the floor, panting. Once he was able, he summoned another sword and did it over again.

"If she was a Guardian," he thought to his ghost, "I'd use my sword on her. It would heal her instantly. But I'm afraid to try it on a regular person."

"Let's see if we can make this work," Phoenix replied.

Jayesh healed and healed for hours. By noon, the bleeding had stopped and the wound had shrank. "It doesn't hurt as much," Wren reported. Her eyes glowed with hope. Madrid sat beside her, holding her hand, watching with a desperate expression.

Jayesh was beginning to tire, but he kept it to himself. If he could snatch this one life from Riven's jaws, then it would be a success as great as restoring a Taken. And he wanted to save her for Madrid's sake. Light, Madrid needed someone to care about. If he could just heal her a little faster - if his Light was a little stronger-

The day wore into afternoon. Jayesh had to stop and eat a ration pack for lunch, but Madrid touched nothing. Jayesh cast Well after Well after Well, pouring enough Light into Wren to heal a hundred Guardians.

By the time the daylight began to fade, Jayesh was spent. Wren's wound had entirely closed, but she burned with fever. Madrid stroked her forehead, wordlessly expressing his affection. She held his hand and suffered, breathing through her teeth. Jayesh curled up on the floor and went to sleep.

He awoke a few hours later, feeling as if he'd been run over by a tank. But he had enough energy left to continue healing, so he did.

Wren survived for twenty-eight hours. The night passed, then a day, then another night. She died in the middle of a healing rift, her body too weak to take in the Light any longer.

Madrid crumpled over her body, clasping her hand and crying softly - a terrible, anguished sound that pained the ear. Jayesh leaned against the wall, too tired to move. It had been such a marathon, and he had still failed. The curse had triumphed.

Madrid took Wren's body to his sparrow and carried her off to a cave where dead Corsairs were laid for the duration of the time loop. Jayesh returned to his ship, so tired, he could barely steer his sparrow. He fell asleep on the short flight back to the Dasa compound. There he crawled into bed and slept for twelve hours.

He awoke on the evening of the curse's third day, ravenous and glum. He hunted through the compound and found the mess hall, where Guardians could pick up a meal for a small fee. Jayesh bought everything that looked good, took it to a corner table, and ate steadily for nearly an hour. Phoenix floated beside him for company. Jayesh had another letter from Kari, which he read several times as he ate. It brimmed with love and encouragement. He half-heartedly began a response, but couldn't bring himself to tell her about his failure. Not yet.

"What did we learn?" Jayesh asked his ghost after a while.

"That secondary infections are deadly?" Phoenix offered.

Jayesh nodded and took several bites before speaking. "I think I should have been healing Wren differently. She was Awoken. They have Light and Darkness. I felt like I did it the hard way, somehow."

"I know what you mean," Phoenix replied. "You cast thirty-three healing rifts back to back. Back in the City, that would have healed crowds of people. Maybe it's because we're so far from the Traveler?"

"Maybe. I don't think that's it." Jayesh ate some more, his various dishes beginning to look empty. "Ping Ferral, would you? I need advice."

Phoenix did, and chatted to his ghost a moment. "He's sending his wife down. Her name is Lethia, and she's a healer, too."

"Oh good," Jayesh said in surprise. He hastily tidied his table.

Lethia Dasa arrived a few minutes later. She was a pretty Awoken with blue hair arranged in the latest Reef fashion. She wore a simple Warlock robe and leggings - a Guardian, yet not out for combat.

She bowed to Jayesh before pulling out a chair. "Hello, Guardian. Having trouble healing?"

Jayesh told her what he'd tried to do. Lethia leaned her elbows on the table and listened. Her eyes were an odd blue-green color, bright in her blue-skinned face.

"You worked for twenty-eight hours?" she said in disbelief. "And she still died? Guardian, that's not right. I think the curse was working against you directly."

Jayesh spread his hands. "That's what I kept thinking. It didn't work. What could I have done differently?"

Lethia summoned her ghost, who wore a cheerful yellow shell. "Any advice, Niki?"

The ghost looked at Jayesh and Phoenix for a moment. "You have lots of Light, so that's not the problem," he observed. "Thirty-three healing rifts should have been overkill. It does sound like the curse. Riven wished that woman to die."

Jayesh pinched the bridge of his nose. "Wishes. Right. So, what if I found another Ahamkara and wished for her to live?"

"Like Limerick?" Lethia said sharply. "Oh yes, we know about him. Don't even think about feeding him. He'd twist the wish. She'd live, but be crippled, or brain damaged, or some other awful thing. If he would even work against his beloved Riven."

"So ..." Jayesh said, stretching out the word. "... there's no way to save Wren?"

"If you could remove her from the time loop," Lethia said, "that would do it. But non-Guardians can't escape the temporal flux. Everyone in the Dreaming City will stay there until the curse is broken."

Jayesh rubbed his temples. "There's got to be a way. What if we ... I don't know ... sneaked her out through the Ascendant Realm?"

Lethia stared at him, wide-eyed. "You think you can navigate the Sea of Screams?"

"I just want to know if it's possible," Jayesh said.

Lethia shrugged. "Anything's possible. So is getting lost out there and never finding your way back. You'd have better odds waiting for her to resurrect as a Guardian."

"Those are long odds." Jayesh looked at Phoenix. "I just can't believe I couldn't save her. There has to be a way."

Lethia shook her head and traced the wood grain in the tabletop. "We've been fighting this curse for months, now. It's a terrible thing. If you could find a way to break it, then yes, you could save the Dreaming City. But there are other forces at work, stronger than you and I. Intelligence points to a Taken Vex maintaining the time loop. Yet where is this Vex? We've killed the one we thought was in charge, but the loop continues, unchanged. It may take several fire teams invading the Ascendant Realm and challenging Savathun, herself, to break the curse."

Jayesh shook his head. "That's beyond me."

Lethia nodded. "Me, too. I just don't know, at this point. You might have to simply let the Corsair die. Ease her passing every cycle, maybe. My healing uses Void Light, and it makes little headway against the curse, either."

Jayesh blinked. "You heal with Void Light?"

Lethia nodded. "It takes some doing, but it's extremely useful. But your Solar Light suits you." Her gaze flicked over him, lingering on the flicker of Light in his eyes. "Righteous fire, is that it?"

"Yes," Jayesh said, startled. "How'd you know?"

"I look at the Light of Guardians all the time," Lethia replied. "Different disciplines, different motivations. Yours are aligned exactly, which boosts your power. And also ..." She squinted. "Arc Light is mixed in there, too. Do you alternate disciplines?"

"No, I ..." Jayesh rubbed the back of his neck. "That's my wife's."

"Oh." Lethia grinned. "That explains it. Not a lot of married Guardians around here, so I don't see the combined Light much." She stood up, smoothing her robe. "Hang in there, Guardian. Don't blame yourself for not saving a life. People die in this war of ours."

"Yes," Jayesh said, "but letting them suffer the same death over and over is cruel."

"Dragons and Hive gods feast on cruelty," Lethia said.

* * *

Jayesh went back to his room and surprised himself by sleeping the rest of the night. The next morning, when his time loop app told him it was day five, he couldn't believe it.

"It was day two, Phoenix! How did I lose three days?"

"A day and a quarter healing Wren," Phoenix said. "You slept another day, then slept through the following night. Here we are, day five."

"Calendar math makes no sense," Jayesh muttered, buckling on his combat robe.

Madrid's ship was parked on the misty shore, as usual, but the Hunter was nowhere in sight. Jayesh set out to patrol the Taken crossover points alone.

That was how he found the cat.

He got lost trying to find the white bridge. It was a foggy morning, and he took a wrong turn, mistaking a building's arched roof for the bridge in the distance. Phoenix corrected his course, so Jayesh tried to take a shortcut across the top of a crag. He missed his footing and slid down the side of the crag into a tiny alcove in the rock.

Inside this alcove, sitting on a bench and peering out at the world, was a cat.

Jayesh slowly climbed to his feet, watching the little animal, expecting it to move. It sat still as stone, its tail curled around its forepaws, watching the outside world intently.

Then the light caught it just right, and he realized it was a statue.

Or was it?

"Phoenix, what is this?" he said, summoning his ghost.

Phoenix flew around the cat, scanning it. If it was a statue, it was carved from some substance that had colored stripes running through it, all the colors of cats: black, gray, orange, and white.

"Well," Phoenix said, floating in front of its petite face, "it's both a cat and not a cat."

"What's that mean?"

"This is some kind of construct. It only partially exists in our dimension. But I want to say that it's the distilled essence of nine cats, strange as that sounds. We see one, but this is nine. And I think it's aware of us."

"Can I touch it?"

"Carefully."

Jayesh pulled off his glove and touched the cat's head, between the pointed ears. "It's warm," he said. "It feels like it's made of glass, but it feels alive, too." He stroked it gently. "Hi, weird Awoken kitty. I'll bet you get lonely way up here."

"It's nine cats," Phoenix said. "Lonely is the last thing it is."

Jayesh sat beside it on its bench and gazed out the narrow opening of the alcove. The fog below was clearing, revealing roofs and treetops. The bridge he had been trying to find lay below, gleaming white in the early sun.

"I'll come visit you again," he told the statue. "Poor kitties. They'd be happier if they were running around like cats do."

"Ascendant cats?" Phoenix said. "They're probably hunting Ascendant mice and Ascendant birds right now."

"I don't think there's animals in the Ascendant Realm, Phoenix."

"You've visited one throne world and a couple of ruined spots, Jay. You hardly have comprehensive knowledge of what lives in there."

"Point."

Jayesh left the alcove and climbed down to the bridge to watch for Taken. They didn't show up for a while, so Jayesh sat and carved designs in a stick with his combat knife. When a gang of Scorn showed up, he killed them and returned to carving.

"Just think," he said to his ghost. "I can whittle this same stick every day for three weeks, then start over with the time loop reset. I'll go home a woodcarving expert."

"How many loops do you think we'll ride?" Phoenix asked.

Jayesh shook his head. "I don't know. The Taken woman hasn't showed up again. And I kind of want to try to save Wren again. Take her through one of these thin spots into the Ascendant Realm and keep her there until the time loop expires."

"Mortals can't stay in the Ascendant Realm for long," Phoenix said. "Not without a throne world or something else to orient to. They lose their minds."

Jayesh groaned. "Of course they do."

He would have said more, but the Taken finally arrived. And one of them was the Taken woman.

"This will be tricky," Jayesh muttered, studying her through his scope. "Fifteen Taken, all Hive, except her. And I have no backup."

"Work inside a healing rift," Phoenix suggested. "Is your benediction ready?"

Jayesh rehearsed the words in his mind. "Yes, I've got it. You're my backup for now, Phoenix. Don't let her quench my Light."

His ghost gave him an anxious look and phased. "I won't."

Jayesh secured his helmet and began picking off the Taken. As usual, they rushed him as soon as he revealed his position. He dropped a healing rift-a lesser one, not a Well of Radiance-and fought them from inside, firing at point-blank range with his graviton lance. The violet projectile punched through each demon's form, shredding them into nothing. But the Taken were fast, and even as their numbers dwindled, Jayesh was forced to fight them hand to hand. Their claws slashed into his arms and sides, searing through his armored robe and the bodysuit beneath.

But eventually, the only Taken left was the woman. She hurled herself at Jayesh, carrying a rifle, but using it as a club. He fended her off with his own. "I'm trying to help you!" he exclaimed.

"Don't want you!" she shrieked, her voice distorted, as if speaking through a pipe. "Don't need help! You die die die!"

Jayesh caught her arms and held her still. They burned straight through his gloves. She struggled with insane strength, trying to break his grip.

"May the Light shine upon you," Jayesh began, calling up that blessing of Light the Traveler had given him.

The words seemed to hurt the woman. She screamed and struggled harder, wrenching one hand out of his grip. Then she grabbed Jayesh's helmet and wrenched it off. Her burning fingernails caught his eyes.

Jayesh shrieked and let her go, spinning away with his hands over his face. The woman darted away and vanished from reality.

Jayesh tried to check his hands for blood, but saw only a bright blur. "Phoenix, she blinded me!"

Phoenix made a snarling noise. He emerged from phase and played his healing beam over his Guardian's face. "Why do they always go for the eyes? My poor Guardian. Hold on."

The healing rift was slowly mending the other wounds, but Jayesh's eyes and face were a bloody mess. Phoenix opened his shell and poured concentrated Light into his friend, rebuilding him as if performing a resurrection.

The wounds vanished, and Jayesh's eyes cleared. He blinked at Phoenix and wiped blood off his face, which only smeared it. "Thanks, little light. Ow, that was awful." He sat down in the healing rift and rested as it continued to lap him. Phoenix flew around him, shell still open, healing and healing.

"She's so strong," Jayesh muttered. "I don't know how I'm supposed to do this. I can't hold her and do the blessing at the same time." He looked at his gloves, which had been burned brown just from a few seconds of contact. "These are shot. She's like touching red-hot metal."

Phoenix flew in front of him and traced him with another healing beam, this one like an anxious caress. "Do you feel better? No more pain?"

"I'm all right, now," Jayesh said, stroking his shell. "You're a good partner."

"She shredded you," Phoenix said softly. "Catching is way harder than killing. I wish we could use a net or a trap or something."

"She'd burn through a net," Jayesh pointed out. "And she can walk through the walls of a trap. No, I'll just have to work faster. And make sure my helmet is latched to my suit."

The healing rift flickered out. Jayesh summoned his sparrow and set out for the gardens. Phoenix's presence was a ball of anxiety nearby.

"It's all right," Jayesh reassured him in his head.

"The light of the body is the eye," Phoenix said. "When the eye is good, the body is full of light. But when the eye is bad, the body is full of Darkness, and how great is that Darkness. She was after your Light, Jay. First your eyes. Then your heart."

Jayesh didn't reply, but a cold thread of fear shivered through him. He was fine as long as he was focused on the logistics of catching a Taken. But if he thought about what he had just done - grappled with a Taken, having it try to tear out his eyes - that sick fear threatened to take over. The kind of fear that made him want to crawl into a hole to hide and cry.

_You're a Guardian_ , he told himself fiercely. _Blessed of the Light, chosen by the Traveler. The minions of Darkness have no power over you._

He was a little steadier when he entered the gardens.


	7. Accidental Wish

Without the tiny blights darkening the air, the flowers and foliage were even brighter colors. A frog plopped into the pond as Jayesh crossed the lawn to its edge. He stood there, gazing across the rippling water with its lily pads to the little waterfall that cascaded down a cliff wall. The peace and stillness of this place soothed his taut nerves. He breathed the aromas of damp earth and flower perfume. If only Kari were here to share this with him. They could sit on one of those benches in the shade and enjoy the quiet. Maybe once the curse was broken ...

"I wish Kari could see this," he murmured to Phoenix.

Somewhere, a pair of jaws snapped shut. The universe rippled with power that seemed to grip Jayesh and wrench energy from him. He gasped and staggered.

Nearby, Limerick rose from where he had been sitting, unseen, behind a raised flower bed. Two spots of color stood in his pale cheeks, and his orange eyes burned with triumph. "Ah, such a small wish, yet such desire behind it."

Too late, Jayesh realized what he had said. "That didn't count! I wasn't really wishing it!"

"Yes, you were," Limerick replied. "I've granted your wish. Be careful what you say aloud, even when you believe yourself alone."

Jayesh stood still, horror hitting him like throwing knives. "Kari. What did you do to Kari?"

"You wished she could see this," Limerick said with a smug smile. "Now she can."

There were so many ways that could go badly. "Take it back!" Jayesh bellowed, summoning his fiery sword.

Limerick's smile widened. "Ooo, I've upset the Guardian. Please kill me, do." He pulled open his shirt to expose his bare chest. "Right in the heart, please."

Jayesh stood there, fire licking over his body, the Dawnblade sword blazing in his hand. And he couldn't do it. The blasted Ahamkara would win again. Slowly he let the sword fade and the fire go out.

"Aw." Limerick closed his shirt. "So disappointing. Maybe your next wish will be something much more dire. Perhaps for your family to join you? I could drag them straight through the Ascendant Realm and deliver them to you dead. Or insane. Either one would be amusing."

Jayesh snarled wordlessly, biting back words that could be twisted into another wish. He thought to Phoenix, "Send a message to Kari. Explain what happened. Find out if she's all right."

Phoenix obeyed, as furious and upset as his Guardian.

Jayesh whirled and stalked to the other end of the gardens, where a stone circle with a crystal floor took up the entire south end. He flung himself on a bench in the shade of the cliff and sat there, his heart racing. "Kari," he whispered. "Oh, Kari, what's he done to you?"

"Message sent," Phoenix said in his head. "But it'll be four hours before it reaches her."

Jayesh put his head in his hands, imagining all the ways Limerick might have twisted the wish. Hallucinations - overlaying the sight of the gardens onto everything she saw - making her a ghostly observer, forever stuck in one spot - and what would happen to Connor, if his mother couldn't see to take care of him?

Phoenix started to speak a couple of times, but stopped. The horror was simply too great for words.

When a gang of Taken showed up and milled around the stone circle, Jayesh barely paid attention to them. It wasn't until they noticed him and began shooting at him that he fired back and exterminated them. The woman wasn't among them. Maybe she only appeared once a day.

Jayesh cried out to the Traveler, inside his head. He poured out what he'd done and begged for help. The Traveler didn't reply, but it touched his Light, comforting and reassuring. Jayesh clung to that touch, terrified, helpless to do anything to save Kari.

He was still sitting there, hours later, when Madrid found him.

Limerick had left by then, and the gardens were empty. The sun had swung to the other end of the sky, and the shadows lay long and blue across the grass. Jayesh huddled on the bench, forehead against his knees, his ghost floating beside him. He alerted Jayesh to Madrid's presence, but Jayesh didn't stir.

Madrid reached them and stood looking at the crumpled warlock. "Something wrong?"

Jayesh didn't answer.

Phoenix flew forward. "We thought we were alone. He wished Kari could see the gardens. And Limerick was hiding nearby."

Madrid's eyes widened. He gripped his rifle and turned, surveying the pond and flowerbeds. "He granted the wish, the bastard. Of course he did."

"I can't fix it," Jayesh said, lifting his head. "I can't fix it, Madrid. I harmed Kari and it takes four hours to get a message out." He pressed his fists to his forehead and crumpled up again. "I don't even know what it's done to her."

Madrid stood there a long moment, cradling his scout rifle. "Well. Now we're in the same boat."

"What?" Jayesh looked up.

Madrid's hair hung in his eyes, and his face was creased with weariness. "Regrets for thoughtless action. Unforeseen consequences." He dropped onto the bench beside Jayesh. "Light, Jayesh. Sometimes you come off as the most self-righteous little asshole. Then you do something phenomenally stupid, like making a wish. Maybe you're not so bad, after all."

Jayesh grimaced. "This isn't very comforting."

Madrid grinned a little. "You know what? It is for me. We've both made giant, life-altering mistakes, now. Mistakes we can't fix. We'll be dealing with the consequences for the rest of our lives."

"Don't say that," Jayesh whispered. "Light, don't say Kari will be afflicted with - with my bad wish - forever. I can't stand it -" He wrapped his arms around his knees and hid his face. His shoulders shook.

Madrid sat there, watching the afternoon light play across the clouds. A certain lightness had entered his face, as if Jayesh's failure had encouraged him.

"The next Corsair to die will be Elledia," he told Jayesh.

Jayesh raised his head, his face contorted with tears. "I can't save her, Madrid. I couldn't save Wren."

"But you can try," Madrid said fiercely. "Light, you can't just mope like this. We have to fight every second of this time loop. What's happened to Kari can't be changed. But she's strong and resourceful. She'll figure it out. She's _not_ dead. You hear me, Jayesh? She's _alive_. You're not stuck watching her die over and over."

Jayesh sat with his head bowed.

"Elledia dies on day seven," Madrid said. "Tomorrow is day six. Maybe we can change events enough to save her. I almost did, last time."

Jayesh slowly straightened, drying his eyes. "I guess ... you'd better explain how she dies."

* * *

The sun was setting as the two Guardians made their way back to their ships. It was a long walk, but it was a warm, pleasant evening, one of the few when the forces of Darkness wouldn't invade until later.

Madrid led Jayesh in a shortcut through the rocks, where a narrow, winding path climbed through a grove of trees. At one point, they looked down across a section of the landscape to a small gazebo built by itself on the hillside. A round plinth lay in the middle, and on this plinth was a human figure under a white sheet.

"What's that?" Jayesh asked, peering through his rifle scope. "That's an odd statue."

"It's where they laid Uldren's body," Madrid said shortly.

Jayesh's hands tightened on his rifle. That was a body under that sheet. "I thought they'd have buried him by now."

"The time loop won't let them," Madrid replied. "So there he sits, for now." Madrid walked on. Jayesh stood there a moment, gazing down at yet another failure. He couldn't heal Wren, couldn't save Kari from the effects of his wish, couldn't grant Uldren any kind of mercy.

"Phoenix," he whispered, "maybe I'm the one who's cursed. Everything I touch turns to dust."

"Don't think of it that way," his ghost replied. "Rather, there's forces in this universe stronger than you. And sometimes they have the upper hand."

"What do I do, then?" Jayesh said, gazing at that distant figure under its sheet. "Stop trying?"

"Never," Phoenix replied. "Keep fighting. I believe that good can still come out of all this."

Jayesh gave him an ironic look. "Sure."

"Not saying I know how," Phoenix snapped. "But ... somehow. Someday. You'll look back and be glad you didn't give up."

Jayesh sighed and continued up the path. "I hope you're right."

* * *

Jayesh returned to the Dasa compound and wrote a long letter to Kari detailing what he had done, trying to explain Phoenix's earlier message. He groveled and apologized, then sent the message in misery.

He lay awake a long time, trying to get a grip on himself, trying not to succumb to despair. Everything he had ever read about the reality-bending power of the Ahamkara played through his mind. One stupid accident, a thoughtless wish, and his family might pay for it for the rest of their immortal lives.

He dozed off and had nightmares about being lost in a Hive lair, wandering in circles, chasing something he couldn't see and could never catch up to.

The next morning, he had barely peeled his eyes open when he groped for his tablet to check for a message. Kari had replied. It was a few minutes before he could focus his eyes enough to read it.

" _Dear Jay,_

_So that's what happened! I was cleaning the apartment, when all of a sudden I had a vision of the most lovely place, all grass and flowers. It went away after a few seconds. It kept happening all day. It got a little annoying, actually. I was worried that I had hurt my head somehow, when Phoenix's message came. Then I got your letter a few hours later._

_Heartspark, don't beat yourself up. This is fairly minor, considering what Ahamkara are capable of. I don't mind having visions of such a pretty place. It makes me want to visit, actually. Is it really as beautiful as it looks?_

_I'll talk to Ikora tomorrow, but I have a hunch that this will wear off. From what you wrote about this Limerick, he's a young Ahamkara without much power. He won't be able to sustain this for years. A month or two, maybe."_

The letter went on, assuring him of her love, and how she longed to hold him and soothe away his fears. Jayesh missed her so much that his middle ached. He laid his tablet down and sighed, gazing at the ceiling as the morning light crept through the curtains.

Phoenix awoke and read the letter. "Oh," he said, turning with a smile emote. "She's all right. Just like Madrid said."

Jayesh smiled ruefully. "I hadn't even thought about how Limerick is a young Ahamkara. And she's fine. She likes it, even."

He flung one arm over his eyes. He lay there for a few minutes, unmoving. Then he said suddenly, "Phoenix, am I really a self-righteous asshole?"

"Maybe sometimes," Phoenix replied slowly. "But I know you, and Madrid doesn't. You mean well. Sometimes, you come off as kind of arrogant when you talk about the Traveler."

Jayesh sat up and raked his fingers through his brown hair, fluffing it. "Maybe this whole thing is a lesson in humility. It's certainly blown my ego full of holes." He grimaced and began to dress. "If I start coming off as self-righteous, poke me, will you?"

"Happily," Phoenix replied.

* * *

Elledia's death came about due to a certain chain of events. She went on patrol along a cliff side path at the foot of the Eleusinea tower. A gang of Scorn had encamped there, stationing a sniper higher on the hill. Elledia halted to battle the Scorn. No matter how carefully she kept to cover, the sniper always shot her through the temple. No healing rift would mend that.

Madrid had tried to change these events multiple times. He killed the sniper - and a different Scorn soldier shot Elledia. He hid her sparrow to keep her from going on patrol. She walked, instead, encountering the same aliens an hour later and dying to the sniper. He killed all the Scorn hours beforehand, only to have one of them spring to life from among the corpses and shoot Elledia.

On it went, loop after loop, trying and failing to break the links in the chain. As Madrid explained this in the Corsair hideout, Jayesh observed Elledia's hunched posture, the way she stood over the monitoring equipment, the way the other Corsairs patted her on the shoulder or back.

"Thank you for trying," Elledia told the Guardians. "It happens too quickly to hurt, not like poor Wren. I feel something hit me in the head. That's it."

"Do you ... see anything?" Jayesh asked. "On the other side?"

Elledia's eyes unfocused, gazing into the middle distance. "I'm always trying to leave. And I can't. There's a ... being. Like a giant, living net. It snares me and holds me back. Then I'm waking up, and it's the beginning of the next loop."

Jayesh gazed at her in fascination. "Are you in the Ascendant Realm? Or the Sea of Screams?"

"Neither," Elledia said. "I'm inside the net, and so is the Dreaming City. I'm aware of that much."

There was a short silence as the Corsairs and Guardians exchanged unnerved glances.

"The curse actually prevents souls from departing," Jayesh mused. "Fascinating. So, not even death is an escape. What are we dealing with? Is it Vex?"

The group fell to arguing possible causes of the loop. The Corsairs pointed out that Petra Venj had contacted Osiris, himself, expert on all things Vex. He had responded that only the Vex were capable of such a high fidelity time loop, but there were no Vex in the Dreaming City. It was a puzzle.

Jayesh and Madrid left to deal with the Scorn who would kill Elledia. Madrid out-sniped the sniper, while Jayesh handled the soldiers.

"These guys weren't even that strong," Jayesh observed, reloading his rifle. "And they still manage to kill Elledia every time?"

"Every time," Madrid said, putting an extra bullet through the head of each alien. Dark blue ether boiled out of each corpse. "Maybe this time we'll get lucky and outwit the curse."

"We can try," Jayesh said. He climbed a hill to the foot of the Eleusinea tower and stood gazing up at it. Fifty stories high, the top reached right out into space. The gates stood open, but he had no desire to go inside. That was where Riven had been, before Madrid and his team had killed her. Not that it had made much difference - the Ahamkara had fed off their desire to destroy her, and her death triggered the curse.

As he stood there, a single ghost in a dark pink shell flew up, scanning the tower's porch.

"Hello," Jayesh said. "What are you doing out here alone?"

"Looking for my Guardian," the ghost replied cheerfully, scanning a bush.

Jayesh watched the ghost, bemused. He'd seen unattached ghosts in the wild before, but this was the first one he'd seen who had made it all the way to the Dreaming City.

He watched the ghost scan each step, the door's lintel, and the carved pattern beside them. "Shouldn't you, I don't know, be looking for bones?"

"I like to be thorough," the ghost replied. "It took a long time to get here. I will search every inch. Have a nice day!" The ghost flew up the hill, scanning as he went.

"No wonder it's taken him so long," Phoenix muttered. "He's not even looking in the right places. But then, some ghosts are like that. They think they can apply a search pattern to the entire universe."

"You think he'll find his Guardian?"

"I hope so," Phoenix said. "We call him Pulled Pork, even though his proper name is Wil. Nice guy. He and I used to hunt our Guardians as a team, a few centuries back." Phoenix made a sound like a sigh. "I'd hoped he'd found his Guardian by now. I guess not."

"Does the time loop make him search the same places over and over?"

"Ghosts aren't affected by the time loop," Phoenix replied. "But the reset hurts." He shivered from his spot in phase. "Maybe it only hurts me."

Jayesh mentally patted him. "You have been injured before. Maybe it's the way old wounds ache when a storm is coming."

"That could be," Phoenix replied. "When the Osiris Cult got me ... and that chimera ... Maybe there's some wounds you never heal from."

Jayesh summoned Phoenix and peered into his blue eye. Phoenix gazed back, utterly trusting. Jayesh closed his hands around him and gently pried apart Phoenix's shell segments to check his core. The core still had rainbow oxidized spots from when the ghost had wielded the Dawnblade power and burned himself in the process.

"Is it these?" Jayesh asked, touching a burned spot.

"No," Phoenix replied, submitting to this handling without protest. "It's deeper inside me. Where the chimera's teeth went."

Jayesh gazed into his eye gravely. "They pierced your core?"

"Yes," Phoenix replied. "One did. It was as fine as a needle, and it hurt so awfully. I still feel it sometimes, when we've fought a lot of Taken and I'm tired."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jayesh whispered.

"I did," Phoenix replied. "I told you it bit me. But your Well of Radiance healed it."

"You did sleep for about eight hours afterward," Jayesh muttered. "I thought it was strange, at the time." He clutched the ghost to his heart for a moment. "I didn't know you were hurt like that. I should have asked. I'm sorry."

"It's all right," Phoenix said, his voice muffled against Jayesh's robe. Jayesh let him go, and the ghost floated back to his spot above Jayesh's shoulder. "I'm fine most of the time. I think it's just that Riven's monster hurt me, and so does Riven's curse."

Jayesh gave him a worried look. "You always say you're fine. Then you're not."

"I'm fine right now," Phoenix said. "I have to be your brave ghost, remember? And that means ... not complaining."

"It's not complaining to tell me you're in pain," Jayesh said gently.

Phoenix shook his head. "You're usually in way worse shape than I am."

Jayesh opened his mouth, then closed it with an expression like he'd bitten a lemon.

He didn't say much for the rest of the day, patrolling for Taken with Madrid. The Taken woman didn't appear, so there wasn't even that distraction. When they parted ways for the night, Jayesh climbed the steep hillside to the tiny alcove with the cat statue in it.

He sat beside it and stroked the warm head, watching the sun set behind the mountains. Phoenix floated beside him, watching the scenery dreamily, his eye half dimmed.

"Wouldn't it be funny," Phoenix said, "if Pulled Pork resurrected Uldren?"

Jayesh rolled his eyes. "Yeah, no. The first Guardian to see them would murder them both. Besides, you saw Uldren. You know what he did. Why would the Traveler ever grant him Light?"

"Not saying it'll ever happen," Phoenix replied. "There's as much chance of that as there is of this cat suddenly walking around."

Jayesh fingered the sculpted, pointed ears. "I want to go home."

"Why?" Phoenix said. "Besides being lonely and homesick and all."

"Well, that," Jayesh said. "And also ... something about this place, Phoenix. It's showing me things about myself that I don't like."

"Like what?"

Jayesh leaned his elbows on his knees. "When you were telling me about being hurt ... and how you downplay your pain because I need you ... Light, I'm so selfish. I'm always so worried about myself, my fears, my goals, me, me, me. And when people around me are suffering, I don't even notice." He picked up a pebble and threw it down the hill, as if trying to cast away that part of himself. "So ... I'm going to stop focusing on myself. I'm going to focus on others, for a change. No more self-righteous asshole."

Phoenix laughed. "Maybe that's why the Traveler gave us this assignment. To knock off some of your rough edges."

"Maybe so." Jayesh thought about this for a while. "If it considers us family, then this is hauling me to the woodshed for a whipping. And Light, did I have it coming." He stroked the cat statue again. "Well, back to the Dasa compound for the night. Tomorrow, we'll see if we can save Elledia."

"She'll still die," Phoenix said. "She'll just die in some way we didn't foresee."

"I'm afraid you're right," Jayesh replied.


	8. Uldren Sov, Guardian

The next day, Jayesh and Madrid patrolled with Elledia, ranging in front and behind, watching for attack on all sides. She walked in silence, clutching her rifle, her mouth set grimly.

When they reached the cliff tops opposite the Eleusinia tower, no Scorn awaited them. But just as it seemed that they'd passed the spot and Elledia might survive, a single Taken hobgoblin appeared and shot her through the head.

Madrid roared his frustration to the sky as he dispatched the hobgoblin. Jayesh knelt over Elledia, checking for any sign of life. But the bullet had passed through her skull, her life extinguished.

Madrid slung his rifle over his shoulder and walked up, grinding his teeth. He lifted Elledia's body and summoned his sparrow. He laid her across the seat and climbed on behind her. The side of his sparrow was spattered with layers of dried blood where he had carried her many times before. He flew off, heading for the cave where Corsairs slain in the curse were laid until the next reset.

Jayesh walked miserably along the cliff path, not caring particularly about speed. "Riven sent a Taken to do the job. She cheats, Phoenix! How can we beat an enemy that cheats?"

"We have to cheat better," Phoenix replied. "I think we should try your idea about running away through the Ascendant Realm. But I have no idea how to navigate in there."

"Nobody does, unless they're Hive," Jayesh said. "Ugh."

He walked along, a single forlorn Guardian, his head down. Another day, another failure. How did the Corsairs face this? And Madrid - no wonder he was so sullen. This time loop was enough to drive anyone mad. He thought through Elledia's route, the placement of the enemies, the area where the hobgoblin had appeared. Maybe they could plant land mines to kill anything that might try to attack Elledia. But Riven would probably contrive to have Elledia step on one. This curse simply couldn't be beaten. Not this way. Maybe the Traveler's plan to rescue Taken really was the best method of attack.

"I guess it's back to patrolling the Taken crossover points," Jayesh said.

"Nothing changes," Phoenix muttered. "Until it does. I'm detecting those tiny blights in the air again. Just a few."

Jayesh looked around. Here and there were black spots hanging in the air, like bits of floating ash.

"We're almost to the second week," Jayesh said. "The curse is strengthening. I've got to rescue this Taken girl so I can get out of here before week three. I don't want to go through that again."

"Madrid has," Phoenix observed. "Over and over."

Jayesh remembered his resolution to be less selfish, and bit his tongue.

* * *

Madrid caught up to him at the crevice where Taken always appeared. But none had appeared yet, so the Guardians staked it out from a distance, hiding among the rocks and little trees up the hill.

"Are you all right?" Jayesh asked.

Madrid shrugged, gazing through his rifle's scope. "Can't save Elledia. Can't save Wren."

"What if we sneaked them out through the Ascendant Realm?"

Madrid gave him a sideways look. "You know how to travel in there?"

"No. But some Awoken might. Doesn't their queen ...?"

Madrid frowned. "Mara Sov has bigger problems than the deaths of a few Corsairs."

"Is she fighting the curse?"

Madrid shook his head. "I've only been to her court one time. But enemies are coming after the Traveler. Enemies we haven't seen since the Collapse. Mara Sov is gathering forces to meet them."

Jayesh went cold, staring at his companion. "Have you told the Vanguard?"

"No. But they know that as long as we have the Traveler, there will be no peace."

Jayesh sat there, staring at nothing, thinking of Kari and Connor, and how they might fare against the Darkness's next onslaught. The thought terrified him.

Silence fell as each Guardian chewed on this problem, and that of the curse, and the Taken they were awaiting. The only sound was the breeze in the trees overhead, and distant birdsong.

Footsteps scraped on the rock. Jayesh and Madrid looked up to see a figure climbing toward them.

Jayesh groaned. "Not Limerick again."

"It's not Limerick." Madrid climbed to his feet, clutching his rifle. Jayesh stood, too.

"Hello," called the newcomer, arriving on the hilltop. He was an Awoken with pale blue skin, and wore an embroidered poncho over scale mail. His stance was open, confident, jovial. A white streak marked his dark hair, brushed fashionably to one side.

Jayesh and Madrid were facing Prince Uldren.

Electric shock seemed to crackle through Jayesh's fingertips. His instincts screamed to fight, kill, defend himself. But no - was this an enemy? He struggled to understand, staring at the scale mail, the boots, the empty holster at Uldren's hip, the yellow eyes, so clear and earnest.

And the dark pink ghost at his shoulder. The ghost. Pulled Pork. Dear Traveler, the man was a Guardian.

"Are you Guardians?" Uldren said. "I should know this place, but I'm having trouble remembering my way around."

Madrid's mouth hung open, stunned. He had hunted Uldren across the Tangled Shore, seen him open the barrier between worlds to allow Riven and her minions access to the Dreaming City. Madrid had pulled the trigger, himself. Seeing Uldren here, resurrected by the Light, knocked him winding.

"You're ... a Guardian ... too?" Jayesh struggled to say something. Anything.

"Yes, so this ghost tells me," Uldren said, nodding at Pulled Pork. "I think that's why I'm having trouble remembering."

"How could this happen?" Jayesh shouted at Phoenix inside his head. "We were joking about how this would never happen and it did!"

"The Traveler is more merciful than we are," Phoenix replied. "He was Taken, remember? No wonder his ghost had trouble piecing him together. Memory loss is common, but a fresh corpse should at least retain some. Being Taken must have wrecked his mind."

Madrid turned to Jayesh. "Kill him?" he said in an undertone.

"No," Jayesh hissed. "He's a Guardian, now."

"Remember what he did?"

"Yes, but he doesn't!"

"I should shoot his damn ghost for raising him."

"The ghost did nothing wrong!"

"He's dangerous. He slaughtered his own people."

"And he's already died for it. How many times should he die for his crimes?"

"You and your mercy," Madrid growled, but he didn't raise his rifle. He merely clutched it, uncertain.

Uldren watched them argue, his eyes bright with quick intelligence. "Something wrong?"

"Sorry," Jayesh said, forcing his stiff face to smile. "We, uh, have a difference of opinion." For a moment, Jayesh wavered between fear and the desire to be unselfish, to lay aside that fear. Could he show kindness to this man, who had murdered Cayde-6, their friend?

But this man was a Guardian, now, and no longer the same Uldren who had murdered innocent people and raised the Scorn. The Light, in its mysterious wisdom, had chosen him. Jayesh looked hard at his own faith in the Traveler and found that it was too small to allow for something like this.

Extending his hand to Prince Uldren was the hardest thing he'd ever done. The words tried to choke him on the way out. "I'm ... I'm Guardian Jayesh. This is Madrid."

"Charmed," the prince replied. "I'm pretty sure my name was Uldwyn. Or Uldren. One of those."

"Welcome to being a Guardian," Jayesh said. "Uh, Uldren. Has your ghost explained about the Traveler and the Light and all?"

"Yes," Uldren said, grinning at the ghost. "Won't shut up about it, even."

"You must learn," said Pulled Pork, emoting a smile and bouncing up and down in the air. "My Guardian must know about the world."

Phoenix appeared and flew to Pulled Pork. The ghosts drifted a little to one side, talking softly.

"Anyway," Uldren said, "I'm trying to get home. This is the Dreaming City, right?"

"Right," Jayesh said, carefully.

"I remembered that much," Uldren said. "Great. But I don't remember how to get around. I thought I was headed to the airstrip, but I've gotten turned around, somehow. Pork says my ship's not there. I need to get back to ... that other area of the Reef. Where I live."

Madrid stepped forward. "You haven't lived there in years, Uldren."

The prince sized up the burly Hunter. "I haven't, huh? I remember it well enough."

"You left," Madrid said. "Got yourself Taken. Joined the Reef's enemies. Killed your people."

Uldren frowned and shook his head. "No, I ... I wouldn't do that." He looked around for his ghost. "Did I?"

"Yes," Pulled Pork said, his segments drooping. He perked up. "But now, you are a Guardian! You can choose to right the wrongs your old self committed."

Before anyone could say anything else, reality rippled, and Taken boiled into reality in the crevice at the foot of the hill. The Taken woman was among them, smaller and more slender than the rest, but moving in exactly the same way.

More stress on top of stress. Jayesh felt like his brain was the rope in a tug of war between two Hive ogres. Here stood Uldren, once an enemy, now chosen of the Light. And there stood the Taken woman who had hurt Jayesh and escaped multiple times. He gasped a little, looking at Madrid. "She's here."

"I see." Madrid looked at Uldren. "First lesson in being a Guardian. Help your fellow Guardians. One of those Taken is an Awoken woman. Kill everything but her." He drew his sidearm and held it out.

Uldren took the sidearm with the ease of one long accustomed to weapons. He barely glanced at it - his attention was on the Taken at the foot of the hill. "I see her. Taken. Like an ugly contest where everyone's a winner."

Jayesh raised his rifle. He and Madrid began picking off the Taken, one by one. The whole pack swarmed out of the crevice and raced up the hill, shrieking and zipping here and there. Uldren lifted the sidearm and dispatched several, himself.

_Focus,_ Jayesh told himself. _Don't think about the strangeness of this situation. He's just another Guardian. Focus on the blessing you need to speak over this woman. Focus on holding her here. Focus-_

The woman spotted Jayesh and attacked him, personally, leaping at him and slashing at his face with her fingernails. He wove sideways, avoiding her attack, and caught her arm. It slithered through his grip, scorching his glove. He tried to speak the words, but her other hand whipped around and punched him in the mouth. He reeled, stunned.

"You stupid Lightbearer!" she shrieked, hitting him again and again. "Die! Suffer! Burn! Save me!"

His grip slipped. The woman wrenched away and vanished in a spiral of blackness. Silence fell.

Jayesh slumped to the ground, holding his face. Phoenix appeared and made multiple passes with his healing beam, flying anxiously back and forth.

"I've never heard a Taken say _save me_ before," said Madrid.

"I've never heard them say much at all," Uldren agreed. "Usually it's just screams. You all right?"

Jayesh nodded, unable to speak yet, his lips still too burned.

"Still," Madrid went on, "it's telling that she understands what you're trying to do. And on some level, she wants you to save her."

"It's also telling that she busted his mouth," Uldren pointed out. "No rescue without the magic words. Was that her? Or her boss?"

"Hard to say." Madrid helped Jayesh to his feet. "Off to the next point, then. Come on, Guardian. We'll get you trained." He jerked his head at Uldren, then led the way across the hill and down toward the white bridge in the distance.

"So," Uldren said, falling into step beside Jayesh, "can you save a Taken?"

"The Traveler thinks so," Jayesh replied, still rubbing his mouth. "I have a blessing of Light for her, if she'd hold still long enough."

Uldren grinned. "Crazy. And stupid. You have to out-think the Taken, not tackle them head on. They're not smart, you know. All they know is scream, hate, anger, scream, kill."

"I've met toddlers like that," Jayesh said.

To his surprise, Uldren laughed. "Accurate! Anyway, she knows you now. She went right for you. But as soon as you touch her, she tries to escape. What you need to do is -" Uldren danced a quick shuffle step on the path.

"Dance?" Jayesh said blankly.

"Try to hit me," Uldren said. "Pretend you're a Taken."

"Shriek," Jayesh said, deadpan. He swiped at Uldren, who wove out of the way. "Hate, Darkness, burn, scream, rage." He swung at Uldren each time, moving faster and faster, but it made no difference. He couldn't hit him, no matter how hard he tried. Uldren danced, twirled, and dodged every blow.

"I see what you mean," Jayesh said. "I'm afraid I don't have sweet moves."

"Any moves are better than standing there," Uldren said, panting a little. "Watch me." He demonstrated a series of steps. Jayesh imitated them, hesitantly at first, then faster.

Madrid stood nearby, watching with an expression of skeptical amusement. The sight of Prince Uldren teaching Jayesh to dance was the strangest thing he'd ever seen.

"Rose," he thought, "what in the world do I do?"

"Do?" she replied in his head. "Uldren's a Guardian now. I don't think you need to do anything."

"I'm so confused, Rosie. I can't forget the things he did. But he doesn't remember doing any of it. Look at him. No baggage. Only a few memories. No mention of his sister. But if I want to kill him on sight, what will other Guardians do?"

"Get him a helmet?" Rose suggested. "And some different gear. That royal stuff he's got on is a dead giveaway."

"Do we dare take him to the Dasa compound?"

"Maybe once it's full dark."

Nearby, Jayesh tripped over his own feet and fell over, laughing. Uldren laughed, too. "Not bad, even if I've seen mountain goats with better rhythm than you."

"What's that make you?" Jayesh asked. "A horse?"

"A stork," Uldren replied, spinning on one foot. "A graceful stork among the reeds."

Madrid broke in. "Come on, animals, we need to get going."

Madrid stalked up the path. Jayesh and Uldren followed behind, chattering like newfound friends.

"Move like that," Uldren said, "and a Taken won't know how to keep up. They're quick, but they move in straight lines. If you keep circling, it throws them off."

"Good points," Jayesh replied. "How do you know all this, if you were just resurrected?"

Uldren tapped his forehead. "Still had meat up here, my ghost said. He didn't have to rebuild everything from scratch."

"Brain meat?" Jayesh said, raising an eyebrow. "I'll bet its ninety percent ham."

Uldren shouted with laughter and slapped his thigh. "Oh! Got me!" He bumped fists with Jayesh. "Good one. I'll have you dancing, yet."

They followed the winding path through the rocky hills and down toward the white bridge. As they neared a narrow place between two cliffs, Madrid halted and held up a hand. "Scorn." He summoned a Light grenade in one hand and threw it up the left hand cliff.

It exploded with a sharp crack. Two alien bodies fell out of hiding and rolled down into the path. Their compatriots roared and hissed, raining bullets down on the Guardians. They returned fire, hiding behind rocks for cover.

After a few minutes of intense fighting, the last Scorn fell. As Madrid and Jayesh reloaded, Uldren knelt to examine the nearest dead alien. "Scorn? What are Scorn? They look Eliksni."

"Undead Eliksni," Madrid said through his teeth. "Raised by dark ether. You invented it."

Uldren gave a nervous laugh. "Look, I'm a fighter. Not a chemist. I can't invent new kinds of ether."

"You wished it," Madrid said savagely. "And Riven granted it."

"Riven." Uldren stared into space, his face going slack. For a moment he sat there, motionless, as if combing his fragmented memories. "Wasn't Riven an Ahamkara?"

"Yes."

Uldren gazed at the alien, turning its head to the side, looking into the sightless four eyes, touching the half-rotted flesh, riddled with blue ether blisters. "This was a good Eliksni, once," he murmured. "I must have wished he hadn't died. How very like an Ahamkara to grant an untrue resurrection. This is one thing I need to remember." He rose to his feet, wiping his hand on his pants. His cheerful mood had drained away, leaving him serious and worried.

Madrid continued down the path, and Jayesh followed. Uldren trailed behind, frowning at the stones underfoot.

"Why don't I remember?" he burst out. "I remember Eliksni, and my home, and my ship with the custom controls. Why don't I remember wishes - and Scorn - and - and dying?"

"You were Taken," Jayesh said quietly, as if saying it too loudly might make it happen again.

"I was-" Uldren gaped at him. "How?"

Jayesh shook his head. "I don't know. But that might be why you don't remember anything recent."

"How long was I dead?"

"About eighteen months. The curse makes time difficult to track."

"The curse." Uldren gazed across the vista of craggy mountains, little trees, and blue stone arches. "Tell me about it."

Jayesh explained about Riven and the curse. Uldren listened, often squinting, as if trying to piece together his own past. Jayesh was still talking when they reached their stakeout point at the white bridge, where a series of boulders provided cover. The three Guardians crouched there and waited.

"So," Uldren said, "this Taken Ahamkara cursed the Dreaming City when they killed her. All right. Fine. Did that have anything to do with how I died?"

Jayesh and Madrid exchanged a nervous look.

Uldren noticed. "It was bad, wasn't it?"

"It was ... I ..." Jayesh fumbled for words. He couldn't tell Uldren straight out that Madrid had put a bullet through his heart. "I guess ... you were executed. For ... crimes."

"Executed?" Uldren bowed his head for a moment, then dug one hand into his dark hair. "By Guardians?"

His companions nodded.

Uldren slowly shook his head. "And now ... I'm a Guardian." He gave his ghost a long look. "Why did you pick me, Pork?"

"Because ... because you're my Guardian," Pulled Pork said. "I've known the shape of your spark since I was born. I've looked for you ever so long. When I found you, I recognized your spark, and I was so happy. All the things you did ... they're part of who you used to be. But that man died. You're a new person, now. In the Light."

Uldren looked at Jayesh and Madrid. "Is that true for you two? Were you terrible people, too?"

Madrid didn't answer. But Jayesh said, "I died thousands of years ago. What little I can remember, I was murdered. By my brother. I think it was politics."

"So, almost the same as me," Uldren said with surprise.

"Almost." Jayesh wanted to add that he hadn't tried to destroy his own people, but he didn't actually know. He hoped not. "The point is, no matter how awful a person you were, the Traveler has offered you a fresh start. You can go back to being just as bad as you were. Or you can serve the Light and become a mighty warrior on the side of Good."

Uldren sat there for a long time, gazing at the horizon and chewing his lower lip. His ghost watched him anxiously. Finally, Uldren said, "I wish I knew why. Why did I do all those things? The only memories I have are old ones, and they're pretty scattered."

Jayesh vividly remembered this same man, broken, beaten, but proclaiming, "Everything I did, I did for her!"

"You were manipulated," Jayesh told him. "By ... others. For most of your life, I think."

"Manipulated." Uldren looked up, a little life returning to his face. "So I wasn't just a rotten person. There was more to it."

"Yes," Jayesh replied. "I'm a new Guardian, myself, so I don't know all the details."

"That's all I needed to know." Uldren's grin returned. "Right. No more bowing to manipulation, then. I can be a Guardian. The best Guardian who ever lived. Right, Pork?"

"Right!" the ghost chirped.

"Now," Jayesh said, glancing at Madrid's stony face, "there is a problem. Every other Guardian knows about the things you did. Many of them are still angry. If you go near them and they recognize you, you'll be in danger. You'll need to keep a helmet on, at least."

Uldren nodded. "Fair enough. Thanks for the warning." He drew his sidearm and twirled it. "So, I was an awful person, but I get to start over. I like that option. Looks like I had mad skills with a gun. And dancing. I wonder what else I can do?"

"You can call on the Traveler to supercharge your Light," Jayesh said. "It lets you summon a weapon of pure energy for a while." He summoned his fiery sword as an example.

Uldren flinched at the sudden flare of fire, then examined the burning sword with great interest. "You say I could do this, too? Sword!" He held out a hand. Nothing happened.

Madrid snorted with laughter. "Unless you're a warlock, Sov, you won't be using the Dawnblade."

"What do you mean?" Uldren looked back and forth between Jayesh and Madrid, taking in their different gear.

Madrid held up three fingers. "Warlock. Titan. Hunter. Three disciplines. Three types of Light. Some Guardians fall into a discipline immediately. Some don't. I've been a Hunter since my resurrection."

"I tried to train as a Titan," Jayesh said ruefully. "You see how that worked out."

Uldren looked at his ghost. "Help me out, here."

"You have the potential to be any class you like," Pulled Pork replied. "However, you have the independence of a Hunter. You might consider taking that discipline."

"A Hunter, eh?" Uldren turned to Madrid. "What do they do?"

Madrid held up one arm. Fire raced along his arm, over his hand, and formed into a golden gun. He turned it this way and that, letting Uldren examine it. "Hunters commonly summon guns, knives, and staves. It depends on your need and disposition."

Uldren held out one hand. "Gun!" Nothing happened.

Pulled Pork shook himself back and forth. "Concentrate on the Light within you."

Uldren frowned. "What Light? I don't feel anything different."

"It's like-" Jayesh began, but a ripple passed through reality as Taken oozed into being on the bridge.

The woman wasn't among them, so the three Guardians picked them off. As Madrid dispatched the last one, he said, "Could you redeem any of these Taken, Jayesh?"

"I suppose," Jayesh said doubtfully. "But why bother with a Hive thrall? It would attack us, Taken or not. Besides, my mission is for that one woman."

"Mission, huh?" Uldren said, falling into step as they headed for their next stop. "Your boss sent you out here for this?"

"You might say that," Jayesh said, the heat rising in his cheeks. He heard in his mind Phoenix mentioning how he conveyed arrogance when talking about the Traveler. One more rough edge to file away. He'd start by not bragging about being sent by the Traveler, itself.


	9. Guardians vs Guardian

They walked in silence for a while. Uldren trailed behind, muttering to his ghost as he tried to figure out how to use his Light. By the time they reached the gardens of Esila, he still hadn't managed it.

"Sorry," Uldren said. "I'm so hungry, I can't focus. Either of you have anything to eat?"

Jayesh had one ration pack left. He pulled it out of his travel pack and tossed it to the new Guardian.

"Thanks!" Uldren retreated to a bench in the shade. Being resurrected left a Guardian hungry at the best of times. Uldren hadn't eaten since his death, a year and a half earlier.

Jayesh and Madrid patrolled the gardens, waving tiny blights out of the air. No Taken had yet appeared.

"I should kill him," Madrid muttered, once they were out of earshot. "He's trouble, Jayesh. Trouble for us, for the Awoken, for the Vanguard."

"The Light chose him," Jayesh said in an undertone. "I don't get it, either, but who are we to disagree? The Light chose us, too."

Madrid grunted his displeasure. He pulled his hood a little further over his head to shade his face. "He's decent, for now. But who can say what he'll become? Can you imagine what a monster he'd have been had he been a Lightbearer, too?"

"He deserves a choice, Madrid," Jayesh replied. "Sure, he might choose wrong. If he sides with the Darkness, we'll kill him. But what if he sides with the Light? Or neither? We don't know what his future holds. And our numbers are still so thin after the Red War. There's actually a Titan out protecting ghosts as they hunt their Guardians. That's how bad off we are. We can't kill newbies just because they were bad people in their past lives."

"Spare me the sermon," Madrid snapped. "You train him. I can't stand the sight of him." He whirled and stalked toward the garden gate.

Jayesh watched him go, crestfallen. "Phoenix, what did I say wrong?"

"Nothing," his ghost replied. "Let him have his space. It's his problem, not yours."

Jayesh circled the pond and stopped to finger the paper-thin petals of an orange flower the size of his hand. He still felt winded, off-balance. Part of him wanted to send Cayde-6 a message. "You'll never guess who just got resurrected out here." And Cayde would laugh. "That swaggering peacock? A Guardian? Bring him in, I'll spring him on Zavala. Make sure to get a video of his face."

But Cayde lay entombed in the crypt where heroes of the Light were laid to rest, shot through the heart by his own hand cannon, his ghost destroyed.

"Light, I miss Cayde," Jayesh whispered. "He would have laughed so much."

"I know," Phoenix whispered. "His ghost would have teased Pulled Pork unmercifully. 'What, only a prince was good enough for you?'"

Jayesh smiled sadly. "I wonder what Kari will think. Last night I wrote to tell her, sorry, I just inflicted an Ahamkara wish on you. Tonight, hey babe, remember that insane, Taken prince who murdered the Hunter Vanguard? He's a Guardian now."

"And you like him," Phoenix added.

Jayesh leaned against a stone planter and rubbed his forehead. "That's the hardest thing. I _like_ the guy, Phoenix. If he wasn't Uldren, I'd invite him onto our fireteam and run missions when Nell can't make it. But ... he's Uldren. Just keeping him alive is going to be a chore."

Phoenix flew among the flowers, weaving between their stalks like an oversized bee. When he returned to Jayesh, his red shell was dusted with pollen. "Uh oh. Look who just showed up."

Limerick sauntered toward them from the other end of the garden, his mismatched armor giving him a clownish look. His orange eyes were fixed on Uldren.

Jayesh hurried back to the new Guardian and reached him as Limerick did.

"Hello!" Limerick said, his pale face breaking into a smile. "Who might you be?"

"My name's Uldren," the Guardian replied, setting aside the empty ration pack. "Just got resurrected."

Limerick's smile vanished. "You're Uldren?"

"That's my name, don't wear it out."

The dragon's eyes narrowed, calculating. Jayesh watched his every move, ready to summon his Dawnblade if Limerick tried anything.

Limerick's expression changed to a grin. "Well then. Call me Limerick. And you - A Guardian or a prince, his importance so immense, he impressed the Reef, now more than a thief, and we've talked of nothing else since."

Uldren laughed. "Flattery in rhyme, now? That will get you everywhere. You a Guardian?"

"No," Limerick replied.

"He's an Ahamkara," Jayesh muttered. "Watch what you say."

"Once burned, twice shy, eh, Jayesh?" Limerick said. "I granted his wish yesterday. He didn't like it."

Uldren rose to his feet. "You grant wishes?"

Limerick spread his arms in a grand flourish. "I have no Light to create weapons, and no Darkness to take souls captive. I can only bend reality to suit desire. Since you're new here, O Prince mine, I'll grant you one wish."

A horrible chill ripped through Jayesh at those words. He raised a cautionary hand. "Don't."

"I want to see him do it," Uldren said. "Can he really?"

"Yes," Jayesh said. "But he twists the wish."

Limerick coughed loudly. "Never mind him! Come now, sir. Tell me your desire."

"I wish ..." Uldren gazed around the garden, as if seeking ideas. "I wish I knew how to use the Light."

Limerick's smile faded. "That's beyond my power to grant. Come on, wish for something else. Piles of glimmer? The latest in armor?"

"Armor," Uldren said, lighting up. "A new set of Hunter gear."

Reality wavered, as if Taken were crossing through realities. Instead, out of thin air, a series of items swirled into being - a vest, leather boots, a cloak, and a helmet. They dropped to the grass in front of Uldren.

"Excellent!" Uldren exclaimed, picking up the vest and examining it.

Jayesh watched Limerick. "What's the catch?"

Limerick inhaled slowly, his orange eyes waxing golden. Color surged into his pale cheeks. "Catch? There is no catch. Well. Maybe one small thing I forgot to mention." He laughed. "But I'll let you figure it out." He walked away toward the gate, somehow bigger than he had been when he arrived.

Jayesh watched him go, then eyed the gear. "What's he done to it, I wonder?"

Uldren scooped up the cloak and put it on. "Feels all right. No spiders or explosives."

"He's sneaker than that." Jayesh sent Phoenix to scan the items.

The ghost played his beam over each piece of gear. "I'm not detecting anything out of the ordinary. It looks like good material. Similar to what the Corsairs wear."

"Good enough for me," Uldren said. He collected it into a bundle and tucked it under his arm. "So, Jayesh. Tell me about this Ahamkara. Where did he come from?"

Jayesh told him the little he knew as they strolled about the gardens, waiting for the Taken to show up. Uldren was much refreshed after his meal, and laughed often. He summoned his ghost and began practicing slight of hand tricks with him, which delighted Pulled Pork.

After a while, the Taken arrived, but the woman wasn't among them. The two Guardians dispatched them and made their way to the shores of the misty lake. When the woman didn't appear there, either, they went on to Harbringer's Seclude.

"I know this place," Uldren said, halting on the threshold. He gazed at the crystalline pillars and the statues of women holding spheres in their hands. "I used to go ... this way." He entered and took a left turn, looking about as if moving through a dream. Jayesh followed him, curious.

Uldren halted at a cross passage, pointed left and right, as if debating with himself, then turned right. He walked halfway up the hall and stopped before another statue, this one the same as the others, but only the size of a person. Uldren touched the ball in the statue's hands and spun it.

A panel in the wall behind the statue silently swung open.

Uldren turned to Jayesh with a triumphant laugh. "See? I remembered!"

"What's in there?" Jayesh asked, peering through the dark doorway.

"No idea!" Uldren stepped inside. "Let's find out."

Jayesh followed him inside. They advanced down a short, unlit passage. Their ghosts helpfully ignited their headlights, lighting the way. After a short distance, they came to a secret room. Uldren stood in the middle, turning around and around, studying everything.

There was certainly a lot to study. A desk and chair occupied one corner of the room, but it was nearly buried under stacks of open books and papers. Papers littered the floor or were tacked to the walls. Colored string had been stretched between them, marking dozens of points. A series of maps covered one wall: maps of the Reef, Earth, and the inner planets, as well as many moons of Saturn and Jupiter. Each one was covered in colored pins. The room smelled of musty paper and dust.

"This was mine," Uldren said, touching one of the maps. "But ... somehow ... I expected it to look different." He went to the desk and shuffled through the papers and books.

"Weren't you in charge of the intelligence network?" Jayesh asked.

"Was I?" Uldren said absently. "This is about as unintelligent as it gets. Look." He handed Jayesh a sheet of paper. On it was scribbled lines of what looked like poetry, but the handwriting was unreadable.

"These books are all about paracausal theory," Uldren said, lifting one and examining the spine. "Why was I so interested in that?"

Jayesh didn't answer. He gazed at the Venus map and recognized spots where the Vex had opened their gates. All were marked with a red pin. "Looks like you were researching the Vex."

"I was?" Uldren examined the maps, too, and scratched his head. "Before I died ... was I somewhat imbalanced?"

"A little," Jayesh admitted.

Uldren held up a sheaf of paper, all covered in scribbled poetry lines. "This talks about how the Awoken people are a means to an end, and their sacrifice is necessary. If I wrote this, I was mad. Stark, raving mad."

"Is that what happens when you're Taken?"

Uldren drummed the paper against his chin, taking in the maps, the pins and strings. "I've never met a Taken who was mentally stable. So, maybe. Was I ... all black and burning and such?"

"No, actually," Jayesh replied. "That's what was so frightening. You looked like a normal person, except for your eyes. And you could kind of dart around."

"What about my eyes?" Uldren asked, turning to him.

Jayesh looked at Uldren's glowing yellow irises. "The white parts were black. Sometimes the black would cover the irises, too. It was like ... maybe it only hijacked your free will sometimes?"

Uldren tossed the papers on the desk and frowned at the maps. After a moment, he said, "There must be degrees of Taken. Instead of eating my body, it ate my mind." He shrugged and shook his head. "Let's go. I'm not a fan of my past life."

They left the strange, messy little room and closed the secret door behind them. Uldren was deep in thought, and said nothing as Jayesh led them back to the hall where the Taken appeared. They loitered there, among the carved arches and glimmering crystal lights. Jayesh ran a hand along a polished column, gazing into the faceted depths of the crystal that composed it. Uldren was similar to this column - there was more and more to him the closer they looked. By contrast, Jayesh felt like the marble bench nearby. There was no depth to its streaked white surface - only a shallow pattern that pleased the eye at first glance, but was quickly ignored in favor of the surrounding grandeur.

But then, Awoken were like that, and Jayesh was only human. At least his past didn't conceal a madman and a murderer - hopefully. He'd rather not find out, either.

Taken boiled out of the wall, shrieking and burning. Uldren and Jayesh scanned them for humans - none - then killed them.

As the last Taken swirled into nothing, Uldren blurted, "Is that why I can't use my Light? Because of the things I did?"

Jayesh walked with him back outside. "I doubt it. It takes training, and you only just resurrected. You'll get it."

Uldren held out a hand and summoned his ghost. "Pork, you should have left me dead."

The dark pink ghost looked up at him. "Don't say that, Guardian. No one is perfect. All people have Darkness in their pasts of some kind or other. But you have been chosen by the Light."

Uldren nodded and patted his ghost. "So you've told me." He lifted him into position at his shoulder. "No wonder Madrid hates my guts. He must have watched me kill people."

_Like Cayde_ , Jayesh thought, but didn't say it.

The sun was nearing the western horizon as they stepped back outside. Jayesh waved away a few black motes that swirled around his face. "I spend the nights in the Dasa compound in Reefedge. Want to come?"

"Better than sleeping on the ground," Uldren replied. "The Dasa clan actually let you in? How did you manage that?"

Jayesh explained about how the head Dasa was a Guardian.

Uldren listened with growing astonishment. "No kidding! I remember the Dasas as a crime family. You didn't mess with them or their money, and they owned everything. Served them right, being Taken."

"Does anyone truly deserve that?" Jayesh asked.

Uldren opened his mouth, then exhaled and shook his head. "I don't know. I'm the last person to ask. But I remember Lord Dasa, and he was a snake. Smooth, oily, and incredibly venomous."

"The new Lord Dasa is a Hunter named Ferral," Jayesh said. "And he's a fish out of water."

Uldren laughed. "All the animal metaphors. I get it, though. Is he one of the Guardians who remember my past life and so on?"

"I don't know. Keep your hood up, just in case."

* * *

Madrid had had enough of the Dreaming City. He had returned to Reefedge, himself, and treated himself to a hot dinner in the Dasa compound's mess hall.

It wasn't as big as the Tower's cafeteria, but it was a decent-sized room, black marble floor, white walls, with tall windows admitting the sunset light. Other Guardians were scattered here and there about the tables, talking, consulting ghosts, or reading tablets. It was such a tame scene after the weirdness and stress of the Dreaming City, Madrid let himself relax. He could almost ignore the first of the four lights glowing on his arm band.

"Rose?" he thought.

"There's people in here," she whispered. "They might see me."

"Rosie, nobody is looking at us. They won't notice."

After a moment, his ghost appeared in a fizzle of Light, her rose petal shell gleaming. She looked around nervously, then up at him. "Hello, love."

Her simple, familiar greeting poked his heart. It had been so long since he had given her basic maintenance, let alone built her a new shell. He'd make sure to polish her up tonight, so she'd be the beautiful ghost she deserved to be.

"Hello, Rose," he said softly. "Are you all right?"

She twirled her shell segments. "I've been worse. Jayesh has a way of bringing out your humanity."

"Jayesh does that to everyone around him," Madrid replied with a wry smile.

Neither of them mentioned Uldren. They never did.

Madrid's smile vanished, and he sighed. "Another week, then I can see Wren again."

"What will you do when the curse breaks?" Rose said. "She'll be dead forever."

"The curse had better break before she dies," Madrid said. "That's all."

Rose looked into his eyes. "I'd save her for you, if I could."

He smiled. "You would?"

"Yes. She would be so good for you. But the voices always whisper things. When Jayesh was trying to heal her, they laughed. I don't like them."

Madrid sobered. "You still hear them?"

She turned in a slow circle, scanning the mess hall. "Not now. Only inside the Dreaming City. It's the voices that hurt you. But they don't seem to care about you anymore. Or me. Or anyone. They talk to each other, not me. I overhear them."

He nodded. Inside, sudden fear gripped him. He hadn't realized how sensitive Rose had become to the ascendant beings in the other dimension. His brush with Riven had left its mark upon his gentle, caring ghost.

"Do you think I could save Wren from them?"

"Not like this," Rose said thoughtfully. "Not healing. That's the obvious thing, and they do things underhanded and tricky. Secrets. Always secrets. If we want to save her, it has to be a bigger secret than their secrets." She turned suddenly and gazed toward the doors. "Look who's here."

Madrid glanced over his shoulder. Jayesh and Uldren had just walked in, Uldren safely anonymous under a black cloak.

"Where did he get that, I wonder," Madrid muttered.

"That cloak has something wrong with it," Rose remarked, turning to watch the two Guardians cross the hall. "I'm not sure what it is."

"Something wrong with it?" Madrid turned the other way to keep an eye on them.

As the two passed the tables, other Guardians looked up and went still and quiet. Uldren's face was concealed, but his royal armor was not. Guardians began to whisper to each other. Ghosts scanned him from a distance. They picked up his ghost's ID tag and reported excitedly to their Guardians.

"Better hide, Rose," Madrid said. "This might get ugly."

She disappeared, but said in his head, "He should have had his ghost mask his tag. New Guardians never think of that."

"Too late, now."

Other Guardians were getting up, gesturing to each other, forming a group. Seven Guardians followed Uldren and Jayesh, catching up to them at the far end of the room.

"Send an alert to Ferral," Madrid said, slowly drawing his scout rifle from its strap across his back. He slid out of his chair and stood watching, relaxed, cradling his rifle.

"Who are you?" one of the Guardians demanded.

Jayesh turned with a grin. "Oh, hello. I'm Guardian Jayesh."

"Not you. Him."

Uldren stood with his head bowed, hidden beneath his cloak's hood. He didn't answer.

Another Guardian said, "My ghost identified him as Uldren. How can that be? Are you really?"

Jayesh stepped forward, putting himself between the Guardians and his companion. "Come on, we're all friends, here. Does it matter who a Guardian was in their past life?"

"Yes," several of them said.

"No," Jayesh said. "This is a new Guardian with no memory. Understand? No memory."

"Hey you," another Guardian called. "Take off the hood. Show us who you are."

Uldren stirred, but Jayesh gestured for him not to respond. "Come on, guys," he said to the other Guardians. "It's a common name out here in the Reef, right? Probably every third kid is named after the prince."

"If he's not Uldren," said a Hunter, "then he's wearing his clothes. Come on, show your face."

"Wait-" Jayesh began.

Uldren straightened and threw back his hood.

There was a long silence. The gang of Guardians tensed, hands seeking weapons. Jayesh sighed and rolled his eyes skyward.

"My name is Uldren," the prince said to them. "If you have a problem with me, let's have it out."

At once, the Guardians drew their weapons. Whether by chance or design, all of them produced replicas of the Ace of Spades, Cayde-6's personal hand cannon. There had been a rapid trade in mods and replicas in the months following the Hunter Vanguard's fall, and not only Hunters carried the weapon.

Uldren drew his borrowed sidearm. But Jayesh summoned his Dawnblade, fire licking at his clothes, the outlines of wings appearing at his shoulders. "Don't," he said, brandishing his blade.

"Cayde wasn't your Vanguard, Warlock!" the Hunter yelled. "He was mine! And this sick bastard killed him! How dare you protect him?"

"Because he's a Guardian now," Jayesh said, his voice quiet and even. "He doesn't remember Cayde. Let's not fight each other over this."

"It's a bit late for that," Uldren said, aiming his sidearm through Jayesh's left wing.

Madrid raised his rifle, but he was too late. Hand cannons boomed. Jayesh's sword flashed, a wave of flame engulfing the nearest Hunter. People yelled.

The fight ended as quickly as it had begun. Every Guardian was down. For a moment, Madrid stood speechless, unable to tell what had happened.

Then Ferral stalked into the room, dressed in a black suit trimmed in scarlet. Three shimmering purple Void knives floated in the air before him. Three more had found their marks in the heads of the attacking Guardians.

Ferral surveyed the bodies for a moment. No ghosts had appeared - they were all hiding, afraid of what might happen next. Then Ferral rounded on Madrid. His knives whirled to aim at Madrid's face, tracking their master's focus. "What happened?"

Madrid tried not to stare at the knives. "Apparently Prince Uldren had a favorable interview with a ghost."

"A g-" Ferral scrutinized the bodies. He walked up and stood gazing down at them. Then he snapped his fingers. The knives vanished. "Uldren's ghost, get him up. Jayesh, too. The rest of you, don't raise your Guardians until those two are out of here. Understand?"

The frightened blue eyes of nine ghosts peeked out from under cloaks and backpacks. They all nodded.


	10. I never wanted you dead

Jayesh opened his eyes to see Phoenix's resurrection Light pouring into him. For a second, he was sure he had a gaping hole in his chest from somebody's hand cannon. Then he moved and the sensation faded. The back of his robe was glued to the floor by blood. He sat up slowly, unsticking it.

Nearby, Uldren sat up, too, rubbing his head. A sizable puddle of blood had formed under him, too. He surveyed himself, then Jayesh, then the other dead Guardians. "Nice people, Guardians. Great at parties."

"You two," said a commanding voice.

Ferral - although he looked the part of Lord Dasa - glared down at them. "Accompany me back to my quarters. Now."

It wasn't a request. Jayesh scrambled to his feet, and so did Uldren. They followed Ferral out of the mess hall, Madrid falling in silently behind them. As they departed, the other ghosts set to work resurrecting their Guardians.

Ferral didn't speak until they were safely in the living room of his apartment. Then he faced Jayesh, Madrid, and Uldren. "Why didn't you bring him straight to me? Don't you see who he is?"

Jayesh hadn't expected this and had no idea what to say.

Madrid said, "Give us a break, Ferral. We only found him a few hours ago."

"Excuse me?" Uldren said. "What does Lord Dasa have to do with me? Ever?"

"Everything," Ferral snapped. Power seemed to crackle off him. "Uldren, most Guardians are afforded the luxury of memory loss, but not you. Your heritage is simply too immense. Shortly before your death, you killed a man called Cayde-6. He was the Hunter Vanguard, beloved by all the Guardians. This set the entire Vanguard against you. You cannot go to the Tower, and you must give the Last City a wide berth. Understand?"

Uldren looked a little shell-shocked, but he nodded.

Ferral turned to Madrid and Jayesh. "You two are far too involved in this. I had Ikora send me your records - I know what happened. You're to return to the Dreaming City, finish your missions, and forget you ever saw him."

"Wait just one Dark-struck minute," Uldren broke in. "Who made you king of the Reef? You don't get to make decisions like this."

"I'm in authority over the Guardians out here," Ferral snapped. "Light, Uldren. Do you know what your sister will do to me if your presence causes a civil war? What happened downstairs was just a sample. It'll keep happening."

"My ... my sister?" Uldren raised a hand to his forehead.

"Queen Mara Sov," Ferral said. "If I were you, I'd stay out of her way, too. She won't be happy that you're a Guardian."

Uldren held up both hands. "What do I do, then? You've just told me not to go _anywhere_. I don't have a ship or any supplies."

"Your accounts and assets were frozen at the time of your death," Ferral replied. "I doubt they've been liquidated so soon. I'll put my lawyers on it. In the meantime-"

"I'm going back to the Dreaming City," Uldren broke in. "We have unfinished business there." He looked at Jayesh. "And you took bullets for me. Don't think I didn't notice."

Ferral started to nod. Then he growled and paced around the room. "Blast it all. Fine. The Dreaming City ought to keep you out of trouble, for now." He stalked up to Uldren and pointed a finger in his face. "I don't work for you anymore, Prince. Don't try to boss me." He spun on his heel and stalked out of the room.

For a second there was complete silence. Then someone snorted. Jayesh and Uldren turned to see Madrid with a hand over his mouth, trying to hold back laughter.

"You think that was funny?" Jayesh said.

Madrid shook his head, grinning. "He's so intimidated. I've never seen Ferral completely lose his cool. Wow."

Uldren dropped into an armchair and kicked one leg over the arm. "So, let me think. We've been here an hour. I've already been murdered, yelled at, and been told things about my past that _neither of you mentioned_."

Jayesh sat on the edge of a sofa. Madrid remained standing.

"It's a lot to dump on you," Jayesh said lamely.

"I killed the Hunter Vanguard?" Uldren exclaimed. "Madrid, you're a hunter. Do you hate me as much as those chumps do downstairs?"

Madrid shrugged noncommittally.

Uldren turned to Jayesh. "And what about my sister being the queen? That detail was conveniently omitted."

_Everything I did, I did for her._ The words echoed in Jayesh's mind. He looked at the floor rather than those piercing yellow eyes.

Madrid's voice was soft, but clear. "You were basically her slave, Sov. Neither of us want to see you go back to that."

Uldren said nothing for a while. He gazed at the far wall with a frown and jiggled his leg. "Did the queen order me to kill this Cayde-6?"

"No," Madrid said. "If she had, we Guardians would have left the Dreaming City to its enemies. You were under the influence of Riven."

"The Ahamkara?" Uldren shook his head. "Blame it on the dragon, why not? Light, I'm glad I don't remember any of this. I'll make what restitution I can, but it looks like I was resurrected a fugitive."

"Pretty much," Madrid agreed. "Change your gear and wear a helmet. Nobody will recognize you, then."

Jayesh sat in silence. None of this would have happened if the Traveler hadn't sent him to the Dreaming City. Uldren would have found someone else, and events would have been quite different. Again, he was faced with the question of whether his faith was big enough to face this. He'd thought redeeming a Taken challenged him. But grappling with the idea of an old enemy being redeemed, too? Again, Jayesh found himself falling short. When he forgot who Uldren was and what he had done, he liked the guy. But presented with the magnitude of the man's crimes, Jayesh found himself wanting to side with the Guardians downstairs. Uldren was simply too dangerous to let live, whispered his fear.

He hung between friendship and enmity, trying to grasp what was right in this situation. Always he came back to the cold, hard fact that the Traveler had chosen Uldren. Beyond all reason, it had made him a Guardian, and Jayesh found himself thinking it had made a mistake. His faith was simply too small.

Ferral returned and stuck his head through the doorway. "Feel free to have dinner with us, if you like."

Guilt walloped Jayesh like a sledgehammer. Here he sat, wrestling with vast matters of morality, while Ferral, unnerved though he was, still extended hospitality to them all.

* * *

Lethia, besides being a Guardian, was also a fantastic cook. She had baked some unpronounceable Reef dish that consisted of three types of meat and vegetable pies dipped in white sauce.

Madrid, Jayesh, and Uldren sat at a vast table with Ferral, Lethia, and their three teen sons. At first, everyone ate in awkward silence. Then Jayesh said, "Did I tell you about the time I killed a Gate Lord because my ghost screwed up?"

Phoenix, floating at his shoulder, rolled his eye. "Please, not _that_ story."

Naturally, everyone wanted to hear it. The mood lightened, and nobody talked about Uldren. Dinner became a competition in crazy stories, and between the five Guardians present, they had enough to fill as many books. The three teens listened and laughed as much as the adults.

When dinner wound down and awkwardness threatened to rear its head again, Jayesh created a cat construct out of Light and sent it running up the walls and across the ceiling. Lethia and Ferral took this as a challenge, and soon Light constructs flashed everywhere, filling the room with animals, birds, drawing mustaches and glasses on the Guardians, and writing jokes in midair.

Altogether, it was a memorable evening. Jayesh went to his room at nearly midnight, exhaustion dragging at him. Uldren was given a more secure room on the second floor, where vengeful Guardians would have a harder time finding him.

"That could have gone better," Jayesh mumbled to Phoenix as he climbed into bed. "And also worse."

"Good thing the Dasas are so understanding," Phoenix replied, landing on the pillow.

"I think they felt sorry for Uldren," Jayesh said. "He has a lot to overcome. Seems like the whole solar system knows who he is and what he's done."

"I don't know what to do about that," Phoenix said, blinking sleepily. "Maybe he'll be able to change peoples' minds himself, in time."

"In time," Jayesh agreed.

* * *

Uldren was silent and brooding the next day, when he and Jayesh flew back to the Dreaming City. But his mood might have been because Jayesh's ship had only one seat, and Uldren had to cram himself into the cargo compartment behind it.

When they landed on the edge of the lake of mist, Uldren uncurled himself from the compartment with a grunt and had to walk in circles, stamping to restore circulation to his legs.

Jayesh led the way on their patrol of the five Taken crossover points. Along the way to the crevice, they were attacked by a swarm of Hive thralls.

"Hive!" Jayesh exclaimed, shooting with his sidearm Drang, which was the first weapon that came to hand. "What are Hive doing out here?"

"What Hive always do, Jayesh," Uldren replied. "Trying to take over the world."

"I mean in the Dreaming City," Jayesh replied, blasting one thrall in the head, and punching another with a handful of fire.

Uldren wove among the thralls, stabbing with a borrowed knife, and firing from the hip with a hand cannon Ferral had loaned him. "Everything evil is headed to the Dreaming City. Why should the Hive miss out?"

The thralls put up a fight, and by the time they were all dead, the Guardians were scratched, bitten, and bleeding. They rested as their ghosts healed them.

Uldren had swapped his royal scale mail for the gear Limerick had given him. He studied it as his ghost swept him with healing beams. "You know how Limerick said he'd done something to this armor?"

Jayesh looked up. "Yes?"

"This stuff is like paper," Uldren said. "Those thralls' claws went right through it."

Jayesh winced. "So that's what he did. I knew it'd be something underhanded and sneaky."

"I'm stuck with it until we go back to Reefedge," Uldren grumbled. "New plan. Don't get hit."

They continued their journey without further incident and arrived at the crevice. The Taken hadn't yet appeared, so Jayesh and Uldren took cover in the twisted little trees up the hill.

They sat side by side in silence, watching the sun within its magnifier rings climbing into the sky. The light seemed a little more orange than usual. Tiny blights swirled on the breeze and stuck to the rocks and grass. But mostly, they sought out anything man made. The Eleusinia tower in the distance already had a smear of black down its side.

"I don't understand this curse," Uldren remarked, breaking the silence. "You say it does the same thing over and over, every time loop? And nothing anybody does can change it?"

"Right," Jayesh said. "Supposedly, Guardians should be able to change it. Our Light makes us immune to some of the effects. We can travel in and out of the time field with minimal lag, for instance."

"But they haven't been able to stop it," Uldren observed. "Something's up. Something we haven't thought of."

Jayesh nodded. "I wish I knew. All I know is, I wasn't sent here to fight the curse. I'm here to save one person. I haven't even been able to do that."

"You took bullets for me," Uldren said quietly.

Jayesh didn't answer.

Uldren looked at him. "Why did you, anyway? You're a Guardian. You knew all about me killing the Hunter Vanguard. And you still tried to talk those guys down."

"I never wanted you dead," Jayesh said, watching the crevice at the foot of the hill. "There at the end, we argued about what to do with you. You'd basically surrendered. The fight was over. And ... someone ... still shot you. I've felt guilty about it for months."

Uldren stared at him. "Let me get this straight. You stuck up for me _before_ I was a Guardian? When I was still a murdering slimeball?"

Jayesh nodded.

"But ..." Uldren laughed incredulously. "That makes no sense. You're a Guardian. You should have killed me out of hand. Light knows I deserved it. You saw my old study, all the garbage I wrote. I was insane."

"That's the point," Jayesh said. "You were Taken. How much of what you did was your idea? I couldn't make the call. I thought you should stand trial before your people - it would have been just. Shooting an unarmed man isn't justice. It's revenge."

"I would have shot me," Uldren said. "No question."

"Well," Jayesh said, "maybe the tables will turn someday. And if they do, remember this conversation."

Uldren smirked. "I might. It's not something I'm going to forget."

They fell silent again. A bird sang somewhere, defying the encroaching darkness.

Reality rippled. A gang of Taken boiled into reality, filling the crevice, climbing the sides. The Taken woman was among them.

"There she is," Jayesh said, climbing to his feet. "Think I can do this?"

"Just keep moving," Uldren said, shouldering a borrowed auto rifle. "Remember to dance. She'll want to move in straight lines."

"Dance, right," Jayesh said with a nervous laugh. "Here goes nothing."


	11. Ruith

Running through the words of the benediction in his mind, Jayesh fired at the other Taken, erasing them and leaving the woman isolated. She sprang up the hill at him, firing with whatever weapon she carried this time. Jayesh wove and dodged, and sidestepped her initial attack. Uldren had been right - she traveled in a straight line up the hill before she halted and whirled.

Uldren dispatched the other Taken, then stood nearby and watched with a bemused grin.

"May the Light shine upon you," Jayesh began.

The woman screamed in rage and filled the air with energy bolts. Jayesh avoided most of them, but took one in the right arm. Teeth clenched against the pain, he continued, "May it purge the Darkness as dross is purged from gold."

She shrieked again, covering her ears and dropping her weapon, which vanished.

Jayesh reached for that mote of Light inside him - that blessing of the Traveler. His hands began to glow. Like it or not, he was going to have to touch her.

She sprang at him, screaming like the brakes on heavy machinery, fingers curled to slash his face. Jayesh caught her wrists. The heat of her enraged hatred burned through his damaged gloves and into his palms.

Trying to push through the pain, Jayesh said, "May you enter the blessed Light and may its glory surround you. Lift up your-"

The woman tried to headbutt him. Jayesh spun her sideways, keeping his feet moving, keeping her off balance. The glow in his hands was beginning to creep into her wrists, blazing gold like two shimmering bands.

"Lift up your face," Jayesh panted, "for your redemption is at hand."

The blessing passed into her, washing away the Darkness. For a second, she vanished entirely. Then she reappeared in a blaze of Light, an Awoken woman in tattered Corsair armor. She stood there for a second, staring at Jayesh as he still gripped her wrists. Then she made a little moaning sound and sank to the ground, where she lay on her side, gasping for breath. Jayesh let her down gently. Then he backed away a few steps, not sure whether she might attack him again.

"I think you did it," Uldren remarked. "Nice footwork. Who is she?"

"I don't know," Jayesh said. "The Traveler only showed me what she looked like." He stripped off his ruined gloves and held out his burned hands and arm for his ghost to heal.

The woman was slowly sitting up, blinking around her, disoriented. "I've landed," she said, her voice low and musical. "After so long adrift." She looked up at Jayesh. "You. Your voice and Light maddened me. Who are you?"

"I'm Guardian Jayesh," he replied, kneeling to bring himself to her eye level. "I was sent to bring you back from the Darkness."

"It was costly," she whispered. "The Light paid such a price. But I'm here. The nightmare has ended." She closed her eyes and drew a long, slow breath. When she opened them again, they glowed a steady silver. She pushed back her tangled white hair. It had once fallen past her shoulders, but it was now a wild mane that frizzed about her face. She felt it and frowned. "I'll have to cut this off, now."

As she climbed to her feet, moving gingerly, as if distrusting her own body, Jayesh studied her face. Something about her seemed familiar. Had he met her before? If so, where? He didn't know many non-Guardian Awoken.

"I'm Ruith Zyrran," she said, hugging herself, as if the cool breeze chilled her. "I was Taken when Oryx attacked. How long has it been?"

"About fifteen years," Jayesh replied.

Ruith bowed her head. "So long," she whispered. She looked at the ground a moment. Then she gazed around her. "Where are we? This looks like the Dreaming City." Then she caught sight of Uldren. Immediately she snapped one arm before her face in an Awoken salute and bowed. "Prince Uldren! Forgive me, I didn't know of your presence."

He raised a dismissive hand. "At ease. Seeing a Taken be rescued was ... educational."

Ruith straightened, studying him anxiously. "The Queen! What of Mara Sov? Was she Taken?"

Uldren shook his head. "I'm not ... exactly sure." He gave Jayesh a questioning glance.

"She's alive," Jayesh said. "But she's not here." That was the extent of his knowledge on Mara Sov's whereabouts. He had a vague idea that she had a throne world and Madrid had spoken to her there, but he didn't want to explain something he didn't understand.

On the other hand, he had completed his mission. As Ruith peppered Uldren with questions he had forgotten the answers to, a sense of elation began to fill Jayesh. He'd completed his mission. He'd used a Blessing of Light to redeem a Taken, and he hadn't even been hurt that badly. He could go home again and stop being so homesick for Kari and Connor. Maybe other Guardians would be able to wrest more Taken from the Darkness. Think of how many hundreds or thousands of people they could restore. And the armies of Taken would diminish.

"Phoenix," he thought, "notify Madrid that I've rescued the Taken woman. Have him meet us at our ships."

"We sure don't have room for passengers," Phoenix replied. "Hopefully he's not too busy fighting Hive. I'm picking them up all over the Dreaming City right now. Lots of ghost chatter about them."

Jayesh turned to Uldren and Ruith. "Let's go back to the ships. We'll get you out of here to someplace safer."

"It's not safe?" Ruith asked, bewildered.

"It's cursed," Uldren said cheerfully. "I'll tell you as we go."

Jayesh let Uldren tell the story and didn't bother to correct him when some details were wrong. He was finally escaping the Dreaming City. He couldn't wait to shake the dust off his shoes and run for Earth.

They reached the misty lake shore where Guardians landed their ships. Madrid was there, his scout rifle in one arm, waiting with a disgruntled expression.

"About time," he said as they approached. "They need help at the Monastery. We should take care of that before-"

"Madrid?" Ruith breathed.

He broke off and stared at her, taking in her matted hair and shredded clothes. "Yes?"

Ruith pressed a hand to her mouth. "It can't be. You died ... so long ago. After the Emergence."

Madrid's eyes widened. He shrank back a step. "How do you ... you know who I am?"

"Great Skies," Ruith said, her voice dropping to a murmur. "You came back as a Guardian. Of course you wouldn't ... Madrid, you're my brother."

The blue tone of Madrid's face went ashen. "You're my ... and you were Taken?"

Uldren broke in. "Why don't we conduct this touching reunion elsewhere? The edge of an airfield isn't the most intimate of surroundings."

Madrid seemed to wake up. "Oh. Right. I'll give you two a lift back to the ... Light, you're not a Guardian." He nodded at Ruith. "You can't escape the time loop the way we can."

Jayesh slapped his forehead. Of course, why hadn't he remembered that? If they put Ruith on a ship and tried to fly out, she'd either die in transit, or disappear from the ship and reappear in the Dreaming City on the next loop.

"How about the Corsair hideout in the Strand?" Jayesh suggested. "They have those caves where she could stay."

"All right." Madrid summoned his sparrow. "Ever ride one of these?"

"I had one, yes," Ruith said. "How long have you been a Guardian?"

"One hundred and eighty-eight years," Madrid said, mounting the sparrow. "Hop on."

"That long!" Ruith said, sliding into the seat. "I never knew. I've missed you all these years. But you don't know me, do you?"

Madrid revved the engine and shot across the misty lake without answering.

Jayesh summoned his own sparrow and jerked his head at Uldren. "Looks like we're not done just yet."

As they flew through a crystal-studded tunnel that led down to the Strand, Jayesh clung to his hope of returning to Earth. But a nagging fear began to eat at him - that this was more complex than he had thought, and his mission wasn't over. The Traveler had asked that he redeem a Taken, right? Well, he'd done it. He wasn't supposed to look after her once she was free.

But his conscience bothered him, anyway.

The Corsair cave was in a cliff high above the misty lake shore. They'd staked it out as a base of operations because it stayed the least damaged through all three weeks of the curse. By the final day of the time loop, all buildings were unlivable masses of tarry black Taken corruption.

The cave wound deep into the mountainside with plenty of rooms and nooks for people and gear. It was most busy early in the morning and close to sunset. Now, at mid morning, there were only a few Corsairs manning the field equipment. When the Guardians walked in with Ruith, the Corsairs stared, dumbfounded.

"Hey, everyone," Madrid said, one hand hovering awkwardly near Ruith's shoulder. "This is Ruith, my, uh, my ..."

"His sister," Ruith said, gazing around. "You. I know you." She pointed to the Corsair in the back. "Jenna?"

"Ruith?" the other woman murmured, stepping forward cautiously. "It can't be. You were Taken. I saw it happen."

The other Corsairs felt for their weapons.

Jayesh hurried up, hands raised. "Whoa, hold it. It's all right. I used a transcendent blessing of Light to bring her back."

"You?" gasped Jenna. "But that's impossible. Our Techeuns could have restored a Taken - maybe - but they're all Taken, too."

"It's not impossible for the Traveler," Jayesh said. "It sent me. But it wasn't easy to do."

"Yes, I hurt him," Ruith said, touching Jayesh's arm with a sad smile. "I'm so glad you didn't give up."

For a moment, she gazed at him with sorrow in her eyes. With a jolt, he remembered her words about the Light having to pay a high price for her. What did that mean? He'd have to ask her later.

The Corsairs eyed them both, distrustful. "This could be a trick," said one.

"It's not part of the time loop," said another. "This has never happened before."

Ruith spread her arms. "Scan me. I carry no traces of Dark energy any longer. I can feel it in my being."

Jenna approached her with a blue orb in both hands, its surface swirling with code and images. She passed it up and down Ruith's body, watching the orb's readings. Then she stood for a moment, spinning the strange circles and lines across the orb's surface. "Her readings are in the normal range. No Taken energy at all." She pushed back her helmet visor and peered at Ruith. "Your mind, though. You were under the command of a greater being. That alone should have broken your mind."

Ruith touched her temples. She closed her eyes and stood there for a moment, meditating. "I was broken," she whispered. "Crushed and twisted, glorious suffering. Power and pain. But the Light came and freed me. It healed me, though I'll carry the scars forever." She rubbed her arms, as if such damage showed on the outside.

"But Oryx is dead," Jenna said. "Who controlled you?"

"The secretive sister," Ruith murmured. "She of the whispers and the lies."

"Savathun," the Corsairs murmured.

Jayesh watched all this, taking mental notes for the Archives. Aside from the achievement of restoring a Taken being, he was beginning to have faint inklings of the strategy involved. The Traveler had not chosen Ruith at random. So he watched and listened, keeping his mind open, trying to catch the possibilities as they drifted past like snowflakes.

The Corsairs led Ruith into the depths of the cave to replace her tattered gear and find her some food. Madrid, Uldren, and Jayesh loitered in the front room, Uldren with his hood pulled over his face.

"I guess I'll be headed home," Jayesh said, just to make conversation.

Madrid looked at him sharply. "Now?"

"I've done what I was supposed to do," Jayesh replied.

"But what about Wren?" Madrid exclaimed. "You told me you'd help try to save her on the next loop."

Jayesh hesitated. He had given his word, hadn't he?

"Besides," Madrid went on, "the fighting gets hotter from here on out. After we put down the Hive incursion, the Taken invade in earnest. The only strategy that makes any difference is to use the Blind Well to draw them in."

Uldren gave Madrid a sharp look. "You've been in the Blind Well?"

Madrid nodded. "It's dangerous as hell, but we Guardians dare use it when the Awoken refuse."

Jayesh looked from Madrid, to Uldren, and back. "What's the Blind Well?"

"It's a trans-dimensional rift generator," Madrid replied. "It was built shortly after the Awoken arrived here, and the secret of its construction is long lost. It was last calibrated when Oryx took over, and they still don't know exactly where it's trying to open a rift to. We've spent whole cycles pouring Light into it to charge it."

Jayesh gathered in more possibilities, like catching snowflakes in his outstretched hands. "Have you ever opened a rift with it?"

"Small ones," Madrid replied. "They last about twenty minutes."

Jayesh turned to the cave mouth and gazed out across the Dreaming City, trying to put the snowflakes together like puzzle pieces. After a while, he shook his head. "Getting there's not the problem. Navigating is."

"What are you talking about?" Madrid snapped.

Jayesh turned to him. "The only way a non-Guardian can leave the time loop is to escape through the Ascendant Realm. But I can't navigate that dimension. I think, if we knew how, we could go anywhere in the universe."

"You're right," Uldren agreed. "And you're also insane if you think you can pull it off. I've been to the Ascendant Realm. Compasses don't work. Computers crash. There's no celestial bodies to steer by. You navigate by instinct. Great for ascended beings. Not so great for us."

"Wren dies on day two," Madrid added. "That's not enough time to charge the Well."

Jayesh looked thoughtful and didn't answer.

In his head, Phoenix said nervously, "Jay, I know what you're thinking. Don't do it."

"I never said I'd actually do it," Jayesh replied inside his head. "It's just one option."

Aloud, he said, "Uldren, have you figured out your supercharge yet?"

"No," the prince replied. "Not like I've had much time to experiment."

"Well," Jayesh said, "let's go fight Hive. And experiment." He gestured for Madrid to lead the way.

Madrid gave Jayesh a long look. "What are you planning?"

"Something crazy," Jayesh replied. "Something secret."

In reality, he had the scattered pieces of a plan and no idea how to make them work. But if he didn't know what he was going to do, the Hive gods and Riven couldn't predict his actions, either.

* * *

The Hive's only foothold in the Reef was a crashed tombship in the Tangled Shore. They had opened a portal from there and streamed into the Dreaming City. The thralls attacked anything in sight, but the upper ranks - the Knights and Wizards - sought out and pillaged the Awoken buildings. They invaded sacred spaces, stealing everything they could lift. The Guardians hunted them and returned the stolen items to the Corsairs. The same relics were stolen from the same places every time loop, so Madrid knew exactly where to go and what to look for.

Uldren tried and tried to call upon the Light, but couldn't seem to do it. "It's not working!" he exclaimed in frustration, after trying for five solid minutes to summon a simple grenade. "We're sure I'm a Guardian, right? I really do have Light powers?"

"Ask your ghost!" Jayesh replied, firing his graviton lance from behind a nearby pillar. "He's your connection with the Light!"

A gang of thralls charged Jayesh's position. He shot some at point blank range, and laid about him with a fistful of fire. Oblivious, Uldren sat glaring at his open hand, willing a grenade to appear.

Madrid appeared and lent his knife to freeing Jayesh from his attackers. "Get with it, kid!" he snapped at Uldren. Then he dashed back across the hall, firing at a knight.

Jayesh scrambled into cover with Uldren, who had found a hiding place between two huge stone urns. "Focus on your ghost, not your hand. He'll show you."

Uldren growled in frustration and closed his eyes.

Jayesh reloaded his rifle and happened to glance down. A statuette stood between the two urns, back in the shadows. A cat striped with all the colors of cats.

"Hey there!" Jayesh whispered, stroking its head.

Uldren glanced at it. "That's just a manifestation. Leave it. It can't help us."

"I found a different one in a cave," Jayesh said. "I like them." He rubbed the thin, sculpted ears. "I have to go back to work, kitty. See you later."

Uldren rolled his eyes.

Jayesh ducked out of their hiding place and returned to fighting. Uldren gave up on Light powers and added his own weapons to the fight.

They killed the thralls and knights that had crept into the stone halls of the Seclude. But as soon as Madrid plucked the stolen relic from the curled hands of a slain Knight, a black Hive portal curled open in midair. Out of it dropped a wizard, filaments swirling around it like a robe. After it crawled an ogre.

Ogres were hulking monsters, about ten feet tall, with powerful limbs, and a compound eye that could kill with its gaze.

"Don't look at the eyes!" Jayesh exclaimed. "Shoot them!"

"How am I supposed to shoot something I can't look at?" Uldren growled between shots.

Across the room, Madrid shot the wizard through the head, dropping it to the floor. The ogre howled in rage and turned its deadly gaze in his direction. The stone smoked everywhere it looked. Madrid dove for cover behind a pillar and kept it between himself and the monster.

Jayesh and Uldren poured lead into the ogre's thickly-muscled back. It barely seemed to notice this, but after a while, it wheeled and trained its eye in their direction.

For a split second, both Guardians looked into the monster's eye. The bleak power of death roiled inside it, burning cold, dragging them toward death and silence. It was a Hive death song turned psychic.

Jayesh reeled backward, hit a wall, and slid to the floor. Uldren ducked, cursing, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes. "Pork, correct my aim." Eyes shut, he lifted his rifle.

"Up!" his ghost chirped in his head. "To the right! There!"

Uldren fired three times. The ogre roared in pain.

"Put out half his eyes!" Pulled Pork cheered. "He's stamping toward us. Aim higher. That's perfect. Fire!"

Jayesh blinked his seared eyes and saw the ogre galloping toward them on all fours, jaws open, black blood dripping from its compound eye. He scrambled to his knees and unloaded his graviton lance into its face.

The ogre roared, swerved sideways, and crashed into a stone pillar. It staggered, groped at its ruined eye, then collapsed to the floor, its whole head breaking into smoldering green flames.

"I did it with my eyes shut!" Uldren exclaimed. "That was incredible! Pork, fist bump." His ghost bumped his shell into the proffered fist.

Jayesh scrambled to his feet and stood still as Phoenix healed his scorched eyes. "Ogres are my least favorite aliens to fight. Seriously."

"I could have taken him out solo," Uldren bragged. "My ghost is the perfect wingman." He closed both hands around his ghost, opened them to reveal they were empty, then pretended to pull the ghost out of the collar of his cloak. Pulled Pork danced up and down, delighted.

Jayesh laughed. "Soloing an ogre with your eyes shut? I'll let you take point next time." He was going to add more, but he turned to see Madrid standing there, glaring at them.

"If you two clowns are done showing off, we have work to do."

"Never done," Uldren said, tossing his ghost in the air and catching him. "But lead on, Guardian. We'll kill the next batch blindfolded."

Madrid stalked off, his every movement declaring his disgust. Jayesh and Uldren took a moment to search the bodies of their foes for ammo or loot, found little, and followed Madrid.

"That could have gone badly," Jayesh thought to his ghost in the privacy of his head.

"I know," Phoenix replied. "It's too bad Uldren has such a reputation. He's a daring fighter. He could teach the Vanguard a thing or two."

"They'll never accept him," Jayesh thought, checking his rifle's magazine. Again, he had mixed feelings, friendship and enmity, laughter and fear. But mixed into them was an undercurrent of sadness - sadness that it had to be this way, that so few Guardians would look past their own grief and prejudice.

"If nobody else will help him," he told Phoenix, "I will. I don't know how, exactly - but I want him to have a chance. And the solar system is a big, lonely place when you're alone."

"What will Kari think?"

"I shudder to think."

Jayesh had only sent her hasty notes over the last few days to assure her that he was still alive. He hadn't told her about Uldren, mostly from a fear of putting the information into writing. What would her opinion be? She had been there at the end, too. She had argued for Uldren's execution, even though afterward, she had regretted it as much as Jayesh had.

Telling Kari - trying to help Uldren, Wren, and Ruith - his mission was completed, but it had only become more complex. Had the Traveler known this would happen?

Somehow, he had a feeling that it had. And it had sent him anyway.


	12. With you all the way

Madrid fought Hive with restrained fury. He felt like a building whose foundation had shifted, setting the whole structure askew.

First, Jayesh had showed up. The Guardian Riven had asked for, personally, and who Madrid had tried to kill. He had apologized, but one couldn't make up for something like that. He'd noticed Jayesh watching him, sometimes, clutching his rifle. Their friendship would never be what it once was.

Then - Uldren Sov resurrected as a Guardian. Madrid couldn't look at him without seeing Cayde's battered face, hearing the machinery in his Exo body grinding to a halt, watching the light fade from his eyes. The immaterial human spark that had occupied the mechanical shell had gone, following his murdered ghost into the void. And his murderer had been granted the Light. It wasn't fair. The Traveler was wrong and stupid, just a machine that chose Guardians indiscriminately. Uldren was a warrior, and that was why it had chosen him. That was all. Every joke he made only reminded Madrid of Cayde. Surely Sov was faking the memory loss, since he had retained so much. Of course, he'd pretend the most dangerous memories were gone, so as to remain above suspicion. But Madrid knew better.

Last, there was Ruith. Taken. Restored. And claiming she was Madrid's sister. Madrid didn't know what to do with that. Acknowledge their kinship and move on? Ask her about old times he didn't remember? How had he died, that she mentioned still missing him? He didn't want to be curious. It was against Vanguard policy to obtain information about one's past life. And yet ... Ruith looked so much like him. So many questions occurred to him. But at the same time, he didn't want the answers. His life was complicated enough.

So he fought Hive with intense focus because it was something he could control. Aim, fire, reload. Aim, fire, reload. He dodged blows from thralls, wove around a Knight's sword, and popped acolytes before they could draw a bead on him. Once in a great while, a claw would scratch him, or an energy bolt would cut through his armor. His ghost healed him at once, always alert.

Madrid led his fireteam - he carefully didn't think about having Uldren Sov as a teammate - through the dim, echoing halls of the Harbringer's Seclude. They cleaned out armies of Hive who were looting or looking for places to build nests.

There came a natural lull between fights. Madrid always used this downtime to rotate weapons and refill magazines. Jayesh and Uldren followed his lead, all three of them perched on a balcony overlooking a sunny courtyard the Hive hadn't yet reached.

"Madrid," Rose said in his head. "Are you all right?"

"Perfect," he thought.

She hesitated. "Do you think ... Ruith is lying?" She had been thinking about it, too. "She was Taken, and ... her mind may not be right."

"Always possible." Madrid hoped this was the truth, although he doubted it. He'd seen Ruith's eyes light up with recognition. She'd known the other Corsairs, and they had known her. She was sane and rational. He pointed this out to Rose.

She made a sound like a sigh. "Yes, well. I've heard of Guardians meeting friends and family out here. It's always awkward, not remembering. What do we do?"

"Nothing," Madrid replied. "I died a long time ago. She's moved on. I'm a Guardian. We have nothing to discuss."

"You're not even a little curious?" Rose ventured. "To talk to her a little?"

"No." But it was a lie. Dammit, he _was_ curious. What did Ruith remember about him? Had he always been a loner who craved freedom and the wilderness? Burdened as he was with the weight of revenge and guilt, it might be refreshing to hear of an earlier time when he'd had neither.

"Maybe I'll talk to her tonight," he added. "I'll introduce you. Good thing I polished you up, right?"

"Right," Rose murmured, sounding intimidated. "What if she doesn't like me? I mean ... I resurrected you. I sort of ... stole you away. Now I'm a symbol of the person she lost."

"You've really thought about this."

"Yes." Rose's voice was almost a whisper.

"I'll make sure she knows how special you are," Madrid assured her. "She can't help but like you."

"I hope so."

Madrid loaded his scout rifle, feeling as if that simple conversation had drawn back the curtain from a window he'd forgotten about. Light seemed to stream into his mind - he liked Rose. He'd made himself forget that. His adorably shy, caring ghost, who had even worked a rocket launcher for him. How had he ever let himself neglect her?

The rest of the day, he fought Hive with a little less attention. A corner of his mind was busy designing a shell for Rose that resembled one of the strange, rare flowers in the gardens of Esila.

* * *

That evening, Jayesh and Uldren returned to Reefedge. But Madrid went to the Corsair cave in search of Ruith.

She was still there, dressed in fresh Corsair armor, working at a terminal as if she'd never left. Lots of Guardians were in the cave, some camping, others simply there to confer with friends before heading to the Dasa compound for the night. There were whispers about Uldren in every corner. Nobody seemed to quite believe that he'd turned up as a Guardian. "If he is, then where is he?" was a common refrain.

Madrid ignored this and went to Ruith. "Hey."

She looked up from her console and smiled. "Hello, Madrid."

"Eat dinner with me?" he suggested. "I've got decent stuff from Reefedge."

"All right," she said, pulling off her helmet. Her white hair had been hacked short, the worst of the tangles cut off. "Let's sit outside. Less crowded."

The two sat on the rocks outside and watched the sunset as Madrid opened his pack. He always carried several pounds of sandwiches as field rations - ration packs became so tiring. Ruith accepted one, and they ate in silence for a while.

Madrid held out a hand and coaxed Rose into appearing. "This is Rose, my ghost. Rose, meet Ruith, my sister."

"Pleased to meet you," Rose said, half-looking at Ruith, then flying to Madrid's shoulder, where she hid behind his head.

Ruith smiled. "She's adorable. And she looks like a flower! I've never seen a ghost like that."

"I built her shell myself," Madrid replied.

Ruith nodded. "You always were good at building things. When we were younger, you built toys. Later, you engineered gear." She plucked a shoulder strap on her armor, indicating a clip that held both ammo and a communication device. "This clip was your design."

Madrid blinked at it. This made so much sense. "Was I a Corsair?"

"Technically," Ruith replied. "You had the training. But you took scouting assignments that sent you all over the solar system. You'd come back with wild stories, let me tell you."

Madrid nodded. This was the sort of thing he'd expected to hear. "That hasn't changed much. I'm a Hunter, now, and I still take solo assignments."

Ruith laughed. "Of course you do. I was more of a naturalist. You'd bring me plants or animals to study. We spent years on Earth, cataloging rare species. That was where ..." Her face fell. "Where we lost you."

"What happened?" he asked.

Ruith gazed at the orange sunset without seeing it. "We always met for the night at an arranged spot. One night, you didn't show up. I waited up all night. At dawn, I went looking for you. We both had dogs, and my dog tracked down yours. You and her had both been killed by Fallen. I found you in a ring of bodies. I don't think any of them escaped, but you died of your wounds." She met his eye. "Your dog was a Queensland Heeler named Rose."

Madrid laughed. "Now that's funny."

"You named me after your _dog_?" Rose exclaimed, popping out of hiding to glare at him indignantly.

He reached up and stroked her shell. "I didn't know that at the time. I opened my eyes to see you right there, in your plain little shell, and your voice was so sweet. Rose was the first name that came to mind. It was important. Now I know why."

Ruith studied his face, her silver eyes missing nothing. "You've aged," she observed. "I know Guardians don't age much. But you ... has it been such a hard life?"

He shrugged. "Being a Guardian is tough. We fight for the survival of the Last City, and there's been plenty of times we thought we'd lost it all. When Ghaul attacked and took the Traveler ... took our Light ... that was hard."

Ruith's eyes widened. "You lost the Light? Tell me!"

He did, talking long after the sun went down and the stars came out.

When they finally parted ways for the night, hours later, Madrid realized that Ruith had been his close friend. And that friendship had been picked up again, as easily as slipping on a comfortable shoe.

At least he had one relationship he hadn't ruined.

* * *

_Dear Kari_ (Jayesh wrote),

_I've been trying to think of how to write this to you. This isn't a secure channel, and I don't want this information falling into the wrong hands. But ... I've been helping train a new Guardian out here. You and I were present at his death, eighteen months ago. I hope you know who I mean._

Jayesh stared at the words on his tablet, then turned it around to show Phoenix. "Is this too obtuse?"

"I worry it's too plain," Phoenix replied. "Anybody with two brain cells to rub together knows where you were eighteen months ago."

Jayesh bit his lip and gazed at the message. Then he resumed typing.

_I successfully restored the Taken woman. She's a Corsair named Ruith, and she's Madrid's sister. He's been weird about it, too. But then, Madrid has been scary weird since I arrived. He's also not fond of our new Guardian. Because reasons._

_All this is to say, I may have to ride the time loop another three weeks. We're in the second week right now, with the worst week yet to come. I've promised to try to save an injured Corsair at the beginning of the next loop. But we'll see what happens._

He followed this with a lot of personal thoughts, longing for Kari and home. Then he sent the message and sat on his bed, staring into space.

"Jay," Phoenix whispered, watching him. "I know what you're planning. It frightens me."

Jayesh smiled briefly. "Frightens you? I'm the one who will be doing it. If the Blind Well works like I think it does, the trip could kill me outright."

"I know." The ghost paced back and forth in midair. "Have you thought about what Riven might do?"

"No," Jayesh said. "I'm more worried about Limerick turning up and ruining everything."

"Maybe that's what you should want," Phoenix said. "What if you need him for a wish?"

Jayesh started to say no. But he returned to gazing into space, thinking. "The Blind Well is only the beginning. Do you think a wish ...?"

"It would work," Phoenix said, spinning his shell nervously. "But he would try to destroy you with it. And our position would be so precarious."

Jayesh didn't answer. He scrolled through the messages on his tablet without reading them, over and over.

"I'd ask you not to," Phoenix said, "but when has that ever stopped you?"

Jayesh looked up with a quick grin. "Big brother's always right, but little brother gets into trouble anyway."

"Big brother wishes he could beat you up, sometimes," Phoenix laughed. "Maybe pound some sense into that head of yours."

"I have plenty of sense," Jayesh said, pretending to be offended. "It's just that some of it is nonsense."

Phoenix twirled his shell as he laughed. "That explains so much. Like when you come up with a nonsense plan like this one. Speaking of which, you didn't tell Kari any of it."

"She'd worry." Jayesh sobered. "Besides, I don't even know if I can pull it off. If the Blind Well doesn't cooperate, that's the end of the plan."

"Will you take Uldren and Madrid?"

"Light." Jayesh dug his fingers into his hair. He pulled his fingers through it several times, combing it into ridges. "I only planned to take Wren. And maybe Elledia. But there's every chance we just ... won't make it. I don't want to cost the Vanguard three Guardians."

Phoenix gazed at him steadily. "But ... it's acceptable to cost them one Guardian?"

Jayesh and his ghost stared at each other. They each knew exactly what the other meant, and what Jayesh intended to do. Neither of them wanted to say it aloud.

"Guardians get away with a lot," Jayesh said, forcing a smile. "I probably won't die. And you'd better not." He spun Phoenix's segments with one finger. "You can always bring me back."

"Not where we're going," Phoenix said softly.

Again, they gazed at each other, not daring to speak the plan aloud.

"Am I being selfish?" Jayesh said.

"No," Phoenix replied. "You're being heroically stupid."

"Then talk me out of it!" Jayesh exclaimed. "Do you know a better way to save these Corsairs from dying in the time loop? I'm all ears!"

Phoenix started to speak. He flew in circles, instead. Finally, he returned to his Guardian. "There's no other way. But it's such a long shot. I thought ..." He looked down. "I thought I could face anything you did. I used to be brave. But Jay ... after the chimera ... I'm so scared. I think I'm broken, somehow. We've done so many dangerous things together, but I can't do this. Not after the chimera."

Jayesh gazed into his ghost's eye for a long time. His poor brave ghost, still injured, trying to pretend he wasn't deathly afraid of headlong flight through the Ascendant Realm. But the breaking point had come. And Jayesh was ready to thoughtlessly, selfishly, drag his ghost through hell one more time.

"Then," Jayesh said slowly, drawing a deep breath to steady himself. "I want you to stay behind."

Phoenix's pupil contracted to a dot. "What?"

"If the Blind Well works, then I want you to stay here. I'll make the run without you. If we make it, I'll come back and find you."

"And if you don't?" Phoenix said in a small voice.

Jayesh forced a smile. "Then ... feel free to find yourself a new Guardian."

Phoenix stared at him, his pupil still a shocked dot. Then he flew here and there, nearly bumping into the walls, as if his consternation had blinded him.

Jayesh re-calibrated his mental plan-daring the Ascendant Realm with no ghost, no connection to the Light at all. The odds spiked upward into the impossible. Inside, he quivered and whined. He didn't want to die out there, lost in outer darkness without a single star to steer by.

_Maybe the Blind Well won't work_ , he thought. _Or maybe the Corsairs will refuse to make the run. Or maybe Limerick will grant me a wish to make it through._

Or maybe they'd all lose themselves out there and be devoured by the nameless things that lurked in the void.

Beneath all this, his will repeated the refrain, _You have to try. To give up now would be cowardice._

He realized he was rocking back and forth, arms folded. He lay down instead and turned out the light. Phoenix landed on the pillow with a thump. "Jay," he whispered, "I don't know what to do. I can't let you go alone. But I'm so scared."

"It's all right, little light," Jayesh replied, stroking him. "We'll decide what to do when it's time. If you can't do it, you have an out. I won't think less of you if you stay behind."

"I'll think less of me," Phoenix replied, "if you don't come back. I'll spend the rest of my life wondering where you went, and if I could have saved you."

"We'll decide later," Jayesh told him. "Now, rest. You're tired, and hurt in a way I can't fix."

Phoenix said nothing else, but his eye-light remained on for hours after Jayesh had fallen asleep, gazing into the night, battling his fear and this terrible choice.

* * *

A floor above Jayesh, Uldren sat in a chair in his expansive room, elbows on the windowsill, gazing out at the hills behind Reefedge City. The Milky Way paved a blue path across the sky, studded with asteroids like tiny crescent moons. His ghost floated beside him.

Uldren had told no one about the scraped, raw feeling inside his mind. He'd awakened with it at his resurrection, along with the sense of voices, or one voice, every word it spoke scraping and cutting his psyche. He could barely tolerate his ghost's communication.

After so much fighting that day, he found his head aching and a ringing sound in his ears.

Pulled Pork swept him with a healing beam. "It's the psychic damage," he told his Guardian. "It's like using a damaged muscle - overuse breaks it down. But this is your mind. You've been very focused all day. Now, relax. Rest. Let your mind wander. I have to heal gently."

So Uldren sat and stared out the open window, breathing the cool night air, thinking of nothing in particular. Every so often, the minuscule warmth of Pork's healing beam touched the side of his face and head, where the hair was short. Each time, the headache diminished a little.

After a while, he found himself chewing on the problem of not being able to use Light. He could shoot an ogre while blindfolded, but he couldn't summon the smallest flicker of Light.

"Pork," he muttered, "do you think the psychic damage is why I can't use any powers?"

His ghost gave him a troubled look. "It could be. I know of no other Guardians who resurrected with such horrors present in their mind."

"Horrors?" Uldren said, turning his head to gaze at his ghost.

Pulled Pork looked at him in silence a moment, then turned to study the darkened landscape outside.

"Pork," Uldren said. "You know something."

"I know nothing," the ghost said, without looking at him. "The damage - it's the remnant of great stress, and horror, and pain."

"From being Taken?"

Pulled Pork's eye shut off and he drooped. "Perhaps," he whispered. "The other ghosts ... they speak of the events prior to your death. Jayesh's ghost, Phoenix, carries a wound like yours. From the same source. It can be healed, but it is delicate work."

"Wait," Uldren said. "Jayesh's ghost has psychic damage? Does Jayesh?"

"I don't know," Pork told him. "That's between him and his ghost, and I do not like to pry. But Phoenix has told me of the pain he carries. I was consulting him about you, meaning no disrespect. He confided that what happened to you happened to him and his Guardian, too. The only healing technique that works is gentleness. So I am being as gentle as I can."

"What happened?" Uldren asked.

Pork looked away.

Uldren caught the ghost in two fingers and rotated him until their eyes met. "Wil. I'm asking because I need to know. _What happened_?"

The ghost hesitated. "Well. Phoenix said ... there was a monster. It tried to devour you. And Jayesh. And Phoenix. Guardian or not, it made no difference. It fed on Light. I fear that ... perhaps ... it did some harm to you that I can't repair, despite having resurrected you. You are Awoken. You have Light and Darkness besides what Guardians possess. That is the part of you that it fed upon."

"Yet another thing those guys forgot to mention." Uldren released the ghost and returned to staring out the window. Here was an event he was thankful he couldn't remember. Being devoured by a Light-eating monster? No wonder his mind was damaged.

"Will I ever be able to use Light?" he asked plaintively.

"Yes, of course!" the ghost exclaimed. "Once this damage is healed. I am mending it a little at a time, day by day." He underscored this by tracing Uldren's head with another healing beam, like being brushed by a feather.

Uldren said nothing for a long time. He watched the stars and let his ghost heal him, gently, over and over. He was essentially crippled. Everyone hated him for crimes his old self had committed. It was difficult not to feel cynical.

"If my fate is to be a fugitive," he muttered, "then I'm going to Earth."

"Why?" Pork asked.

"Hospitable environment," Uldren said, counting on his fingers. "Plenty of ruins. Food to scavenge. A City where I can be anonymous. And the Fallen. I can get along with the Fallen."

Pork considered. "They don't like Guardians."

"I'm barely a Guardian," Uldren replied. "A different term might fit me better. Lightbearer. Risen. But not Guardian. I'm allowed to guard nothing and no one."

He looked up to see his ghost gazing at him with a mournful tenderness. "Lightbearer you shall be," Pork said. "We'll go into exile together."

Uldren nodded. "But first, I'm going to help Jayesh with his Blind Well scheme. He's a good guy, but he has no idea what he's getting himself into."

Pork emoted a smile. "I'm with you all the way."


	13. I need to make a wish

The Blind Well occupied the center of a hollowed-out mountain. Madrid took Jayesh to see it a few days later, as the second week of the curse was fading into the third.

The Well had a central tower and five sub-wells, set around it like the petals of a flower. The central well was a tower of glass and metal, its interior rippling with light and flowing symbols. The sub-wells were egg-shaped machines with curved seams, suggesting that they cracked open when active. Optic crystal conduits ran through the floor, connecting each sub-well to the main one.

The Blind Well was housed in a polished crystal hall similar to Harbringer's Seclude, with pillars supporting the arched ceiling high overhead. When Madrid and Jayesh entered, their footsteps echoed in the quiet space. Voices murmured at the central Well - a group of Guardians clustered around it, hands outstretched, doing something with Light that Jayesh couldn't make out.

"It takes a strong burst of Light to activate the Well," Madrid said, watching. "The Blind Well then begins piercing through realities. Many evil things crawl through - I've seen Hive, Scorn, and Taken, depending on the power given. No Vex, though."

"And no Fallen," Jayesh murmured, watching the other Guardians work. "How long does it take?"

"Five minutes to half an hour," Madrid replied. "I wish I could say their motives are altruistic. But when the Well reaches max power, it drags things through from other realities or times, we don't know which. People have found glimmer-made armor lying around, or ancient weapons, or relics that we can't identify. I'm afraid most Guardians come here because of greed."

Jayesh shook his head. Some Guardians were like that. "How long does it take to open a rift?"

"At least twice a day for three weeks," Madrid said. He nodded at the symbols swirling inside the main well's tower. "See how active it is? It's at seventy percent charge. At one hundred percent, it opens the gate upstairs."

He led Jayesh up a flight of spiral stairs to a circular room with three watchful statues at three points of the compass. The fourth point held a great crystal ring, currently flickering with energy.

"This is the gate," Madrid said. "They'll have it open in another day or two."

Jayesh gazed pensively at the huge ring. "Why does it take three weeks, when the Taken have those five crossover points they use every day?"

"Because of the way it's calibrated," Madrid replied. "This used to lead to Mara Sov's throne world. Sometimes, when the Well is fully charged, you can get there for a while. But that reality was so damaged by Oryx, the Well can't keep the portal open for long."

Jayesh considered. "Why don't we just jump through at a crossover point?"

"Guardians can," Madrid said. "But Corsairs have trouble without a proper portal. They're not as strong as us."

Madrid knew of the plan, but it was dangerous to discuss it aloud, especially in this place, where any being might be listening through reality's veil. They wouldn't be able to ask Elledia or Wren if they wanted to try Jayesh's escape plan, because they would stay dead until the time loop reset, the following week.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Madrid asked.

Jayesh nodded. "I might save lives."

Madrid's gaze was direct. "And if you all die out there?"

Jayesh shrugged. "It's no worse than dying here. Maybe they'd be outside the curse, and they could depart."

"And you?" Madrid said in a low voice.

Jayesh hadn't told anyone his agreement to leave his ghost behind. Phoenix was waffling on whether to go or not, and Jayesh didn't want anyone to know. With or without his ghost, survival was going to be tricky. "I guess ... if I don't come back ... look after Kari and Connor for me."

Madrid's face shifted, eyes widening. "You're not serious."

"I plan to come back!" Jayesh snapped. "I'm going to see this through, and succeed. Backup plans are just that - backup."

Madrid turned away and stood looking at the gate, watching the Light play over its edges in fingers of lightning. Neither of them spoke.

"Great," Jayesh thought to Phoenix. "He just remembered how much he despises me."

"I don't think that's it," Phoenix replied.

Jayesh hunched his shoulders. "Sure it is. This is hard enough already. Why not make it a little bit worse?" He paced to the top of the stairs and stood gazing down into the Blind Well.

There was a flash of Light from the Guardians gathered in the center. Then, suddenly, the room dimmed, the air turning murky. The only clear space was around the central well. The murk didn't quite reach to the top of the stairs - the well's aura was confined to the lower floor. Perhaps the Awoken had designed it that way, to aid observation.

Things stirred in the murk and closed in on the waiting Guardians. Jayesh squinted. Hive - thousands of them, appearing out of the air itself. They attacked the Guardians, who fought back with the speed and skill only super humans could muster.

Madrid came to stand beside Jayesh, looking down at the battle. They watched as the well's power shifted to each sub-well in turn, the Guardians racing to defend them from the oncoming hordes. Then the air cleared. The Well surged with a pulse of power that made Jayesh clutch the railing to remain standing. The portal on the second floor swirled with Light.

As if summoned by that pulse, two ogres the size of trucks appeared out of nowhere and attacked the Guardians.

"Jayesh," Madrid said quietly, "nobody asked you to do this."

"I promised to help Wren," Jayesh said. "I can't heal her. This is the only other way I can think of."

Madrid watched the other Guardians focus fire on the ogres. "Jayesh. I've already cost you too much. Don't throw away your life like this. Kari needs you. Your son needs you."

Jayesh knew this. His heart hadn't stopped crying for them since he left. He turned suddenly, glaring at his erstwhile friend. "And you, Madrid? What do you need? To watch the woman you love die over and over? To stay in this blasted time loop until your Light fails? This is your fight. Why aren't you the one trying the impossible?"

Madrid pointed at the arm band holding him prisoner. "That's why." He leaned against the railing and bowed his head. "Because if I try to leave, it'll kill me over and over. Believe me, Jayesh, I'd have tried this already, if I could. But ..." He clenched his fists. "I can't."

Downstairs, the ogres fell, slain. The Guardians whooped in triumph.

Jayesh said softly, "That's why I have to try. Because you need Wren to live. And you can't save her."

They stood there, side by side, watching Light flow through the Blind Well as the Guardians hunted among the bodies of their enemies for otherworldly loot.

"I know how to charge the well," Madrid said at last. "The other Guardians will help me. Save your Light for the run. I need you to make it." He lifted his head, a little life returning to his yellow eyes. "And talk to Ruith. She might know the way."

Hope cascaded through Jayesh's soul. Ruith had spent fifteen years Taken. If anyone knew the Ascendant Realm, she would.

"Let's go," Jayesh said, and clattered down the marble stairs.

* * *

While Jayesh and Madrid consulted with Ruith, Phoenix slipped away by himself.

He was sick with fear and ashamed of himself for being afraid. Just being near the portal, even unopened, threatened to push him into a catatonic state. He'd be no good to his Guardian like that. It also wouldn't help if he lost control and began screaming in the middle of the Ascendant Realm, which he worried he might do.

So Phoenix flew in search of Limerick.

Could a ghost make a wish? As far as he knew, Ahamkara didn't care who made the wish, as long as the desire was strong enough to be fed upon.

"What is my desire?" Phoenix asked himself. "That Jayesh won't die, of course. But that's too easily twisted." He rephrased it and rephrased it, looking at loopholes, thinking of all the ways the words could be misconstrued. But then, what if he let Limerick think he had won? And what if the twisting of the wish played in the wisher's favor?

Phoenix tracked the dragon down into Rheasilver, where Limerick was lurking under a bridge, watching a Corsair scout fight a pack of Hive thralls. He spotted the lone ghost at once.

"Hello!" Limerick said, his pale face brightening in a smile. "You came to face the big, bad dragon all alone?"

"I need to make a wish," Phoenix said, with a sense of leaping off a cliff.

Limerick sprang to attention, his orange eyes widening. "A wish? From a ghost? That's new. Tell me, spawn of the Traveler. What could you possibly desire from me?"

Phoenix told him.

Limerick laughed, and as he laughed, he fed and granted the wish. "You take a bold risk, little star. You don't know the outcome of your desire."

"No," Phoenix said, trembling as Light was wrung from him. "But I need it."

"Very well," Limerick said. "Be off. And take care of your Guardian, in the time that remains."

Phoenix crept back to Jayesh, still frightened, still ashamed, and very, very tired.

* * *

"I roamed all over the Ascendant Realm," Ruith told Jayesh. "But that's like saying I roamed all over Earth's moon. It's vast, with many places in it. And position is relative. Nothing remains in place. You travel where you expect to go. Or where you're sent."

Jayesh nodded, hanging on every word. "Could a Guardian get around in there?"

She sighed. "If you had the instinct, perhaps. Where are you trying to go?"

"Reefedge," Jayesh replied. "It's right here, in the Reef, but it's outside the time loop."

Ruith nodded. "I crossed through to Reefedge a few times. Never of my own volition, you know. I went where I was commanded to go. There's a seam in reality at the Dasa compound. Quite handy."

"Could you go with us?" Jayesh asked. "I have no idea how to get around in there."

Ruith gazed at him thoughtfully. "Have you been to the Ascendant Realm often?"

"A few times. Not enough to know it well."

"You're not Awoken," Ruith mused. She nodded at Madrid. "He would have a better chance, simply because of his ancestry. So. I think we'd better secure you a tincture of Queensfoil."

Jayesh had heard the Corsairs talk about Queensfoil and had no idea what it was. He must have looked baffled, because Ruith explained. "Queensfoil opens the mind to higher realities. We call it 'becoming Ascendant'. The Techeuns invented the tincture to aid in walking between realities. Not everyone can be a Guardian, you know."

"Is it safe?" Jayesh asked. "Will I get addicted or something?"

Ruith laughed. "Some Awoken do. Guardians tend to hate it. I doubt you have anything to worry about. There's nothing chemically addictive, no, but some people come to rely on the opening of the mind."

Jayesh drew a deep breath. "I'll try anything at this point. Set me up. We have to leave on day one of the time loop, which is the week after next."

"I could have a tincture made by then," Ruith said thoughtfully. "You're certain you want to do this?"

Jayesh nodded.

"All right," Ruith said. "Stoke your Light, and keep your ghost close."

Jayesh looked around for Phoenix just as the ghost flew in the cave and came to hover at his shoulder. "He always sticks close."

Phoenix gave him a mournful look and said not a word about where he'd been.

* * *

When the time loop started over, Jayesh held Phoenix, trying to shelter him from its effects. Uldren, who had been eager to see the time loop in action, stood on a rock nearby, watching the sun set behind the huge blights that covered everything. Madrid was already on his way to Wren's outpost and wasn't with them.

The time loop reset, a ripple like a wave slicing through reality, rolling it back. The orange, corrupted atmosphere faded back into a peaceful, blue one. Jayesh felt only a shift in the air as the micro blights vanished. But Phoenix flinched in his hands. Uldren doubled up, clutching his head.

"Are you all right?" Jayesh said.

Uldren slowly straightened, shaking his white-streaked hair out of his face. His nose was bleeding. He wiped it with the back of one hand and forced a smile. "There's things out there in that time loop."

Pulled Pork flew around him, healing him with anxious flicks of his beam. The nosebleed stopped.

Jayesh watched as Uldren closed his eyes, basking in the healing. "Uldren ... have you learned to use the Light yet?"

"No." The prince opened his eyes, which glowed brilliant yellow in the twilight. "My ghost says I have psychic damage from some monster."

"Oh," Jayesh said. He looked down at Phoenix. "Oh no."

Phoenix floated into the air and whispered fiercely, "It's not your fault."

Jayesh said nothing, only gazed at his ghost, then his friend.

"Why would it be your fault?" Uldren said, studying Jayesh's hunched, defeated posture.

"I should have healed you more," Jayesh said.

The words seemed to hang in the air, strange and shocking. Uldren blinked. "Wait ... you tried to heal me? The old me?"

Jayesh nodded and gazed at the sunset.

"Weren't we enemies?"

Jayesh shrugged. "Look, I don't want to go into it. I healed you and they killed you anyway. Isn't that enough? And you're still damaged, even now."

"You didn't feed me to the monster," Uldren laughed nervously. "Did you?"

"No," Jayesh said. But the way he said it ignited a million questions in Uldren's head.

"Maybe you should tell me exactly how I died."

"Maybe I shouldn't," Jayesh countered. "You know enough. You're still recovering. Let it stay buried with your old life."

Uldren studied him a long moment, thumbs hooked through his belt. Finally he shrugged. "Whatever. I'll get the story out of you someday. Speaking of. I'm going with you on your crazy quest."

Jayesh had a vivid memory of the chimera emerging from the portal, wrapping its tentacles around the enthralled prince. More of those lurked in the Ascendant Realm. And so did Riven, dead, Taken, Ascended dragoness. She had known Uldren, wormed her way inside his head, and fed on his desires as she granted him wish after wish. What would happen if he met her again out there, not even able to defend himself with Light?

"No," Jayesh said.

Uldren laughed incredulously. "No? You're going alone?"

"I hope to avoid notice that way," Jayesh said. "You ..." He trailed off. Explaining his reticence meant detailing Uldren's insanity. "You shouldn't go out there."

"How're you going to stop me?" Uldren said, smirking.

Jayesh stalked up to him and jabbed a finger in his chest. "I will not be held responsible for your final death. If you go, it's on your head, not mine."

"Hey, hey," Uldren said, holding up both hands. "Cool it, Jayesh."

Jayesh turned his back and stood with his arms folded, watching the sunset fade from the clear sky.

"That knife cuts both ways," Uldren said quietly. "I don't want to be responsible for your death, either. And if I don't go with you, and you die out there? I'll feel like I pulled the trigger, myself."

Jayesh gritted his teeth. He couldn't accept, couldn't refuse, couldn't explain why this friendship with the risen Awoken Prince was probably a bad idea in the first place. But it had just ... happened.

What was more, Uldren would see Jayesh part ways with Phoenix at the gate. Jayesh didn't want anyone to know about that - they wouldn't understand Phoenix's terror.

Without a word, he walked away down the hill. After a moment, Uldren followed, letting him have his space.

They walked all the way back to Jayesh's ship this way, each man alone with his thoughts. Jayesh's dread of what he must do was approaching panic. The more he suppressed it, the more it manifested as bad temper. One more night in an ordinary bed. Tomorrow night, where might he be? Lost in the Ascendant Realm? Dead, his Light quenched forever? Would Phoenix wait outside for years, hoping that he'd return? And what about Kari? Light, he had to tell Kari something. If he succeeded, fine, he'd go home as planned. But if he failed, he'd simply vanish without a trace. He couldn't do that to her - not after the Hive had harvested her first husband.

He flew himself and Uldren back to Reefedge, going through the motions of takeoff and landing, lost in his own mental torment. Once he was alone in his little room, he sat and stared at a blank message on his tablet for a long time.

_Dear Kari, If I don't come back, I just wanted to say ..._

_Dear Kari, I'm trying to save the lives of two Corsairs from the time loop, but ..._

_Dear Kari, by the time you receive this message, I'll be in the Ascendant Realm, trying to smuggle two lives past the notice of Riven ..._

_Dear Kari ..._

He tossed the tablet aside and dropped his head into his hands. "What do I say, Phoenix?" he whispered.

Phoenix floated nearby, his shell segments hanging open in misery. "Just tell her you love her. You don't have to explain why."

Jayesh slowly picked up his tablet again.

_Dear Kari, I'm about to try something risky. If it doesn't work out, I just wanted to say that I love you. Here it is: I love you._

At that moment, he wanted to be home more than anywhere else in the world - home with Kari and Connor, snuggled together on the sofa, watching some silly show. Laughing. Happy. Safe.

He sent the message. Then he slid into bed and curled into a ball under the blankets. When Phoenix landed on the pillow, Jayesh tucked the ghost under his chin like a stuffed animal. And if Jayesh cried, Phoenix would never tell a soul.


	14. Silly little mice

The next day, an odd group met at the Blind Well.

Madrid arrived, holding hands with Wren. Her face was composed, but a certain tightness around her mouth belied her nervousness. Elledia came, too, clutching a rifle like a security blanket.

Ruith arrived, carrying a small bottle of clear liquid, and followed by a crowd of Guardians. The Guardians laughed and talked, playing with their ghosts and weapons. They had come to try to give the Blind Well three weeks' worth of charge. If it succeeded, as Cayde had once said, there would be a ton of loot.

Jayesh and Uldren waited upstairs, near the portal. Uldren wore a helmet that obscured his face, and wrapped a cloak around himself to conceal his royal armor. It was the only thing he wore of Limerick's gift.

Madrid and the Corsairs entered the portal room, and terse introductions were made. Elledia and Wren both stared at Ruith as she explained about being Taken and restored.

The Guardians, downstairs, began pouring charge after charge of Light into the Blind Well. The air clouded with murk and enemies. Upstairs, the portal ring began to flicker with lightning.

"Phoenix," Jayesh thought. "Here we are. Will you stay or go?"

"I want ..." The ghost could barely speak from terror. "I want to stay."

"Stay here, then. Don't change your mind and follow me. You'll never find us. Promise me."

Phoenix appeared above his outstretched hand. "I ... I promise."

Jayesh tried to smile, but couldn't manage it. He gently pushed Phoenix away, sending him to hide at the top of a statue. His heart trembled at this separation - venturing into danger without his friend - but he couldn't make Phoenix suffer any more. Not after all he'd been through.

"Jayesh!" Ruith approached him, holding out the bottle. "The Guardians have already boosted the Well past fifty percent. The portal will open soon. Drink this."

He took the tincture of Queensfoil and pulled out the stopper. It smelled awful - a cross between cheap alcohol and day-old lawn trimmings. He poured it down his throat and tried not to gag at the overpowering green taste. It burned. Coughing a little, he handed the empty bottle back to Ruith.

She took the bottle and studied him as she set it aside. Her silver eyes seemed to glow even brighter. Jayesh looked around. Every Awoken in the room shimmered with Light, their eyes blazing. He looked for Phoenix and saw the ghost as a spark of bright fire. Uldren, too, burned a dull orange under his cloak. 

"Being Ascendant is weird," Jayesh said. "I see Light and Darkness everywhere."

"It's working," Ruith said approvingly. "It should last for four hours. That should be enough time for us to traverse the pathways." She examined his face, leaning uncomfortably close. "Such Light you have, Guardian Jayesh. You must have been resurrected with the first Risen."

He forced a smile. If she thought he was seven hundred years old, he wouldn't correct her.

Downstairs, the Guardians added more Light to the Blind Well. The portal suddenly flashed to life, a swirling black hole appearing in its center.

"Go!" Ruith yelled. "It won't stay open long!"

There was no time for hesitation or doubt. Jayesh and the Corsairs hurled themselves through. A few seconds later, the portal flickered and died.

Phoenix shuddered. His connection to Jayesh had just been cut off. Instead of his Guardian's warm, living spark, he felt nothing but cold emptiness. He would never know if his Guardian lived or died - he was suddenly as alone as he had been the moment the Traveler created him.

* * *

Jayesh, Uldren, and the Corsairs landed on a stone platform in the Ascendant Realm. It had once been part of a balcony, complete with a railing and a small tree in a planter. But the tree was long dead, and the railing was broken and sagging. There was no sky, no horizon, only deep blackness. The darkness, itself, had tangible presence, like fog. It drifted across the balcony, sometimes obscuring it. The atmosphere was cold and very dry.

But Jayesh could see through the fog, a little. The balcony's stone seemed to glow faintly. This must be why he had needed the Queensfoil.

"We're really doing this?" Elledia said, aiming her rifle this way and that. "You think we can evade the curse like this?"

"It's better than dying over and over," Wren pointed out. "Last time, I was in agony for twenty-eight hours. Anything is better than that."

Ruith walked a little apart, her silver eyes shining as she peered about in the gloom. "This way," she said, stepping over the broken railing.

Jayesh expected her to plummet into infinity. Instead, a path of broken pavement appeared under her feet, glittering with crystal veins. He gestured for the Corsairs and Uldren to follow her, and brought up the rear, gripping his graviton lance and keeping watch.

"Was this Mara Sov's throne world?" Elledia asked.

"Yes," Ruith replied. "I prowled it often. A beautiful place it once was, but the Hive God Oryx has destroyed and befouled it. However, we are using it as a stepping stone to elsewhere. Stay close."

They followed the floating pavement, which had gaps in it. They leaped across these, not daring to look down.

Jayesh automatically reached for his Light to aid in these jumps. With a shock, he found no Light, no Phoenix, no Traveler. He'd never been utterly cut off before. All he had was the Light he had brought with him, enough for a single supercharge, or a couple of healing rifts.

"You all right?" Uldren muttered to him, as they waited their turn to jump a gap.

Jayesh nodded. "Fine, fine."

Uldren gestured to him. "Look at yourself."

Jayesh looked down. To his horror, his feet and legs were outlined in burning black and white, as if he'd been Taken. The rest of his body had faded into shadow. He gasped a little. "What's happened to me?"

"You're Ascendant," Uldren said with a laugh. "It'll wear off. Right now, you blend in with this place. Be glad."

He didn't mention that the Light that always flickered in Jayesh's eyes had become an alarming blue flame.

Jayesh tried not to look at himself as they journeyed onward. No ghost, no Light, and he appeared Taken. They hadn't even encountered enemies, yet, and already the nightmare was enfolding him.

They followed the broken pavement for a while. Then they came to a part of a temple suspended in the blackness. A ring of pillars surrounded a central space with a raised dais in the center. A great tree had once grown atop this dais, but it was dead, its branches reaching for the sunlight it would never see again.

"How did trees ever grow here?" Jayesh asked.

"A good portion of the Dreaming City is in the Ascendant Realm," Wren told him. "It drifts between realities. But it wasn't like it is now. Oryx destroyed the Light."

Ruith held up a hand for silence. The four of them stood still, watching her, as she slowly walked around the tree, counting the pillars. She pointed at a space to their left, beckoned to them, and slipped between the pillars.

Another path appeared, this one a mere scattering of boulders floating in the murk. They shifted and rolled as each person stepped on them. This led to a tense procession having to leap, balance and scramble for footing.

Somewhere in the middle of this, Jayesh began to sense that they were being watched. He had no attention to spare for anything except the next boulder, yet the hair on the back of his neck began to prickle. _Traveler, grant me courage. I haven't the strength to face the beings out here._

Silence. No connection. Jayesh took a firm mental hold of himself and continued onward.

From the final boulder, they leaped onto a long stone pathway, once adorned with glowing orbs every few feet. But most of them were broken, only a few remaining to give a weak, flickering light.

"This way, hurry," Ruith whispered. "They're aware of us."

So they had all sensed it. Jayesh hurried along with the group, following the pathway, scanning the gloom about them. He saw nothing, but the thick, misty darkness could conceal monsters ten feet away.

Ruith increased their pace to a jog. What did she sense? Jayesh didn't want to know.

Nearby, Uldren flinched and pressed one hand to the side of his helmet.

Not daring to speak, Jayesh touched his arm and gave him a questioning look. Uldren shook him off and made an impatient gesture. _I'm fine._

Uldren had a ghost who could block out infernal whispers. Jayesh had no such protection. But for the moment, the lurking powers weren't interested in him. Still, he missed Phoenix with a sharp pang. His friend, his little light, was gone, utterly severed. Jayesh was alone in a way he hadn't been since his resurrection. Alone and without Light. He tried not to think about it. He had to get through this, had to save the lives of Wren and Elledia. That was all that mattered.

The pathway reached an intersection. Ruith paused, studying each direction. They waited, peering about for attack.

Elledia pointed in silence. They all looked. Far away, but not far enough, stood a single Taken thrall. It perched upon some other piece of floating architecture, lit only by its own burning outlines. It stared at them, unmoving, an eye for a greater power.

Uldren raised his rifle and shot it. The report was strangely muffled in that place. The thrall vanished in a swirl of burning black.

"Now we've done it," Jayesh muttered.

"They already knew," Wren whispered. "We stand out like beacons. They taste our Light."

Ruith seemed to figure out where to go. She took the left hand turn. "This way. Quickly."

"How much farther?" Jayesh asked.

"Distance," Ruith replied. "Some. Maybe more, if they add to our route."

This told Jayesh nothing, yet everything. Distance was relative in this dimension. Some travel was required, yet even that varied, depending on the humor of the powers that occupied the space.

They seemed to walk for hours. There was no time in that place, no day or night. But Jayesh's legs grew tired, and hunger began to growl inside him. His biological clock said that they had been in the Ascendant Realm for hours upon hours. Yet onward they went, Ruith picking her way through the fragments of the Dreaming City with only a short pause now and then to remember her travels as Taken.

Uldren's hand grabbed Jayesh's shoulder. Jayesh looked around with a start. Uldren pointed.

High above them and to their left hung a glowing purple eye. Or was it an eye? It was ringed in teeth. Burning white tentacles radiated outward from it. A Taken Servitor - a chimera. There was no way to tell how close it was, but the slow rippling of the tentacles implied monstrous size.

Uldren gave Jayesh a terrified, questioning look. _Was that the monster_ ...?

Jayesh nodded.

Neither of them said a word, only hurried after Ruith. The chimera didn't follow them, but it turned to watch as they passed. Jayesh hated to turn his back on it - it was too easy to imagine the stealthy touch of tentacles curling around him.

The pathway narrowed to a stone rail a foot wide. They walked single file along this rail, hardly daring to look up for fear of missing their footing. When the rail bent to the right, up ahead, one of the Corsairs suddenly swore. Jayesh and Uldren looked up.

Looming over the rail up ahead was an Ahamkara skeleton the size of a house. It was posed like a museum display, jaws open, claws uplifted, poised to attack anything that passed along the rail beneath it. Every bone was fresh and brown, not yet bleached by age. The teeth and tusks glittered ivory white.

A female voice emanated from the bones. "What scampering mice have entered my domain?"

Ruith stood frozen, mouth open, staring up at the skeleton. They clustered behind her, peering up at the remains of Riven.

The skeleton didn't move. "You have nothing to fear from me, little mice. I'm dead. Dead at the wish of six Guardians. I see Guardians among you. Silly little mice."

Ruith bolted along the rail, beneath the skeleton's claws. Nothing happened. The rest of them followed, passing beneath the shadow of the bones. They didn't stir, but its consciousness watched them.

Once they had left it behind, Jayesh glanced back. The skeleton had vanished. This unnerved him so badly, he nearly missed his footing. Uldren steadied him, and paused for a second, scanning the darkness for the skeleton. "Eyes up, Guardian," he whispered to Jayesh. "She's toying with us."

They ran along the rail for a few minutes. The skeleton suddenly loomed up out of the darkness again, this time in a roaring position, the head thrown back and jaws wide. But it didn't move.

"I see your plan," Riven said. "You're stealing lives from my curse. Clever. But did you not think of who you might encounter here, O sisters mine?"

They didn't answer her and hurried by the skeleton. As before, as soon as they passed it, it vanished.

Jayesh kept his thoughts carefully blank, his head down. If Riven noticed that he had no ghost and was vulnerable, she wouldn't hesitate to exploit him. Uldren seemed to be holding up well, but it was hard to tell with his helmet on. If Riven had recognized him, she gave no sign. Her attention was focused on the Corsairs. For some reason, she wanted them dead.

The skeleton reappeared ahead of them, the skull bent so close to the rail, they would have to duck to avoid the curving tusks.

"You are doomed," Riven whispered as they passed. "Lives I demand, and lives I will take."

The skeleton vanished and reappeared ahead, arched over the rail, so they had to pass beneath its ribcage.

"You feel no fear?" Riven crooned. "Oh, mighty Awoken? I feel your desire to live and escape me, little mice. But there is no escape. I push your exit further away each time. You will run forever. Until you die. Or ... until you wish."

Ruith halted and turned to their little group. "She's manipulating us," she whispered. "We should have arrived by now. This rail isn't that long."

"What do we do?" Wren whispered.

Ruith looked at the waiting skeleton. "I don't know. Guardians, could you distract her?"

"I will," said Uldren, before Jayesh could move. Uldren pulled off his helmet and faced the skeleton. "Hey Riven. Remember me?"

"Prince Uldren Sov," Riven said, her voice thick with glee. "Once, my dutiful puppet. Now a Guardian. This is delightful. I shall feast upon you. Come, what do you desire?"

Ruith led the Corsairs in a mad dash beneath the skeleton. Uldren and Jayesh followed. The skeleton didn't move, but that didn't mean it couldn't. As before, it disappeared and reappeared ahead of them, the head alongside the rail, the empty eye socket poised to examine them.

The Corsairs hurried by the skull, but Uldren stopped to face the eye socket. "I'm not beholden to you, monster. And neither is anyone else."

"They wished," Riven whispered. "They wished to see the end of the curse. I granted that wish by ensuring their deaths. Each death is the end of the curse as they know it."

"You sick bitch," Uldren snarled. He raised his rifle and fired into the eye socket. The bullets pinged inside the skull.

The skull whipped away into the darkness with horrifying, snake-like speed. Out in the void, something wailed.

"She didn't expect that," Jayesh said with a grim smile.

The rail was clear for a few minutes as they ran along it. It curved to the left, and Ruith sped up, beckoning. They were nearing their destination at last. In the distance, a point of blue light shone steadily through the darkness. An exit portal.

"What's this?" Riven whispered inside Jayesh's head. "This one has no ghost, yet is Ascendant. You take an awful risk, you know."

Jayesh didn't answer her. He kept his eyes on that portal, forcing his body to move faster.

"What do you desire?" she whispered. "Escape? Freedom? To gain the lives of your friends? I see you, Lightbearer. You have been granted far more Light than any Risen your age should possess. Does it not weary you to be such a favored slave?"

Jayesh tried to block out her voice, the way Phoenix did. "I had this conversation with Limerick. It's all lies."

"Who in existence would say that?" Riven purred. "The Traveler? It keeps you as a pet slave. Of course it would refute the knowledge of the Ahamkara."

The portal drew closer. The five of them were running, now, sprinting along the rail toward that gate back into reality.

"Still, you puzzle me," Riven mused. "Why does a Guardian give up its ghost? Such a foolish action. Could it be that you two disagreed?"

Jayesh didn't answer, tried not to think. She was probing his mind, picking through his thoughts like a raven sorting through sticks and leaves to find a shiny pebble.

"No, that is not it," Riven continued. "Was the ghost a coward? Ah, yes, I'm getting warmer. The ghost was afraid of the Ascendant Realm. And what's this? What love you have for him, Lightbearer. Love! Such a treasure. Devotion and desire coiled together like the springs in a clock. You really must stay and chat with me."

They reached the portal. But as the others leaped through, a hard, bony claw hooked Jayesh around the waist.

"No," Riven said, dragging him backward with inexorable strength. "You shall remain with me."

* * *

The day before, Phoenix had faced Limerick. "I wish that ..."

* * *

 


	15. Bones

Uldren and the Corsairs leaped through the portal and landed on the cool grass outside the Dasa compound. It was late afternoon, the sunlight stretching in golden bands across the lawn.

"We made it!" Elledia cried. She and Wren hugged each other and burst into tearful laughter. Ruith stood nearby, panting and smiling. She was shaking all over, and after a moment, sank down to sit on the grass.

Uldren looked around. "Jayesh?" Then he spun, urgently searching. "Jayesh? Where is he?"

They all looked around wildly, but there was no sign of him.

"He must have tripped or something," Ruith exclaimed. She started to struggle to her feet, but Uldren held up a hand. "No, stay. I'll go back inside." He stepped back through the smoky black portal, back into darkness, back onto the narrow rail.

"Jayesh!" he called. The rail was empty. The Ascendant Realm was silent, no sound from the missing Guardian or Riven.

"I'm not picking him up anywhere," Pulled Pork whispered.

"Riven!" Uldren yelled into the silence. "Come face me!"

No answer.

"She got him," Uldren muttered. He raked his fingers through the long hair on top of his head and turned in a circle, thinking. He remembered moving about the Ascendant Realm, but he'd only ever done it while Ascendant, himself.

He hurried back and jumped through the portal, landing on the sunlit grass. He ran to the compound's front door, dashed inside, and asked the first Guardian he saw, "Do they have any tincture of Queensfoil here?"

The female Titan said, "Yes, of course. It's in the cooler back in the kitchen."

Uldren nodded and dashed away. Behind him, the Titan stared, her lips forming the word, "Who--"

"She recognized you," Pork said.

"Don't care," Uldren said, threading his way through the compound to the kitchens in the back. As he passed other Guardians, they glanced at his face, then did a double take.

He burst into the kitchen, which was a vast, industrial affair with stainless steel appliances and a spotless marble floor. Several Awoken looked up from their duties, surprised.

"I need Queensfoil," barked Uldren. "Friend's lost in the Ascendant Realm."

One woman rushed to a small cooler in the corner, opened it, and lifted a small bottle from among a row of identical bottles. "Here you are, sir. But it's expensive."

"I know." Uldren opened the bottle and downed the contents, the familiar taste making him shudder. "Dasa can bill me."

The kitchen staff stared at him, taking in his royal armor and especially his face. Questions were forming that he didn't have time to answer. Uldren ducked out the back door and sprinted along the back of the compound. It was a longer trip, but he'd likely be delayed indoors. Jayesh was out there, probably being torn to pieces very slowly, and Uldren had to take time to navigate.

Panting hard, he arrived back at the front of the compound, where the three Corsairs still waited near the portal. Ruith beckoned. "It's getting ready to close! Hurry!"

Uldren jumped through as the portal made a whooshing sound. He arrived in the misty darkness of the Ascendant Realm just as the portal collapsed on itself and sealed shut. He would not be leaving that way.

Uldren's noisy breathing was the only sound in the silence. The Queensfoil amplified his senses. As he regained his breath, he was able to focus on what they were telling him.

As one of the original Awoken who had been created in the clash of Light and Darkness, Uldren had a particular sensitivity to higher dimensions and realms. He was not limited to five senses, or even six. When he extended these other senses with Queensfoil, they detected Light and Darkness the way a ghost did.

He felt the trails that each of his companions had made as they had run up the rail to the portal. He found his own trail, running to the portal, then back again. He backtracked along the rail, picking through the overlapping trails for Jayesh's.

It was a bright blue trail, pure Light, which was no surprise. Uldren followed it and found that it veered off the rail a short distance from the portal. It went left and down. There it mingled with a much larger trail--a sort of greenish purple trail that tasted of Riven. Uldren knelt and peered into the murk. "Pork, light?"

His ghost shone his headlight down into the void. It illuminated a couple of floating chunks of wall, appearing where he needed stepping stones. Uldren jumped down and followed the mixed Light and Darkness trail.

It plunged down for what seemed like miles. Uldren hunted for a path, which appeared as he looked. The Ascendant Realm did that, constantly remaking itself according to the desires of those within it.

Why had Riven taken Jayesh? He was the antithesis of her, a Guardian who constantly tried to do the right thing. Uldren worried about this as he jumped and balanced, his ghost lighting his way. Had Jayesh foolishly made a wish? But Riven would have granted it, not carried him off. Why didn't he fight her? Or was this a trap for Uldren, himself? That was more likely. Well, she didn't know he couldn't use his Light. And he had his trusty auto rifle slung against his back. It didn't matter if she was dead--he'd kill her deader.

Uldren jumped off the last rock and landed on bones.

A huge pile of bones had appeared out of nothing. They were jumbled and mixed, far too many to belong to only Riven, and all of giant size. Riven was there, camouflaged, her skull bent over a tiny figure. It lay still.

Uldren ran toward them, but the bone field seemed to stretch forever ahead of him, Riven and her prisoner always the same distance away.

"Let him go!" Uldren bellowed.

Riven looked up, the skull jerking around with mechanical speed. As she moved, Uldren caught sight of the chimera. The monster floated over the fallen Guardian, coiling its tentacles around his head and shoulders, probing. Jayesh lay on his back, unresisting, as if dead.

"Hello, O brother mine," Riven said in Mara Sov's voice.

It was the voice that had scraped the inside of his mind. Uldren flinched, grabbing his temples. Fresh pain stabbed through his brain.

"So, you do remember," Riven cooed. "My, how close we were. I had your will firmly in my claws. But sometimes you resisted. A paltry resistance, true. The fact that you were able to resist at all impressed me. In the end, you did all that I asked."

Uldren couldn't answer. The inside of his mind was bleeding. His ghost tried to heal the damage, but every word the dragoness spoke opened each wound afresh.

"Courage," she whispered. "Devotion. Sacrifice. Death. Such beautiful qualities in your species. You had them, and they killed you for it. Even as a Guardian, it cannot be stripped from you. Look at you--intent on rescuing your friend. And he is your friend--I see it in both your minds. It must be nice to have a friend, O prince mine."

"Shut up!" Uldren screamed, holding his head.

Riven paid no attention. "Look at this Guardian. He has no ghost. Can you believe it?"

"He has a ghost," Uldren said, squinting through a growing headache. He moved forward. One step. Then another.

"He left his ghost behind," Riven crowed. "Because his ghost was afraid. What Guardian cares so much for a piece of glass and metal? And yet he does. Mm, so much love in this tiny heart. I could feast on his desire for years. I'll feed him dreams ... remind him of those he's lost ..."

"He left his ghost?" Uldren whispered to Pulled Pork.

"I'm not detecting Phoenix anywhere," Pork whispered back. "Oh my, how did he think he'd make it with no ghost?"

"He almost did," Uldren muttered. "Until _she_ noticed."

"Devotion," Riven crooned. "Love. Such rare qualities in a Guardian. He is mine, as you once were, O Prince. And don't think you can steal him from me. Your pathetic potion gives you no real power."

Uldren fired his rifle at the skull. It ducked behind a huge vertebrae.

Riven laughed. "So arrogant! Being a Guardian has taught you to solve all problems with weapons. Use your Light, if you dare."

Uldren reached inside himself for Light--any power at all. His head hurt so badly, he could barely focus. But Jayesh lay there, still alive, despite whatever Riven's monster was doing to him. Uldren had to intervene, had to save him, had to--

 

* * *

 

"I wish ... I wish that he had a friend ..."

 

* * *

 

 

Uldren had tried to save his sister, too.

The memory filtered in through the headache. He'd believed her trapped, and had obeyed so many strange commands from that same voice. And it had all been lies.

"Guardian," his ghost whispered. "You tried to do the right thing, as you knew it. But you were injured, even then. This choice is much clearer. Your friend is dying. There he is. We must save him."

"I can't," Uldren whispered back. "I can't find my Light. And last time I tried to save someone--I failed so badly."

"I'm with you, now," the ghost said, his blue eye earnest. "I can help you. All you have to do is think about fire."

Fire--dancing gold on a hearth or campfire. Fire--blazing red as it consumed a forest. Fire--for light, heat, comfort, and so dangerous.

Fire raced down Uldren's right arm and formed a golden gun in his hand. He aimed it at the chimera with its tentacles wound around Jayesh's head.

The first bullet punched straight through the monster. It screamed and flipped backward, releasing the human figure on the ground.

The second bullet smashed through the skull of Riven. So did the third bullet. Fire erupted across the skull, burning Light unquenchable.

Riven screamed and whipped away into the darkness. Her scream went on and on, farther and farther away, until the last whisper of sound had fallen silent.

The bones faded away. In their place was a piece of a marble floor with broken pillars along one side. Jayesh lay on this floor, unmoving.

Uldren dashed to him and knelt, checking for a pulse. Jayesh's heart still beat, but slowly. His face was bruised purple from the chimera's grasp, and his eyes were cruelly slashed. No blue Light gleamed from them any more. Blood gathered in the corners and covered his cheeks.

"I'm so sorry," Uldren whispered, clasping Jayesh's cold hands. "I shouldn't have let her talk so long. Please don't be dead. I can't carry you out of here."

Jayesh's head rolled to one side and his damaged eyelids fluttered. "What ... happened?" he managed to say. One hand groped feebly at the air, finally locating Uldren's arm. "Uldren? My eyes burn. I can't see."

"She blinded you," Uldren said. "I'm sorry."

"Nothing my ghost can't fix," Jayesh said, trying to sound cheerful. He struggled to sit up. Every movement was jerky, as if he'd lost the ability to control his own body. "I had the worst nightmares. All about bones. Where are we?"

"The Ascendant Realm," Uldren replied. "I've chased Riven off, but she'll come back eventually."

Jayesh sat there, touching the sore marks on his face. His hand shook badly, the back of it bruised, too. He hesitantly touched his damaged eyes and the blood, sucking in his breath through his teeth. "I'm disfigured, aren't I?"

"You weren't that pretty to begin with," Uldren said. He took the corner of his cloak and wiped the worst of the blood off Jayesh's face, despite the oozing wounds.

Jayesh hugged himself and rocked back and forth for a moment. "Did you say there was a chimera?"

"Yeah. It had grabbed your head in the tentacles."

Jayesh shuddered and wrapped his arms around his head, belatedly shielding himself. "Riven saw that I left my ghost behind."

"Which was stupid," Uldren snapped. "Why did you do that?"

"He was scared," Jayesh said. "If only he was here, now." A simple admission, but it pained Uldren. With no ghost, Jayesh would be blind until they could return to reality. And then they'd have to find his ghost, wherever Jayesh had left it.

"Pork, can you ..."

Pulled Pork flew forward and played his healing beam up and down Jayesh's face. "The chimera hurt you badly. I can stop the bleeding, I think. But I don't know you well enough to mend your eyes. I'm sorry."

"Do it," Jayesh said, turning his face toward the warmth of the ghost's beam.

Pork mended the worst of the cuts, halting the bleeding and some of the pain. Jayesh prodded his eyelids with his fingertips. For a moment his mouth quivered, holding back the weakness of tears. He forced a smile, instead. "I'll live, I think." After a moment, he added unsteadily, "Do we have to jump rocks and such to get out?"

Uldren sat beside him and shook his head. "The portal closed. I don't know where another exit is, at this point."

"So we're trapped." Jayesh rubbed one eye, then the other. "And she blinded me. Why do they always go for the eyes?"

"Because of your Light," Uldren said. "It shines blue. Not anymore, though."

"Not anymore," Jayesh repeated. He hugged his knees, his sightless eyes staring into space. "She took my Dawnblade, too. I tried to fight her when she grabbed me. I summoned all my Light and attacked her. She grabbed my blade in her teeth and just ... just tore it away. Out of me. The Light, the sword, all of it. It was like having my insides ripped out. I collapsed, then. Riven laughed. That's when she slashed up my face. I couldn't stop her--she was so strong, and my strength was gone. She told me ..." His voice wavered. "...that I was made from nothing, for nothing, and my end would be nothing."

"She's a liar," Uldren said with a flash of fury. "You'll get your Light back, and your sword, too. If I can, you can. You can't give up, understand?"

Jayesh turned toward him, trying to see. "I keep trying to argue with her, in my head. But with no Light, I just fold up and collapse. And this." He touched the deep cuts around his eyes. "All I see is darkness. She robbed me of all Light--even daylight."

Uldren sat there, hurting for his friend, and smoldering with anger at the Ahamkara. "Someday, Jayesh, I will grind her bones to dust, one by one. She'll answer for everything she's done."

Jayesh smiled weakly. "I hope so. Light, how are we going to get out of here?"

"I don't know. Start walking, I suppose."

They sat in silence for a few minutes. Then Jayesh murmured, "I just want to go home."

 

 


	16. Sightless

"I wish that he had a friend ... who will lead him to the place he misses most."

* * *

At that moment, they heard the most improbable sound in the world.

"Meow!"

Uldren turned. Out of the gloom walked an orange tabby cat with glowing purple eyes, its tail in the air, as if greeting friends. It went straight to Jayesh and rubbed against his leg.

"Is this a cat?" Jayesh said, touching the furry back.

"It's one of the Ascendant cats," Uldren said, flinching away from it. "They have manifestations in the Dreaming City where they watch us. They're scary powerful."

"Hi, weird Awoken kitty," Jayesh said, petting the cat by touch, his arm trembling with weakness. "I knew you had to be alive, somewhere."

It purred, the noise loud in the stillness.

Another cat appeared out of the darkness - a black one. Then a silver tabby. Then one that was pure white. Soon nine cats surrounded them, purring, meowing, sniffing them, rubbing themselves against Jayesh and Uldren. All had the same glowing purple eyes. Uldren sat perfectly still. If any of these creatures took offense, it could kill them in a matter of seconds.

But Jayesh didn't know this, and had no fear. He'd just come through something so horrible, a few cats were nothing.

"Do you kitties know the way out?" Jayesh asked them. "I need to go home."

The cats all meowed at the same time, as if answering. Then they bounded off into the darkness, one by one.

Uldren jumped to his feet and helped Jayesh up. "Look, they opened a path. They're going to help us, for some reason. What did you do to make them like you?"

"I visited a statue a few times," Jayesh said. "And petted it. That's all."

He had interacted with a manifestation to the point where the Ascendant cats considered him theirs? Insane. Jayesh had no idea what he'd done. He might as well have befriended nine small self-guided missiles. Uldren had seen them destroy Taken as casually as a mortal cat dispatched a mouse.

Jayesh stood unsteadily, clutching Uldren's arm. "You'd better lead."

Uldren did, guiding his injured companion down a wide crystal pavement that the cats had opened. The cats darted ahead and ran back to check on them, graceful, flowing shapes in the dark.

After a while, the pavement ended. There was a short drop onto another strip of pavement.

Jayesh halted, gasping. "I can't jump. I can't see!"

"It's three feet down," Uldren said. He jumped down, himself, then tugged Jayesh's hand. "Come on. I'm right here."

Jayesh crouched, straining to make his damaged eyes see something - anything. He slid one leg over the edge, then the other, then hopped down, clinging to Uldren for guidance.

"See? No big deal," Uldren said. "Come on, the cats went this way." He spoke confidently, but inside, he was worried and angry - angry at what Jayesh had suffered, and worried about whether they could make it out.

Jayesh walked alongside him, sweating with anxiety. "This is worse than Riven grabbing me. I have to decide to leap into the void, myself."

"Why did she grab you, anyway?" Uldren asked. "Just because you had no ghost?"

"Because she said she sensed my love," Jayesh replied, wincing. "Pretty dumb, I know."

"It's not dumb," Uldren assured him. "Ahamkara catch you where you're weakest."

Jayesh nodded. After a moment, he added, "She was poking into my memories of my wife and son. I was fighting her."

"You were laying on the ground like you were dead."

"Inside my head," Jayesh clarified. "She wanted me to wish for them. I learned my lesson, though. No wishes."

They came to a gap in the floor, barely two feet wide. The cats jumped over it. But Jayesh cowered at the edge. "I could fall through. Light, what if I fall?"

"I've got you," Uldren said, stepping over and gripping his hands. "Take a long step forward."

Jayesh drew several deep, panicked breaths. Then he stepped over the gap, one foot at a time.

"I'm glad you came back for me," Jayesh panted as they walked on. "If Riven hadn't killed me, trying to walk out would have."

"No problem," Uldren replied. "Riven ripped up the inside of my head. I've still got a headache."

"It's probably left over from before you died," Jayesh said. "She was in your head then, too."

"So she said," Uldren muttered. "I was trying to save my sister."

"I know," Jayesh said softly. "You said as much, there at the end. I couldn't ... couldn't condemn you. I've done stupid things out of love, too." He told Uldren a story about avoiding Kari for three weeks after they'd managed to hurt each other's feelings. "I wouldn't even let her make up. I'm such a proud idiot."

"This is supposed to make me feel better?" Uldren said, but he laughed.

The cats led them to a place where floating boulders formed a steep path upward, like giant stairs.

Uldren described it to Jayesh, who panicked again. "I can't see where to jump. And I don't have any Light. I used it all trying to fight Riven. No long jumps. Oh Light, how can I do this?"

"One jump at a time," Uldren said. "First one is four feet away. Come on, let's just do it."

They jumped together and landed on the first rock. As it began to revolve under their weight, Uldren hurried Jayesh forward and helped him jump to the next one.

Jayesh had never been so terrified in his whole life. Being eaten by a chimera had been the single worst thing that had happened to him - until this. Blind, jumping in the dark, never knowing if he was about to miss his footing and fall headlong into infinity. His entire being focused on Uldren's voice and the guiding tug of his hands, telling him how far to jump, and in what direction. He wanted Phoenix, he wanted Kari, he wanted to curl up somewhere with four walls and cry. And he wanted Light again. He wanted to see it and feel it, wanted to use it and feel the sweet warmth flowing through him. All he had now was cold and darkness, piercing loneliness, constantly reaching for Phoenix's friendly presence and finding him gone. Even with Riven crushing him flat, stabbing his mind with her words, he had reached constantly for his missing ghost. Would Phoenix stay behind, as he had promised? Or would he be overcome by the desire to follow, losing himself in the Ascendant Realm forever?

And his eyes - a constant burning ache through his entire head. Trying to see through the darkness, having to feel his way, instead. What if Phoenix was gone and he was blind forever? Could he live without another glimpse of light?

Halfway up the floating blocks, Jayesh was shaking so badly that Uldren let him sit and rest.

"Almost there," Uldren assured him. "I think there's a portal up there. Light's coming through from somewhere."

"I can't see it," Jayesh said, looking up. "Light, I hate this. It's so dark. You don't realize how much you use your vision until it's gone." Superficial words for the all-encompassing terror and sense of being lost.

"You're doing great," Uldren assured him. "Almost there."

They weren't almost there, but the words sounded good.

Jayesh rallied and climbed to his feet again. "Let's do this."

They walked and jumped and scrambled upward, following the cats, who jumped easily from stone to stone, up and down, meowing encouragingly.

"It's an exit portal," Uldren said, peering up at it. "I have no idea where it goes. With luck, it's not straight into the Hellmouth."

"Traveler have mercy," Jayesh panted. "I can't see to shoot anything. The Hive would eat me alive."

"I'll check, first," Uldren started to say, when something roared in the distance. A shrieking, angry roar.

"Riven," Jayesh whispered. "She's hunting us."

All nine cats arched their backs and hissed, facing the same direction.

"I summoned a golden gun and messed her up," Uldren explained as they crossed to another rock.

"You - a golden gun?" Jayesh panted. "You used your Light?"

"I did," Uldren said proudly. "And I'll use it on her again, too, for what she's done to us."

The haze billowed past them in great waves, as if some unimaginably huge being was shoving its way through the darkness toward them. Uldren saw it and Jayesh felt it.

"Faster," Uldren whispered.

Jayesh moved faster, tripping on rough places in the stone. "How much further?"

"About three more-"

Another wave of atmosphere rolled by them. The cats took cover in crevices among the boulders, eyes shining in the shadows.

As they crossed to another rock and scrambled up its angled surface, Jayesh panted, "Whatever's coming - it's bigger than Riven. It feels different."

Uldren took a second to use his extended senses. The entire dimension was rippling like the waves on a pond when a large object moved through it. If it was only Riven, she had grown to giant size. But the force of the waves spoke of not one being, but many.

"She's bringing the Ascendant Hive," Uldren whispered. "We need to get out of here, now!"

They sprang to another boulder and Jayesh stumbled. One foot slid off into space. He clung to Uldren, whispering, "Oh Light, oh Light!"

"I've got you," Uldren panted, hauling him to safety. He happened to look past Jayesh, back the way they had come, and froze.

Advancing out of the murk came a thousand glowing green eyes. At their head was Riven, now an Ahamkara skeleton draped in rotting flesh, her skull streaked with black burned spots. On her back rode a Hive queen, wrapped in floating gossamer robes, surrounded by an aura of green soul fire.

"What is it?" Jayesh exclaimed, hearing Uldren's breathing catch.

"It can't be Savathun," Uldren whispered. He guided Jayesh toward the final rock between them and freedom. Quickly. "She works in secret. This must be the other one. The war goddess."

"Xivu Arath?"

"Yeah, that one. She's riding on Riven with an army of Hive."

Jayesh gasped a little and swiped at his eyes, as if trying to clear them. "Where's the portal?"

"One more jump."

"Go!"

They leaped together. As they landed, Uldren's ankle turned and he fell. He slid down the rock toward the abyss, dragging Jayesh with him.

Jayesh cried out and managed to brace one boot against a ridge of rock. It halted their slide, but not for long. Uldren hung from Jayesh's wrists, trying to find purchase with his legs. This rock had the bad luck to be half-crystal pavement. He slid off it again and again.

"Guardian, use your Light!" his ghost cried. "Think of knives made of fire. Stab them into the rock."

"And hurry," Jayesh panted.

Uldren reached through the sore, shredded places in his mind and looked for fire. He let go of Jayesh with one hand and summoned a handful of red-hot knives made of Light. He slammed them into the rock to make a ladder, then scrambled up them.

They were ten feet from the portal. As Uldren glanced at their oncoming enemies, the portal made a whooshing sound, preparing to close.

"No!" He grabbed Jayesh and poured all his energy into one last, frenzied sprint. As the first Hive Knights leaped onto the rocks, Uldren and Jayesh dove through the portal. It closed behind them.

Beyond the portal was a wall. Uldren and Jayesh crashed into it and fell to the floor in a heap, where they lay panting. Concrete walls and floor. Lights in plain fixtures. Quiet. Doors every ten feet.

"Where are we?" Jayesh whispered.

"Some building," Uldren murmured, sitting up. "The Dasa compound, I hope."

Jayesh pulled himself up and sat against the wall. "Can the Hive follow us?"

"They'd better not." Still panting, Uldren watched the spot where they had come through, in case the portal reopened. Minutes passed. Nothing happened.

The two guardians slowly relaxed and drooped. The quiet and stillness was balm to their nerves after the frantic final dash. Uldren had time to think about the insane rescue he had just pulled off. He was both proud of himself and a little sick at how close they'd both come to annihilation.

Jayesh massaged his eyelids. "Did Wren and Elledia make it?"

"Yes," Uldren said. "We landed on the lawn outside the Dasa compound. They're clear of the time loop."

"Thank the Traveler," Jayesh whispered. He leaned against the wall and closed his eyes. Here, in the stronger light, Uldren saw the cruel claw marks across his face that had claimed his sight. Riven had been indiscriminate in her desecration. She must have hated that spark of Light in his eyes.

"I need my ghost," Jayesh muttered. "I wonder if we could get a ride back to the Dreaming City."

"Where'd you leave him?"

"Hiding in the Blind Well." Jayesh turned his head, listening. "Someone's coming."

Uldren leaped to his feet, clutching his rifle by instinct. The whole compound must know of his presence by now. If it came to a fight, he'd make sure to win.

A woman emerged from a stairwell and walked toward them, reading a tablet - an attractive human warlock with short auburn hair combed across her face. She didn't notice them until she had to halt to step around Jayesh, sitting in the hallway. "Excuse me, I was only-"

She looked at Uldren. Then she looked at Jayesh. Her tablet hit the floor with a clatter. " _Jayesh!_ "

He turned his mangled face toward her, his expression brightening in recognition. "Kari?"

Instantly a sidearm appeared in her hands. She stood over Jayesh and pointed her gun in Uldren's face. "I don't know what you've done to him, but you'd better talk fast."

Uldren backed away a step, not sure whether to aim his rifle at her or use it as a shield. "Should I know you? Because you know him-"

"Kari!" Jayesh exclaimed, climbing to his feet. He felt for her and tugged at her arm. "Light, Kari, put that down. He's just rescued me."

"You can't see it," Kari snapped, "but this is Uldren Sov. Or something that looks like him. What are you? An Ahamkara? Some kind of illusion? I swear I will blow your brains out if you so much as breathe."

"He's a Guardian," Jayesh said. "Please, Kari, put the gun down. I told you in my last letter, remember?"

Kari looked at Jayesh's ruined eyes, then at Uldren. Slowly she lowered her gun, biting her lower lip. Tears glistened in her eyes. "Show your ghost."

Uldren held out a hand and summoned Pulled Pork.

Kari stared at the ghost, then at Jayesh. "He's a Guardian," she repeated, holstering her weapon. "I didn't understand that letter. You just said you were training someone ..."

Jayesh gestured. "Kari, meet Uldren Sov. Uldren, meet Kari, my wife."

Kari threw her arms around Jayesh and hugged him, laughing a little. He hugged her back, tightly, burying his face in her neck. They held each other a moment. Then she pulled back and examined his face, tears pouring down her cheeks. "What happened to you?"

"Riven got me," Jayesh said, raising a hand to touch her face. "Don't cry, lovelight."

"Why didn't Phoenix heal you?"

"He's not with me."

Kari pressed a hand to her mouth and looked at Uldren. "His ghost is dead?"

"No, he's in the Dreaming City," Uldren replied. "We just need to go pick him up."

"Kari," Jayesh said, "what are you doing in Reefedge?"

"Reefedge?" Kari said, wiping her tears. "This is the Tower."

"The Tower?" Uldren and Jayesh repeated in disbelief.

"On Earth?" Jayesh added.

"Yes," Kari said. "You didn't know?"

"We came through the Ascendant Realm," Uldren said. "Those cats ... Jayesh, those cats took you straight home, didn't they?"

"They did," Jayesh said with a painful grin. "Can we go indoors? Uldren shouldn't be here. They'll kill him."

Kari led them down the hall and opened one of the doors. Inside was a comfortable little apartment. After the grandeur of the Reef, it was small and simple, but it somehow matched Jayesh. They helped him to the sofa, where Jayesh folded into it with a sigh. "Where's Connor?"

"Babysitter. I had to do some Archive work today." Kari stroked Jayesh's face and hair, then kissed his temple gently. "Can I get you anything? Water?"

"Water," Jayesh and Uldren said at once.

Kari retrieved two tall glasses for them, and returned accompanied by her ghost, who hid behind her and peeked at Uldren.

"Now," she said, sitting down and folding her hands on her knees. "Tell me everything, and I mean every last detail."

Jayesh and Uldren took turns telling her about their crazy experiences in the Dreaming City. But Uldren had to finish the story, because Jayesh nodded off and slept, worn out from terror and pain.

This was how Uldren found that they'd been in the Ascendant Realm for fourteen days.

"Two weeks," Uldren muttered, looking at Jayesh's slumped figure. "Time does pass differently in there. Do you think his ghost waited?"

"Light, I hope so." Kari looked at her ghost. "Neko, contact Phoenix."

"I've been trying," Neko said quietly. "There's no response."

They sat there a moment, pondering the implications of this.

"Jayesh left him in the Blind Well," Uldren said. "There's a lot of interference there ..."

Kari bit her lips. "We've got to get Jayesh back out there."

At the sound of his name, Jayesh snapped awake. He startled and leaped to his feet, staring around, his sightless eyes gone dark. "My Dawnblade! Traveler, please!"

Kari and Uldren jumped up, each one grabbing a hand.

"It's okay," Uldren said.

At the same time, Kari said, "You're home, Jay. You're safe."

He stood there, gripping their hands, gasping for breath, trying to master the fear that had swept him. Slowly he sat down again, bowing his head, still clinging to them. "Sorry," he whispered. "Sorry. I need Phoenix."

Kari shot Uldren a fierce look. "We're going to get his ghost back. Right now."


	17. Phoenix

Kari's ship was a cruiser type, with space for crew and tiny living quarters. Jayesh huddled in the crew seats behind the cockpit and listened to Kari and Uldren talk as they flew.

Hearing Kari's voice, without being able to see her, had been comforting and distressing at the same time. Even now, surrounded by the rumble of the ship's NLS drive, he still strained his ears for her voice. She was curious about Uldren and asking him questions about long-ago things that he actually remembered.

Jayesh missed Phoenix's voice, too - the cheerful little voice that had resurrected him, who shared jokes with him and debated him on any topic Jayesh developed an interest in. Poor Phoenix, still hurt and hiding it. Surely he had waited. Surely he hadn't set out into the Ascendant Realm alone. But it had been two weeks. Jayesh knew his ghost. If Phoenix lost all hope, and he would, then he would think he had nothing more to lose.

"Wait for me, Phoenix," he whispered. "Please wait. Just a few more hours."

In the back of his mind, where he was most honest with himself, a tiny voice asked, "Do you want Phoenix because he's your friend? Or because he can heal you?"

Jayesh touched the bandages taped over his damaged face, forehead to nose. Everything hurt, despite the painkillers circulating through his blood. All he could think of was the sensation of the healing beam, the warmth, the relief from pain. But was that all Phoenix was to him? Just quick healing?

"Why do I have to choose?" he thought miserably. "I miss him for both. The healing. And his snark. He wouldn't let me sit and worry about this. He'd make a wisecrack and put me in my place."

He leaned against the headrest and sighed. He still felt empty, his Dawnblade gone. No Light, no healing rift, no fire. Without his ghost, he couldn't even sense void or arc Light. And worst of all, no contact with the Traveler. Jayesh was alone in outer darkness.

"Phoenix," he whispered. "Please wait for me."

Neko, Kari's ghost, appeared nearby with a small burst of air. "Hello, Jayesh," he said softly.

"Hi, Neko," Jayesh replied. Kari's ghost was the jealous type and usually barely tolerated Jayesh. But Neko had also never seen something like this happen before. He swept Jayesh with a healing beam that did little.

"I'm sorry," Neko whispered.

Jayesh shook his head. "It's not your fault."

"You're suffering," Neko said. "Just like Kari did, when I ... couldn't heal her. And I can't heal you, either."

"In a few more hours, I'll be fine," Jayesh told him. "Phoenix will fix me up."

Neko didn't speak for a while. Jayesh heard the tiny mechanical whispers as the ghost's segments rotated back and forth. Then Neko said, "I can't reach him, Jay. I've been pinging his signature constantly since you arrived home. He's not answering."

Jayesh sat very still. "You don't think he left ... do you?"

"I don't know," Neko said. "But I'm scared. For both of you." Again, he tried to heal Jayesh, and couldn't.

Jayesh tried to push back his rising fear. Why didn't Phoenix answer? Surely the Blind Well wasn't active at all times. A signal should get through eventually. Had Phoenix crossed through the portal alone?

Suddenly he felt the hard, bony grip around his middle again, the sense of being carried swiftly through darkness. Again, he looked up at the Ahamkara skull with its tusks and glittering teeth.

"What delicious love you have," Riven said. "But I don't like your eyes. Bah, so much Light. This won't do." The claws had flashed at his face. Red-hot pain. She'd held him down and inflicted stroke after stroke, even as he struggled and screamed. Was he still there? He couldn't see. What was holding him down? The flight harness? Or the burning tentacles of a chimera? He could smell it - its foul breath fanned his face, the tentacles poking through his brain-

"Jayesh!" A friendly voice. Hands grabbing his own. "Jayesh, this is the ship. It's me, Uldren. You're safe!"

Jayesh gasped for breath and clung to those hands and that voice. "Uldren?" Again the rumble of the ship's engines returned. He was sitting in a seat. Jayesh gasped for breath as cold sweat poured down his back. His face still hurt horribly. And his eyes-

The chair beside his creaked. "I'm right here," Uldren said. "It's all right."

Now Jayesh was shaking, shaking so hard he couldn't stop. A part of him was humiliated that Uldren had to see this. Why couldn't Kari have come, instead? But she was driving. He gripped his armrests and clenched his teeth.

When the shaking subsided enough for him to speak, he said, "I wish I could forget. Like you."

Uldren laughed uncomfortably. "It's not always a good thing. Look, we'll find your ghost and you'll be fine."

"But Neko can't reach him."

Uldren turned away and muttered to his own ghost. Jayesh was alone again, lost in the dark, and there were bones and monsters. No Light. No Phoenix. He would have cried, but it sent needles of pain through his ruined eyes.

He started to drift back into the horrors again, but Uldren again took his hands. "Stay with me, Jayesh. You're safe."

"Phoenix," Jayesh whispered. "You can't reach him either, can you?"

Uldren hesitated. "No. But Pork says there's a lot of Blind Well interference."

Phoenix must be gone. Jayesh slumped in his seat. This time, Uldren kept ahold of his hands, trying to keep Jayesh grounded in reality.

"Did I tell you about the time I fought a Fallen Vandal to a standstill with only a knife?"

Uldren launched into the story. Jayesh focused on his voice, trying to stay afloat, above the pain and darkness.

By the time they arrived in the Dreaming City, Jayesh was frantic with pain and dread, despite Uldren's help. He clung to Kari as she rode her sparrow to the Blind Well, guided by Uldren, who borrowed Jayesh's.

"Phoenix!" Jayesh called inside his head. But there was no sense of his ghost's spark.

The sparrow drew to a halt. Kari helped him dismount. "Phoenix!" Jayesh cried.

No answer.

"This way," Kari said, guiding his stumbling feet onto hard pavement. Jayesh broke away from her and ran through the doors, groping his way along one wall. "Phoenix!" he screamed. "Oh Traveler, don't let him have left. _Phoenix_!"

* * *

When his Guardian vanished through the portal, Phoenix instantly regretted leaving him. The silence and separation were worse than anything in the Ascendant Realm.

He hid behind a statue and waited, watching the portal. The Queensfoil tincture lasted four hours. Hopefully they'd reach Reefedge by then and Pulled Pork would notify him.

Minutes ticked by. Then hours. Four, five, six hours.

Phoenix tried to send a message to Pulled Pork, but the Blind Well was active, and his signal was absorbed by the interdimensional murk. He waited until it cleared, then flew outside to try again.

Still no answer from Uldren's ghost. So Phoenix tried Banner.

"Yes, they arrived," Banner told him.

Phoenix was relieved.

Then Banner dropped the bombshell. "Well, everyone but your Guardian. He didn't make it out, so the prince went back to find him. That was two hours ago. The portal closed. No telling where they'll come out."

Stricken, Phoenix floated there, his entire core turning to ice. Jayesh was lost in the Ascendant Realm. Being hurt or killed. With no ghost.

Slowly he turned and flew back into the Blind Well. He returned to watching the crystal ring with its flickers of lightning. Maybe it would open again and Jayesh and Uldren would come back. But if it didn't ...

Phoenix examined his options. He could give Jayesh up for dead and set out into the world to find a new Guardian. The very idea was repugnant.

Or he could wait two weeks for the portal to open, then enter the Ascendant Realm himself, alone.

Jayesh had made him promise not to. But he hadn't expected to lose himself out there. Maybe Phoenix could collect a rescue party. He wouldn't be alone, then.

As he thought about daring the Ascendant Realm by himself, the old paralyzing fear came creeping back. A ghost braving that netherworld, where everything would see his Light? He might as well use himself as bait for the monsters.

But Jayesh needed him. He'd abandoned his Guardian, and now Jayesh was probably dead out there.

Phoenix flew in circles. He wanted to weep. _Your Guardian didn't make it out ..._ What had happened? Had Jayesh missed his footing and fallen into the void? Had something attacked him, quenching his Light? He had no healing and no Light to recharge a super. Jayesh was already so frightened, and Phoenix had let him go alone.

"I'm the selfish one," he whispered, bashing himself into a pillar. "Jay was trying to become less selfish, and I couldn't see that I'm half the problem. Oh Jay, forgive me ... I hope you live to forgive me ..."

The day faded into night. Phoenix waited.

The sun rose on the second day. Phoenix went outside and called Pulled Pork. When he couldn't reach him, he called Banner.

"Nothing," the other ghost said gloomily. "My Guardian is very upset. But what can we do? All we know is that the prince came inside, took Queensfoil, and left again. We haven't seen them since."

Uldren might have a chance of finding Jayesh if he used Queensfoil. Phoenix had heard the stories of its effects on Awoken. But if Uldren thought it was necessary, then Jayesh was lost - and probably in huge danger.

The day passed, along with the following night. The third day dawned. No signal from Uldren's ghost. Banner had nothing to report.

Phoenix's spirits sank. Uldren might be dead, too. The Ascendant Realm had claimed Guardians before.

By the fourth day, Phoenix was slowly becoming certain that his Guardian wasn't coming back. He flew around and around the portal room, mourning in silence. Jayesh - his wonderful Guardian, whom he adored - was gone. Phoenix thought his core might split from the anguish. No wonder bereaved ghosts simply returned to the Traveler. Hunting a second Guardian was too awful to contemplate. More centuries alone, but with memories of their Guardian, looking for a new spark, but suspecting they were really only looking for the one they'd lost.

The following week, the portal would open. And Phoenix would go through. He'd spend eternity hunting his Guardian in the Ascendant Realm, and his own fear was the penalty he must pay. His fear had cost him his dearest friend, his other half. And if something struck him down, maybe his spark would reunite with Jayesh's somewhere on the other side.

* * *

By the end of two weeks, Phoenix no longer paced. He landed on a statue and watched the portal, unblinking. The Blind Well was nearly at peak charge. When that happened, he must go through. He'd probably never see the light again, but he had to find Jayesh or die trying. Most likely, he'd die trying.

The day wore on, and Phoenix waited. He thought about the wish he'd given Limerick. A lot of good that had been. It had probably been twisted into killing Jayesh, instead. He'd thought himself so clever with the wording, too. Every choice he had made had been wrong. The cost had been too high. It didn't matter if he still felt the chimera's tooth sometimes, it didn't matter that every second in the Ascendant Realm was going to be living pain. Jayesh was worth it all.

The portal flickered and filled with mist. Any minute now and it would open. Phoenix steeled himself, trying to beat back his fear. Jayesh was in there. That was all that mattered. The Blind Well fell quiet. One more charge ...

"Phoenix!" someone yelled in the distance.

Phoenix didn't stir. Nothing must distract him from his suicidal dash into the Ascendant Realm.

"Phoenix!" came the cry again - almost a scream. Had that been Jayesh? But ... how was that possible? Jayesh was dead in the other dimension.

He felt for his Guardian's spark, almost afraid to venture the hope to do that much. A distant flicker of warmth touched his core. Jayesh was alive! Calling him! And oh - he was in pain. Such huge pain. The ghost's entire being flared with joy and sorrow.

" _Phoenix_!" Jayesh screamed downstairs, his voice echoing. He sounded distraught, desperate. It cut Phoenix like a whip - Jayesh had never screamed for him like that before.

Phoenix shot downstairs at top speed, homing in on his Guardian's beloved spark. He couldn't travel as fast as he wanted - light speed was not fast enough to reunite him with his Guardian.

Jayesh stumbled through the doorway of the Blind Well and stood with his arms out, trying to balance. "Phoenix," he said, his voice hoarse, as if he'd been calling his ghost for some time. "Where are you?"

"Jay!" Phoenix cried. "I'm here! I'm here! Jay, you're alive!"

He flew up to his Guardian, expecting Jayesh to grab him. But Jayesh raised his hands and felt the air, groping pathetically in Phoenix's direction.

Then Phoenix saw the bandages over Jayesh's eyes. He halted, staring. "Oh no ... what happened?"

Jayesh loosened the bandage and peeled it off. "Riven is what happened." He turned his mangled face toward his ghost.

Phoenix's heart broke.

Awful red slashes marred Jayesh's cheeks, forehead, and eyes. Each cornea and sclera had been cut deeply as if with a knife. The blue Light that always danced in his eyes was gone.

"Oh Jay," Phoenix whispered, scanning the damage. His voice broke, grief and guilt spiraling through him. "Jay, I'm sorry. I should have been there when this happened." He opened his core and poured healing Light into his Guardian, rebuilding the delicate tissues and nerves. Jayesh's pain became Phoenix's for a fraction of a second - burning blackness like a constant fever. "I'm a stupid, selfish ghost, letting you go off alone. It doesn't matter how scared I was. Losing you is worse. I thought you were dead, Jay. I'd given up."

"I was so afraid you'd gone after me," Jayesh whispered. "I'd never have found you out there. I had to get back. Had to find you."

"I was going to," Phoenix replied. "I was only waiting for the portal to open again. You didn't come back, and Banner said that Uldren had gone in after you ... I assumed the worst. My poor Guardian."

Jayesh blinked as his eyes healed. "I can see again! Kind of."

"I'm not done," Phoenix said, pouring more Light into him. "Jay, you're empty. What happened to you out there?"

"Riven took me," Jayesh said, very quietly. "She used a chimera to pull my mind apart. I keep thinking I'm back there. I can _feel_ it. Please say you can make it stop."

Phoenix saw the damage - vast mental damage had been done to his Guardian's psyche. It would be so difficult to heal - he'd have to tamper with Jayesh's brain to put him back together. He moaned, "Oh Jay," and choked up. No, he was a brave ghost. He'd save his Light for his Guardian, not waste it on tears.

Phoenix was the first thing Jayesh saw as his eyes cleared. His beloved ghost, his shell open, Light surrounding him in a sky-blue aura. But the way he moved, the expression in his eye, conveyed his grief.

"This will take time," Phoenix choked, scanning Jayesh's head. "Your poor brain. I'll have to work on you while you sleep. My poor Guardian - I failed you so badly-"

He closed his shell at last. Jayesh lifted him out of the air and hugged him. Phoenix hid his eye against his Guardian's robe and simply drank in the feel of his spark. He'd never thought he'd feel that again. Now he understood why Jayesh had screamed for him like that - their terror of losing each other was mutual.

Other footsteps approached. Kari's voice called, "Did you find him?"

"Yes," Jayesh said, turning. He didn't release his ghost, only stroked his shell possessively. "He already healed my eyes."

Kari hurried up and gazed into his face a moment. "Your Light is back," she whispered, and kissed him.

"Your face is the most beautiful sight," Jayesh whispered, kissing her back. But still he clutched Phoenix with both hands.

Kari looked down at him. "Is he all right?"

"Neither of us are," Jayesh replied. "But we will be."

Pheonix laughed a little, then cried a little. Jayesh understood.

* * *

That night, as Jayesh slept, Phoenix gently began rebuilding his mind.

"I have to do it this way, too," Pulled Pork said from the room upstairs. "Our poor Guardians."

"I wronged him," Phoenix replied regretfully. "I let my fear get in the way, and he's so hurt, now. I'll make it up to him. I'm going to heal him perfectly."

"Me too," chirped Pork. "I mean, my Guardian was like this when I found him, but he's getting better. So long as we stay away from that dragon."

Phoenix gazed fondly at Jayesh, cuddled up with Kari on the narrow bed in the Dasa compound. He slept deeply, comforted by her presence, but nightmares lurked in the shadows of his mind. Phoenix kept them at bay. Not only did he slowly mend the fractures in Jayesh's mind, he constantly moderated the theta waves of his sleeping brain, preventing the nightmares from taking over. It wasn't hard to see them - Phoenix looked into Jayesh's memory with cold horror. Bones, and voices, and a burning grip. Claws ripping at his face. Tentacles probing through him. And Riven swearing to feast on his love for his ghost and family. Worst of all, he had tried to summon his Dawnblade, and Riven had ripped the very Light out of him. That was why his mind was so wrecked.

By the time morning arrived, Phoenix was in a quiet frenzy of rage. He'd always been protective of Jayesh, but Riven's treatment of him brought back the memories of the media smear campaign, the hate mail, the sideways glances and snickers from other Guardians. The snide questions from other ghosts. "Did you two cook up this Traveler thing together, or is your Guardian just a liar on his own?" All that had hurt them both. But this was worse - a calculated destruction of a Guardian from the inside.

Jayesh awoke and tensed, peering around the room. Then he realized where he was and relaxed, smiling up at Phoenix. "Did you stay up all night?" he thought. His mental voice was scratchy, somehow.

"Healing you," Phoenix replied. "How do you feel?"

Jayesh gazed at the ceiling for a while, poking around inside his own head. "Not so frantic. But I still feel strange. Like there's pieces in the wrong place." He held out a hand. Phoenix landed in his palm and let Jayesh cuddle him. It made some of his rage abate.

Jayesh still felt like the inside of his head had been invaded and robbed, leaving his thoughts in shambles. But lying there with Kari on one side and Phoenix on the other was deeply comforting. His eyes worked again, that was the main thing, he told himself. The less he dwelt on the things Riven had done to him, like the way she had seized his Dawnblade and ripped it away, the sooner he could forget the whole thing.

"Phoenix," he thought, "do I still have my sword?"

His ghost didn't answer.

"Uh ... Phoenix?"

"I haven't healed that part, yet," Phoenix evaded. "Give it time."

Jayesh hunted through himself, trying to find the fire. While his Light had returned, the fire was gone.

"She took it. She told me I was nothing. I'd never see Light or use it again." Jayesh burrowed his face into Kari's hair, as if trying to hide from the awful voice.

"It's not gone," Phoenix assured him. "She damaged that part of you. I'll get it back. And ... and you're not nothing. You're everything to me."

Jayesh didn't answer for a while, simply holding Kari and Phoenix close. When he thought to his ghost again, his mental voice was quiet. "This all started with a blessing of transcendent Light. For Ruith. I didn't know how it would affect Madrid. Or Uldren. Or Wren and Elledia. I just ... did as I was told. I think ... overall ... we did a good thing."

"We did," Phoenix replied. "We saved lives, Jay. Look at Uldren. How long would he have survived if you hadn't been standing there when he walked up that first time?"

"About thirty seconds," Jayesh thought. "He's a good guy, without all the baggage from his past life. People tell him things, but he doesn't remember them. He's going to have such a struggle to survive. I still want to help him, somehow."

"He may not appreciate that," Phoenix replied. "But I don't think he'll forget you, whatever happens."

Jayesh said nothing for a while, only watched the growing light outside the window. "I want to go home."

"Me too," Phoenix agreed.


	18. Intercession

The next few days consisted of meetings.

First, Petra Venj, the right hand of Mara Sov, requested a video meeting with Jayesh and Ruith about recovering Taken. Petra asked questions for hours, relaying them to other Awoken around her. It seemed that she was developing a plan to recover the Taken Techeuns.

Jayesh went out into the grounds around the Dasa compound and didn't return until after sunset. When Kari asked where he'd been, he looked distant and said, "Walking."

Phoenix healed him all night.

The next day, Ferral called a meeting with Wren, Madrid, Elledia, Ruith, and Jayesh. They discussed whether to send the Corsairs back to the Dreaming City. When Madrid insisted absolutely not, the discussion changed to how they could best support their fellow Corsairs from elsewhere in the Reef.

Jayesh left halfway through the meeting. Again, he went outside and didn't return until after dark. Kari asked Phoenix where they had been. The ghost would only say, "Around the grounds. We didn't leave, don't worry."

Again, Phoenix healed Jayesh all night.

The next day, Kari happened across Uldren in a shadowy corner of the compound, disguised in cheap armor with a hood over his face. "Have you seen Jayesh?" she asked him. "He keeps running off. I'm worried about him."

Uldren shrugged. "He's been through hell, ma'am. He needs space. But I'll see what I can do."

Thus it was that Uldren explored the park-like grounds that afternoon. He found Jayesh at the far end of the property, hidden by a fold in the hills. He'd discarded his warlock robe, and wore only his undershirt, pants, and boots. He went through Dawnblade forms over and over, holding each one for nearly a minute - high guard, riposte, middle guard, parry, low guard. But he used a stick instead of his sword. His clothing was drenched in sweat.

After a while, he stopped and turned to his watchful ghost. "Anything?"

"No."

Jayesh went through the forms all over again, stopping to ask the same question of his ghost. Again and again.

Uldren sat on a rock and watched for a while. Eventually, Jayesh had to rest. He sat in the shade of a nearby tree and gulped water from a large bottle stashed there.

Uldren got up and sauntered across the grass. "Hey."

Jayesh glanced at him. "Hey."

"Practicing?"

"You might say that."

Jayesh took a long drink. Uldren kicked the stick, which lay nearby. "Still no sword?"

Jayesh rested his elbows on his knees and stared at the stick. "No. Not a flicker of Solar Light. And sometimes I can't remember where I am."

Uldren leaned against the tree trunk. "Your wife's worried. You haven't told her?"

"I don't want her to know." Jayesh mopped his forehead on his shirt. "I've always been a Dawnblade. Righteous fire and healing. If I tell her that ... that that part of me is gone ... I don't know what she'll do. I have to get it back."

"Give it time," Uldren said. "You've only been recovering a few days. It took me a resurrection and two weeks before I could get near my Light. I still don't think it's as powerful as it should be." He summoned his golden gun and held it up, watching the fire lick along the barrel.

Jayesh sat there, shoulders slumped. "I can't hear the Traveler, either," he whispered. "It's like Riven lobotomized me. So much is just ... gone."

"Same here," Uldren replied. "Do you feel like the inside of your head is bleeding, sometimes?"

"Yes ... yes, that's how it feels."

They sat there in silence, two wounded soldiers who understood each other.

"Tell your wife," Uldren said. "She needs to know. Don't shut her out."

"I don't want her to be ashamed of me," Jayesh murmured. "Without my Light, I'm barely a Guardian."

"So let her know, idiot," Uldren said, spinning the golden gun and letting it vanish. "I can't stay here and babysit you. Ferral's lawyers freed up my assets. I've got enough glimmer to buy a ship and supplies. I'm getting off the Reef."

"Where you headed?" Jayesh asked.

Uldren shrugged. "Around. It depends."

"Well." Jayesh looked as if he wanted to say a lot of things, but couldn't find the words. "Thanks. For the rescue. Keep in touch."

"Consider us even," Uldren said with a sudden grin. "For taking bullets for me. I took Queensfoil for you. I hate that stuff."

Jayesh grinned a little. "Nasty. Hope I never have to touch it again."

"Stay out of the Ascendant Realm," Uldren said. "And don't be so hard on yourself. You're hurt. It's fine to take time to recover."

Jayesh gazed at him for a long moment. "Thanks."

"Anytime." Uldren straightened. "I'm taking off. Might be a while before we see each other again."

Jayesh scrambled to his feet. "Hey. I just wanted to say - if you ever need help, have your ghost send mine a message. I'll stick by you, if you need a friend."

Uldren slowly nodded, touched. "Might be handy to know one Guardian who doesn't hate me."

Jayesh retrieved his stick and robe, and they walked back to the compound together. They discussed jumpship builds all the way, debating which type would suit Uldren the best. They parted ways at the compound with a handshake.

Uldren didn't see Jayesh again for a long time.

* * *

"I hear you're leaving," Madrid said.

Jayesh and Kari were having an early dinner before heading back to Earth. Madrid approached their table, pulled out a chair, and sat down. The mess hall was filled with a murmur of voices as other Guardians ate their evening meal. Golden sunlight streamed through the tall windows. It gleamed on Madrid's hunter armor and drowned the glow of his yellow eyes.

"Yes, we are," Kari said stiffly. "What do you want?"

Madrid shrugged. "Nothing much." He turned to Jayesh. "I wanted to thank you for saving Wren and Elledia."

Jayesh inclined his head. "No problem."

"I have hope again," Madrid said. He gestured to his arm band. Two of the four lights were lit. "I'll have to return to the Dreaming City soon. But I can visit Wren here every night. She and Elledia are setting up a remote monitoring station to watch the curse from the outside."

"Good," Jayesh said. "I paid a high price for them."

"Like what you paid for Ruith?" Madrid said.

Jayesh paused, thinking about it. Ruith had mentioned the Light paying a high price for her. And it had cost him his Dawnblade and his sight to free the Corsairs. Maybe he shouldn't be surprised that the Darkness demanded payment in precious Light.

Kari gave him a surprised look. "What's he talking about?"

"Light," Jayesh said. "I ... I don't know how to tell you this. Riven took my Dawnblade. I can't use it at all anymore."

Kari stared at him, stricken. She reached across the table and took his hand, her eyes wide.

Madrid, too, looked shocked. He rocked back in his chair, yellow eyes widening. After a moment, he said, "That wasn't what I meant, but ... yes. You accomplished what I couldn't. And I ... I haven't been kind to you. I wanted to apologize. For everything." He looked at Kari as he spoke, extending the apology to her, too.

"Don't," Jayesh said. "No apologies necessary. Now that Riven did a number on me, I understand more about what you've gone through. And ... I don't even know what I'm trying to say. But consider yourself forgiven. We're good."

Madrid smiled for the first time in weeks, as if Jayesh's acceptance had eased a great burden.

Kari said nothing.

Madrid got up. "I'll let you two finish your dinner. I need to head back, while I still have time. Take it easy."

"You, too." Jayesh watched the burly hunter depart.

As soon as they were alone, Kari clutched Jayesh's hand. "You lost your Dawnblade?"

He met her eyes and nodded. "I've been going through my training exercises, trying to get it back. But ... it's not there."

"Jay, I'm so sorry." She stroked his face. "You must be devastated. I didn't know."

He pressed her hand to his face and kissed her palm. "I thought I could regain it in a few days, but I haven't. I didn't want you to be ... disappointed."

"Why would I be disappointed? You're hurt, Jay."

He stared at his plate for a long moment. "I know that's one reason you married me. Because ... I used the Light differently from Rem. And now I'm ... less."

"I married you for you," Kari said, taking both his hands across the table. "Don't be like this, you know I can't stand it. Have you lost Arc and Void?"

"No, those are still there. But I'm not very good at using them." He sighed. "And I can't reach the Traveler. I spoke to it through my Light, but without my Solar, I can't ... really use the other types ... to communicate."

They held hands and gazed at each other a long moment. Kari's gaze was full of melting tenderness. Slowly it hardened into determination.

"Here's what we're going to do," Kari said at last. "We're flying home. You're visiting the meditation spa in the Core District, beneath the Traveler. And you're going to get your fire back."

He smiled and his eyes filled with tears. She understood - why had he worried? Kari knew him better than he did, himself. And she had such a simple plan. He had been so afraid that she'd reject him, and she'd embraced him, instead.

"That means so much to me," he whispered around the knot in his throat.

Kari squeezed his hands. "Let's finish and head home. The sooner you're well, the better."

* * *

The Last City was arranged in rings and districts that radiated outward from beneath the Traveler. Directly beneath it, the sense of Light was strongest, Guardian or no Guardian. Here minds were enhanced, bodies were restored, and the secrets of the universe were explored. The greatest hospitals and universities occupied the Core District.

The Vanguard had constructed what they called a meditation spa there. It was a little walled garden, open to the sky, with beds and couches everywhere where Guardians might relax and refresh in the Light. In particular, badly injured Guardians sought it out - Guardians with wounds beyond a ghost's capacity to heal.

The spa was empty that morning as Jayesh entered. An Exo woman ushered him in. "Take as long as you need, dear. The snack bar is always open."

"Thanks," Jayesh said, looking around. It was all lawns and gravel paths, flower beds and fountains. Rather like the Gardens of Esila, but not quite as aristocratic.

He settled himself on a padded bench and gazed up at the Traveler. From beneath, the old wounds it had received in the Collapse were all that were visible. Even in the morning sunlight, blue Light glowed deep within.

He closed his eyes and soaked in the ambient Light. It filled the air, warm and potent, cracking with energy. "I could make serious Light constructs here without trying," he thought to his ghost.

Phoenix phased into being and swept Jayesh with a healing beam. "All my abilities are on overcharge," he remarked. "I love the Core District. Remember healing in the hospital during the plague?"

"Core was always the easiest," Jayesh agreed, without moving or opening his eyes.

Phoenix worked on him, his beam so low, it felt like a warm breeze. Whenever Jayesh had rested or slept on the ride home, Phoenix was there with healing.

Jayesh had seen the Vanguard healers upon arriving at the City, a few hours before. They had examined him gravely, and informed him that he had stage five psychic damage. They also warned him to file no reports until he had dropped below stage two.

"They don't want me writing down a bunch of hallucinations," Jayesh thought.

"You're not hallucinating," Phoenix said fiercely. "I kill them whenever they start."

"You kill them ...? What would I be seeing, then?"

Phoenix floated in front of his Guardian in silence until Jayesh crackled an eyelid to peek at him.

"Bones," he said simply.

Jayesh shuddered and shifted positions. "Thanks for keeping me sane, little light."

"It's my fault you're hurt," Phoenix said softly, returning to work. "Traveler forgive me, I've failed you so badly."

"It might hear you," Jayesh said, pointing at the orb overhead.

Phoenix glanced upward. "So what? It's true. And I'm going to heal you, if it takes years."

Jayesh sat in silence for a while, dozing a little in the aura of Light and his ghost's comforting healing. Spa records stated that the Guardians who healed quickest were the ones who slept out here. So Jayesh gave himself permission to rest deeply.

After a long while, half-asleep, he reached for his Light and thought, "Traveler?"

No answer. No touch of extra Light. He was still cut off. Jayesh dozed again, refusing to let himself panic. It wasn't time yet, that was all.

He tried over and over as the day wore on. At noon, he ate at the snack bar, then tried different seats around the gardens. He found one he liked better, in the back, in a little enclosed glade. The Light's presence was almost tangible there.

As he basked, Jayesh became aware of a faint collection of voices. It sounded like a party he was overhearing from another room. Then Phoenix spoke, and he realized he was hearing ghosts.

"He's so sick, everyone. Has anyone else any experience with psychic damage?"

"My Guardian had some," said a female ghost. "She had a bad experience with a Hive wizard. Stage three damage. I think they call it that because that's how many months it took to heal her."

The ghosts murmured among themselves. Jayesh sat perfectly still. He was picking up one of the Light channels that ghosts used to talk among themselves, and was hearing something that few Guardians were ever privy to - ghost chatter.

"Not even resurrection fixes it," another ghost chimed in. "My Guardian went full Thantonaut for a while, if you know what I mean. I had to ask the Vanguard to intervene. He was so sick."

"My Guardian never did recover," said another ghost in a low, dreary voice. "He abandoned me and sought the Darkness. He's a Shadow of Yor, now."

The ghosts murmured sympathetically.

"What stage was he?" Phoenix asked.

"Stage five. He lost his Light and everything."

"My Guardian is stage five," Phoenix whispered.

"How is he?" several voices asked. "That's bad, bad."

"I'm keeping him sane," Phoenix reported, "but it's an hourly fight. I'm already so tired. We're in the Core District and I can barely keep up."

Absolute silence.

Jayesh tried not to grimace and give himself away. This was educational. And frightening.

A single ghost said, "You ... you're going to have to intercede for him."

"Yes, intercession," the other ghosts whispered. "The Traveler listens."

"But it's my fault he's hurt," Phoenix said brokenly. "How can I intercede when I'm the one in the wrong? I let him travel the Ascendant Realm alone."

"You did what?" many voices exclaimed. "You thought he would survive alone? How stupid are you? Why would you do that?"

"I was afraid," Phoenix said in a small voice. Jayesh felt him actually cowering behind his head, his shell touching his Guardian's hair. "My Guardian let me stay behind, even though he was afraid, too."

More silence.

Then a female ghost said, "Your Guardian is too good for you. You don't deserve to be his ghost. You don't deserve the Light at all."

This was too much for Jayesh. He sat up, turned, and caught Phoenix out of the air. "Now you listen," he snarled, not sure if the other ghosts could hear him or not. Phoenix blinked up at him in terror. "You lay off him. He's the best ghost a Guardian could ask for. We may have made a bad decision, but we made it together. Now you either give good advice or shut the hell up."

"They heard you," Phoenix whimpered. "Light and Darkness, they heard you."

"His Guardian is on the network," the ghosts murmured to each other. "Core District. Of course."

"We should have encrypted the frequency."

"Too late, now."

A ghost said, "Sir, our apologies. But your ghost has more or less committed treason against you."

"What do you want me to do?" Jayesh snapped. "Throw him away?"

"Ikora's ghost didn't speak to her for sixty years," another ghost said. "Your ghost deserves similar treatment. You have stage five because of his negligence? He should be punished."

"He's holding back my hallucinations," Jayesh said. "Isn't that punishment enough?"

The ghosts muttered noncommittally.

Jayesh leaned his forehead against Phoenix's shell. "Other ghosts are mean."

"But they're right," Phoenix whispered. "You're not a Dawnblade anymore because of me." He made a sound as if drawing a deep breath. "I'm going to intercede on your behalf. Maybe the Traveler hasn't completely written me off. Sit down and relax, Jay. We'll see if I remember how to do this."

Jayesh did, letting his ghost float into the air again. "How does it work?"

"Hush," Phoenix said, gazing upward. "I have to concentrate." He phased from sight.

Jayesh lay back in the Light and waited.

When Phoenix made the sound, Jayesh jumped. He'd expected words. What he heard instead was a low moan that rose in register to an agonized scream. Afterward, there was a short silence. Then Phoenix began to sing.

He used a language Jayesh had never heard before, melodic syllables that intermeshed into patterns of thought. As Jayesh listened, he realized the music was creating pictures - vivid pictures of himself, as Phoenix saw him. They were so heart-rendingly honest that Jayesh stuck his fingers in his ears for a while. He saw himself as a hero, a towering Dawnblade who cut down Gate Lords and armies of aliens. Then he saw himself as a pathetic, prideful, self-pitying whiner. Ugh, Phoenix had his measure, all right.

Jayesh only unplugged his ears when the song changed. Now Phoenix was pouring out nightmare images of Jayesh's hallucinations. But to Jayesh, they weren't visions - they were memories of the Ascendant Realm and Riven's clutch. His ghost had seen far more than Jayesh had mentioned. So much for hiding anything.

As Phoenix sang the images, the Light built around them. The Traveler was listening. Jayesh reached out one hand, trying to speak to it, but he had been struck dumb. Riven had cut out his mental voice. Instead, Phoenix spoke for him.

His song was basically, "Here is my Guardian. Here is what happened. Have mercy."

Jayesh waited for a vision, or a voice, or instant healing. But nothing happened. The Light slowly faded back to normal. Phoenix hung in the air, surrounded by motes of Light, gazing rapturously upward. Jayesh felt suddenly alone and cut off. What if the Traveler decided that he was too damaged to waste time on? What if it simply let him die, alone and Lightless?

Someone sat on the bench beside him. Jayesh jumped - he hadn't heard anyone approach. Then he looked at the person and laughed. It was a man in a white and gold warlock robe, his hood shading his face and glowing sky-blue eyes. The Traveler had sent him its avatar.

"Traveler!" Jayesh exclaimed.

The avatar turned with a smile. "Guardian Jayesh. Your ghost has made intercession for you."

"Yes sir. I'm not really sure what that means."

"He asked for help on your behalf, because you could not ask for yourself." The avatar lifted one hand and rested it on Jayesh's head. "Ah, I see the damage, Guardian. You have been savagely wounded by Darkness. Tell me. What of your Dawnblade?"

Jayesh sat there, feeling the warm hand on his head, completely trusting, like a small ghost in hand of its Guardian. "I've lost touch with it, sir. Phoenix says he can bring it back, eventually."

"Perhaps," mused the Traveler. "This wound is complex and very deep. Healing it is changing the shape of your mind."

Jayesh hesitated to ask the question. "What's that mean?"

"What did the creature say when she devoured your Light?"

"She said ..." Jayesh swallowed a sudden dryness in his throat. "She said that now I was nothing, created out of nothing, for nothing, and my end would be nothing." The words still echoed in his head like an evil benediction, a curse upon his very existence.

The avatar nodded slowly, pondering this. "Yes, I see."

"Can I be healed?"

The Traveler didn't answer for a time. Then he said, "How did this wound come about?"

"Well ..." Jayesh tried not to sound accusing. "You sent me to redeem a Taken. I did that."

"You did," the Traveler agreed. "But that was not all."

"Well, once we had Ruith, she helped us save two Corsairs from dying in the time loop."

"Yes," the Traveler said. "Accompanied by a Guardian you did not trust."

Jayesh said nothing. Uldren Sov was too large a topic to summarize.

"You left your ghost when you entered the Ascendant Realm," the Traveler observed. "Why is that?"

"I was afraid," Phoenix broke in. "He left me behind as an act of kindness, though he was scared, too. All this is my fault."

"All?" the Traveler said, looking at the ghost. "You take credit for the Ahamkara's viciousness?"

Phoenix looked down.

"Had you been there," the Traveler went on, "she would have tracked you down sooner by the taste of your fear. She was delighted to find a solo Guardian. At the same time, she was disappointed. The Ahamkara are not kind to ghosts."

Phoenix said nothing.

The Traveler returned his attention to Jayesh. "You carried a blessing and received a curse in return. It doesn't seem fair, does it?"

"No," Jayesh muttered.

The Traveler was silent a moment. Then he smiled. "Dear Guardian. The time has come for you to shed your blade."

"Wh-what?" Jayesh gasped. "But - my Dawnblade-"

"You cannot get it back, now. But Solar Light has many aspects. Do you know of the Sunsingers?"

"Yes," Jayesh said. "They're an elite class of Solar warlocks, and ... Traveler, you want me to become a Sunsinger?"

"You must have Solar Light to heal, Guardian Jayesh. But it could not return because you are not the same. As you have changed, so must your Light change. Now." The avatar removed his hand from his head and rose to his feet, his white robe flowing about him. "I shall teach you the song of stars, of suns, of unquenchable fire. And you must learn the tender refrain of healing, for a healer you remain. Fill your lungs, my Guardian, and sing with me."

* * *

Kari looked up as the apartment door opened. "Jayesh?"

He walked in, smiling, and she knew at once that something good had happened. He'd lost the crumpled, anxious look. His gaze was steady, his movements easier.

"Are you well?" she asked, hurrying to him.

He took both her hands and kissed her lightly. "I'm much better, lovelight. Not a hundred percent, yet, but closer than I was."

Kari studied his face. The Light in his eyes was brighter, and there was something intangibly changed - a certain radiance hung about him, as if his Light was overflowing. "Did you talk to the Traveler?"

Jayesh looked at Phoenix, who floated at his shoulder. "Phoenix had to talk for me. But the Traveler is merciful and generous. It made me a Sunsinger."

Kari's heart jolted. "A Sunsinger? But what happened to your Dawnblade?"

Jayesh's face fell. "Apparently, healing me without reconnecting to Solar Light first has changed the shape of my mind. I can't use the Dawnblade anymore. That's why it made me a Sunsinger. It's like a promotion." Even now, he looked uncertain, as if this new configuration of Light was as foreign to him as a new limb.

She hugged him tightly, elated and grieved for him at the same time. He'd lost so much of himself in the Dreaming City. Now he was forever changed - her dear husband and friend. It frightened her, but infuriated her, too - that this would happen to her kind, gentle Jayesh.

"I'm with you every step of the way," she whispered. "We'll get you healed and trained up, the way you're supposed to be."

"Thanks," he whispered back. "I couldn't do this without you." He drew a deep breath. "Let's sit down. I have a song to teach you."

* * *

The end


End file.
